0livine Posted October 6, 2012 Share Posted October 6, 2012 My boyfriend broke up with me almost 2 weeks ago because he was going through depression and told me that he just needed to be alone, and that I should move on without him. I was torn apart. The first week was the worst time of my entire life. I cried all the time, felt sick, couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, and all I could think about was that the breakup only happened because he was depressed. Alone for my birthday, I got a card and present from him in the post, and cried with relief that he still cared. So all this week I've been feeling much better, not perfect, but thinking that he does care and that there's a chance of getting back together. Today, we met up for a day out, and had coffee, lunch and went shopping. I liked spending time with him but at the back of my mind was confusion, why wasn't he talking about the breakup at all? Finally, soon before I was going to leave, he said that it's only now that he realises what a fool he's been and he wants me back. I kissed him, and soon afterwards we had sex. This is what I'd wanted, right? But the thing is that now that we are back on, I feel worried about going straight back into things again. He really really hurt me and I don't think I will forget about that very easily. I said I loved him, and he said he loved me, but on the bus back I began to think and wonder whether I actually did or not. It's hard to tell right now. Can someone who's ever gotten back with an ex shed some light on how to deal with my current feelings? I know that he made a mistake with the breakup and he says if he could go back in time and undo it, he would. But he still did it. I've had some great times with him (6-7 months) and he's my first boyfriend, and I've often thought that he could be the one. Is it normal that I've got cold feet at this stage? Link to post Share on other sites
Million.to.1 Posted October 6, 2012 Share Posted October 6, 2012 this is a hard one. he has boken your trust and of course you are worried that he will do it again. and the truth is, he probably will. if you are back together now, i would recommend taking it really slowly. Protect yourself. let him win your trust back. it shouldn't be easy for him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
gamman Posted October 6, 2012 Share Posted October 6, 2012 (edited) If you are back with someone, and it's causing you stress/anxiety, you shouldn't be back with them. Maybe down the road, but not right now. I wouldn't go back to being bf/gf immediately. Take time to heal from the first break up. Communicate with him. Resolve your unresolved issues. Talk about your emotions and hurt. Let him know how bab he hurt you. See if you can even resolve your unresolved issues. Take it from there. If not, it's doomed. Once upon a time, a gf dumped me, in a crappy way. I was in a lot of pain. She called a few months later, and begged for me back. I took her back. She would never discuss what happened, talk about emotions. I wanted to. Things were just supposed to be "normal" again. I never got back those true feelings of love and affection for her. Eight months later we split again. It again was very painful for me. Resolve the unresolved issues the best you can then decide if you want to get back together. Be careful and good luck. Edited October 6, 2012 by gamman 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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