bothered Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 here is the story: we were dating exclusively for 4 months. Half way though that period my b/friend lost his job contract, and that put a lot of pressure on him, on me and our relationship. He was becoming more and more distant, and I'm more upset and clingy.. anyhow, eventually he sent me an "awol" message saying that he needed to take a few weeks off to clear his head on a whole range of subjets, including personal relationships. I knew that was a breakup, but was still hopeful.. it was a very hard time for me.. after about 2 months of this separation, I saw his ad on an online dating service. I decided to contact him to see what was happening in his life. Don't know why I did that, I was not over him yet and was still probably hopeful or maybe just wanted an explanation and a clear-cut ending.. he replied that he was depressed over his job situation as it made him feel worthless and that he would want to be my friend, but rather not venture beyond as "I deserve better" and he would not want me to think that his interest was just sexual.. Eventually we met, after 3 moths apart. He was emotional, apologized, and said that he still had feelings for me, but could not commit and did not want to lead me on, would want to have a casual relationship.. a few days later we became intimate and did not talk about this anymore. In a meantime he had to go away for 2 weeks for a short contract and an interview, then he was back, and we were very happy like nothing ever happened, then he got a job offer and accepted it. It all happen so quick, in less than a month. Now he's leaving to another city miles away. I will see him tomorrow for the last time and then he goes.. I feel devastated, he does not talk about a future for us, just him.. though he said that he wanted me to visit him once he's settled and that he would be missing me.. I don't know what to do or say. Is this the end? What can I do or should I do? It hurts terribly, not knowing.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bothered Posted January 23, 2004 Author Share Posted January 23, 2004 I forgot to mention, that all this time he was very attentive, caring, wanted to see me a lot, in other words, there were no regular signs of a breakup.. Link to post Share on other sites
lost lamb Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 hate to be blunt, but you are not a priority in his life, he even told you he "could not commit and did not want to lead [you] on, would want to have a casual relationship." if you are looking for something more serious, it doesn't look like you are going to get that from him. it sounds like you're pretty hung up on him and chances are, if you continue your relationship, you will be hurt again. i hope things get better for you. Link to post Share on other sites
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