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Comforting to see I am not the only one needing advice

Here's my story

 

Long term relationship 3 years

Engaged

She broke it off

still love each othershe "accedently" got pregnant with another guys kid "didn't mean anything" "never happen again"

 

Things seem to be going soo good

then nothing for a couple days and I have to start all over again

I don't get it women are the most confusing creatures on this planet

 

I am a published poet and very romantic

I have tryed everything and gotten so far but just when my goal is in sight she pulls away

 

Why is she afraid

 

Left Out

Where is my star

Up in the nights sky

Where do I go, and how far

To get my piece of the pie

When is it my chance

To win on the wheel of life

How high do I lift my lance

Or do I only get a knife

Why don’t I get to choose

Where we go today

Do I always have to loose

Whenever I want to play

How come the cup is half empty

And never filled to the top

Why do people always test me

Won’t they ever stop

Why am I always last in line

Whenever I go anywhere

Does it have to take so much time

To find my star up there

If we are all created the same

Then why can’t I shout

If were all playing the game

Why am I left out

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When you find the right lady, she won't be so confusing. Women are equipped with decryption equipment which they employ when they find the right man. So if you can't understand one of them, that means she's the wrong one for you.

 

Your poetry is nice. Poetry was invented for people to write on occasions when they are unable to understand the opposite sex. Stop writing poetry and go find a lady who will love you, want to be with you and be kind to you....one who won't have the baby of a guy she hardly knows.

 

When you become strong, you will have no problems with love.

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I would say you should know a person well enough after 3 years. Did she cheat on you during those years? YES!

 

The day you found out she had an affair or the day she told you she was pregnant should have been the last day you saw and thought about her. Or do you both see other people and agree that its OK? If thats the case than there will always be mixed up feelings for each other.

 

You need to end everything with her before you its too late and you get too involved with raising her baby while shes out screwing town. Its just best to leave her and not look back.

 

She can look at it like she lost you but gained a child. You lost her and gained a better future with someone who you will find, love, cherish and someone who wants to do the same for you.

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Just a question - does only have to do with your answer - does this also work for men - meaning if you do not understand them then they are not the right "one" cuz they do not want you to understand them??? (if I got it right?) ??? :confused: I really don't get that part! I only don't get it for women and I am a woman... please explain! Thanx!

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I dont know what happened before her having an affair, so I really dont know, if I could forgive in your shoes - say if my bf impregnated another woman. Funny thing is, in my two previous long-term relationsships (12 years and 3 years) I was never jealous, even when my partner did cheat (had an affair for a couple months and my reaction was: just go ahead and f* her, you will get her out of your system). Now I am with my bf/fiancé since 1 1/2 years and I know I would be jealous as hell, have a fight with him, guess even a "bitch-fight" with the other woman, but I do still think, that I could forgive him a one-time fling - but just the one and if he would not try to hide it (trust). Sure I would be hurt like hell and it would not be easy to overcome, but loving can mean to be able to forgive too. But then I never truly loved before, always held back the emotional commitement part.

 

Sometimes men and women do talk different languages. Maybe read the book: WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS, MEN ARE FROM MARS (by a Mr. Gray). It does explain a lot of the common misunderstandings.

 

If I were you, I would have a real serious talk with her. Some counseling might do good too, for both of you. Could very well be that she has been hurt in the past (childhood, relationsships) and has this believe that she is not worthy and therefore sabotages a good relationsship to prove her own "unworthiness" or it could be, that she really does not want the same from a relationsship as you. But in counseling you have a good chance of finding it out. And then you can either decide to have a go or to cut your losses.

 

I wish you all the best and follow your own heart.

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