ConfusedInOC Posted July 4, 2005 Share Posted July 4, 2005 First she dumps me for a guy (no break) and they're in bed within a few weeks. She was way more into him than he was of her. 6 weeks into the relationship she asks him to commit to her, he says "I can't" so she dumps him. Three days later she's up in San Jose shacking up with another guy. She stayed there with him all of the month of June. She just got home yesterday and promptly announced she's moving up to San Jose to live with the guy. This is a guy she has known off and on for about 10 months (online) but spent little time together (personally) until she went up there. Oh, did I mention? She is 28, he is 21. She's very confused and just wants to be out of the house and out of school. I can understand that. But running around with a 21 year old "kid?" They have so little in common, which is what makes it so odd. I just don't understand the mentality of her to run around like this. Her family is devastated. No break between me the guy from Church and no break between the guy from Church and the new guy. Rebound, rebound, rebound. One thing is for sure, her behavior gives a crystal clear image of who she is and it's not someone I want in my life anymore. Yes, I realize the irony of saying that in a post that is about her, but talking about it helps me work through what she has done to me. It helps me accept the reality that I deserve better. And now that I've got all my ducks in a row I can at least put to rest any idea in my head of getting back together with her and move on for good. Thanks to everyone who has offered me advice here. I am going to take a break from LS and hopefully the next time you hear from me I will have met someone new and deserving of me. This has been a heartbreaking but educational year for me. I've lived, I've loved, I've lost and I've found....myself. Link to post Share on other sites
smile95 Posted July 4, 2005 Share Posted July 4, 2005 THanks for helping us all! I am glad you are starting to see the real her and I hope that you do find the girl of your dreams....you deseve it! Link to post Share on other sites
moon Posted July 4, 2005 Share Posted July 4, 2005 One thing is for sure, her behavior gives a crystal clear image of who she is and it's not someone I want in my life anymore. It seems very clear that that is the case. Your ex sounds like she has some major issues. You could look at this as closure. She's obviously just trying to fill some huge gapping hole inside herself. She'll never fill it. She'll probably never be satisfied. I think she's probably just using all these men to gain superficial self-esteem. None of these men will make her happy--I don't think. They'll just get used for temporary comfort. I guess it's good you are finding all this out about her. I'm sure it really makes you think. Sounds like it was the best thing that she got out of your life. This girl has probably caused a lot of headaches in her time. Good for you for building your own self-esteem and realizing this girl (and her behavior) isn't right for you anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
Naive Posted July 4, 2005 Share Posted July 4, 2005 Good Luck ConfusedInOC. I hope everything goes as you want it to. Take care and do not fall foe her lies again (that is if she tries). Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConfusedInOC Posted July 7, 2005 Author Share Posted July 7, 2005 Thanks for the well wishes. I came back to post on my date last night. It went very well (See thread in dating forum) Link to post Share on other sites
Opium Posted July 7, 2005 Share Posted July 7, 2005 I've lived, I've loved, I've lost and I've found....myself. That is so true, I can relate to this ^!! Good luck, and wish you the best with love! Link to post Share on other sites
Marshbear Posted July 7, 2005 Share Posted July 7, 2005 her behavior gives a crystal clear image of who she is and it's not someone I want in my life anymore This is soooo true. Just be thankful for the knowledge you have now and that you are moving forward. I wish you luck CIOC.... Take care.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author ConfusedInOC Posted July 7, 2005 Author Share Posted July 7, 2005 Originally posted by Marshbear This is soooo true. Just be thankful for the knowledge you have now and that you are moving forward. I wish you luck CIOC.... Take care.... Her behavior, especially the incessant denial/lying, is completely baffling. I have never, ever met a woman of her age who acted so much like a teenager. I'm serious when I say this, but she would be a Counselor's dream come true to pick into that brain and try and sort out her wiring -- if that would ever be possible. Link to post Share on other sites
Naive Posted July 7, 2005 Share Posted July 7, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC Thanks for the well wishes. I came back to post on my date last night. It went very well (See thread in dating forum) Hey but I thought you were taking a break from LS If you say you are going to do something do it Link to post Share on other sites
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