When a break-up didn't happen, but contact stops

[notmakingsense]

So -- I wrote my on-and-off-again GF a note expressing my frustrations at her once again holding back and not letting us get closer. I told her that if we can't move forward, maybe we aren't right for each-other, but that I would step back and see where she wanted to lead things. I also told her that I very much wanted to move forward, as I can see us being together for the long-haul, and that she's the one for me.

 

Since then, I've gotten no responses to either additional notes or voice-mails.

 

It has been about a week.

 

I guess I should interpret all of this as an unspoken agreement or affirmation that it won't work out -- but darn-it, it is frustrating me that I can't get some sort of "closure", final conversation, or even a response from her!

 

In my opinion, this is making it even harder to cope than if I were outright rejected.

 

What do you think, should I continue to try to get a final conversation from her, or just go NC myself?

 

-- NMS

[Marshbear]

I would take her lack of response as your answer. She would contact you if she felt otherwise. Sometimes closure is not really what you need because it can get mean and hateful if you don't like her response. I would also question why you felt the need to e-mail your problems with her as words can be misinterpreted and their is no "back and forth". If you wanted closure you should have talked to her rather than e-mail ..

[notmakingsense]

Thanks Marshbear.

 

I wrote her rather than talked because she has been avoiding this subject. I have started to talk to her about her lack of committment before, and in person, she avoids and stops the conversations. During this particular night, I was feeling a heightened level of frustration and felt the need to write.

 

You are probably right in that if I force a conversation over this issue that I'm likely not going to like what I hear.

 

Oh well -- but yet this seems harder to deal with as my mind can also interpret a lack of response as an "I don't know" or "I'm not sure" -- meaning that there still might be a chance.