Mrlonelyone Posted May 9, 2015 Share Posted May 9, 2015 (edited) I have to get this off my chest. Last night I had a bizzare dream about an ex I spent a great deal of time with for 9 months coupled almost two years ago. Contact from her last month and a few weeks of communications both ways reminded me of her. She never followed through. In this dream it spanned two days. The first day we were working together on an experiment. Something which for scientist can actually be quite intimate if it is just you and your SO working on it. Like any more ordinary date activity in a way. Ask the Curies. On day one we didn't get much work done as we put hands on eachother more than any of the equipment. As a matter of fact we were mixing some sort of a solution in a beaker...but we are not chemist. A symbol of our chemistry...as it were? On day two we didn't touch eachother at all. Not even in my dreams. In other words I dreamed up a microcosm of the relationship we had. Up one day down the next. Way up one week, way down the next. Come spend the holidays with my family and I one month, I never want to see you again the next, followed by staking out the entry way to our common place of work. We had by my count 1900 -2500 hours of contentment and 250 -300 hours of unreasonable hell just before I graduated. If I did anything ...I can only finger the fact I was looking nationwide for a job and my leaving was becoming too real. Does anyone know a way to consciously will ones self to not dream of a specific subject? What on Earth can I do? (Besides no contact, my door is closed but I am open to hearing a knock) Why won't my subconscious mind even let her go? Edited May 9, 2015 by Mrlonelyone Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted May 9, 2015 Share Posted May 9, 2015 Can you stop yourself from dreaming about someone? No. The subconscious does what it does. However, the more you think about them when you're awake, the more they'll come up when you're asleep. Hell, the ex that brought me here 2.5 years ago was in a dream of mine the other night. However, it was something about her being really far down on my list of Facebook friends, which I guess is my subconscious acknowledging that I barely think about her ever. Who knows, it wasn't very important. And honestly, I think you should revise your "I'm open to hearing a knock" to "I'm open to hearing a knock and her giving me the right password". You've reacted to knocks before and it doesn't really do you any good. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mrlonelyone Posted May 9, 2015 Author Share Posted May 9, 2015 (edited) Thanks I was thinking I must be totally weird for having such a dream this far down the line. It lead me to take my folder of info on her and .zip it then delete the non .zipped file. Out of sight more out of mind. A virtual shoe box in the closet. And honestly, I think you should revise your "I'm open to hearing a knock" to "I'm open to hearing a knock and her giving me the right password". You've reacted to knocks before and it doesn't really do you any good. I love the way you put that. It will have to take more than a knock. I can't expect her to approach with the bold maturity of someone closer to my age...but I can demand more than I've gotten from her. Lately. We supported eachother and gave eachother kinds of intimacy that only come with lots of time and undivided attention. I don't want to be too specific but...she was there when I really needed somebody and I hope vice versa. With all the people in the world... there has to be someone who I can love and who will love me back in the way I deserve (at least for a long time in my life.) There has to be something better than this 4**ked situation. Edited May 9, 2015 by Mrlonelyone Link to post Share on other sites
crimsontactics Posted May 9, 2015 Share Posted May 9, 2015 It's normal to dream of your ex, especially right after breakup. Like the above mentioned reasons, the main cause is because you spend most of the day thinking about your ex. Just take a chill pill. Stay strong! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mrlonelyone Posted May 9, 2015 Author Share Posted May 9, 2015 It's normal to dream of your ex, especially right after breakup. It is not exactly right after the big break but after the abortive reconnection a couple weeks ago... it feels just as bad. Like the above mentioned reasons, the main cause is because you spend most of the day thinking about your ex. Just take a chill pill. Stay strong! Thanks. I will. I don't spend most of the day thinking of her (though it can seem that way here.) It will be hard but I will eventually stop thinking of her at all. Link to post Share on other sites
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