New here and devastated

[LoveLostForever]

Last week, my wife told me she wanted a divorce and is moving out. I have no words to describe how I feel, devastated is an understatement. I can't sleep, eat or function.

 

We had our issues and about six years ago she brought this up. I thought everything was fine but have to admit that I let myself lax on the original issues (communication, demonstrating my affection). She doesn't want to try to fix things this time because of that.

 

I suggested going to counseling and came up with a list of long term changes, I would do anything to keep our familiy together and she is the love of my life.

 

I feel hopeless and don't see what good life may hold for me in the future. My social circle was small, so I don't have very many people to provide support.

 

I've decided to go to counseling, since my health insurance covers it, but so far it's been amazingly frustrating since none of the Psychologists I've called answer their phones or return calls.

 

The void I feel is hard to describe and I fear I'm losing the will to go on.

[GG3]

Wow none of the psychologists are returning yours calls?

 

That is really strange. I would keep calling and searching for more until you get a hold of one. One of them has got to answer.

 

Maybe there are some support groups in your community too?

[MushyPeas]

Hey, give yourself a break, it's still early days and the way you're feeling won't last even if it seems never ending.

 

You're making extremely positive steps for yourself! Even if the psychologists are being rubbish, don't let this put you off, you've started something good so continue with it.

 

I said earlier in a post how it's easy to fall into the trap of self blame and going through every situation, every argument or every time you know there was a problem and how you could have done things differently. Stop.

Easier said that done but just do yourself a favour, give your mind a break because you must be absolutely exhausted.

 

If she has refused to give it another go, or to make an attempt to work through things then you need to take a deep breath and do those same things for yourself, it can't do any harm.

 

Your social circle was small but it doesn't have to be? not at all. It's the last thing on your mind right now but you need to make more time, more room within yourself for other activities and less room for negative thoughts, it takes a lot to get out of bed in the morning and do something but if you start doing it, it'll become easier, you just have to get into another routine.

 

You will get support, whether it comes from outside, friends, family or even within yourself and you will get through this, don't give up on yourself

[Apolodor]

Sorry to hear about your misfortune, but you took love for granted -- now you pay the price. Try to learn a lesson from this and move on, it seems that your relationship has been doomed for some time. Don't waste your time and money with shrinks, go out and try to get back into the dating scene. That's the best antidote for broken heart.

[GG3]

I really like this author's books. You can even write him and he will give you advice on his site. He did for me.

 

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