'Crazy' in love

[tigressA]

After so much back and forth since the break-up he told me a little while ago that he's having me forced out of the apartment as of Monday because "we're broken up and you shouldn't be using anything that's mine". This after we agreed (and when I say we I mean the building manager as well) I would take over the lease and keep his stuff for him until he came back.

 

Then he admitted he was only pulling all this manipulative, super-threatening and cruel B.S. in order to win me back. He reduced me to a puddle of panicked tears thinking I wouldn't have anywhere to go on such short notice, and expected this to make me want to run back to him. It's like "Return to me, or else." He said he feels like he's going crazy without me and he doesn't really know what he's doing. I told him his mental state post-break up is not my fault, and that hell would freeze over before I went back to him, particularly after he's pulled all this crap to make me feel chronically stressed out and threatened.

 

Now that he doesn't have me he is shoving threats in my face to have me kicked out within days and the internet cut off the next day, and interspersing this with giving me his account information for the internet/cable bill so I can pay it, and asking me to keep his stuff in the apartment until he comes back instead of putting it in storage and that I can keep whatever I want for myself.

 

I can't wait until the end of this month is over and my name is on that lease.

[CopingGal]

Geez, what a bastard. Sorry. Stay strong. Thank your lucky stars you are broken up with him.

Edited April 20, 2012 by CopingGal

[tigressA]

I am a little afraid of him at this point. I can't trust anything he says because he's gone from one side to the other so many times. He hasn't acted on any of his threats, but he has said these things in order to scare me and get me to come running back to him. He wants to control me and thinks he can manipulate me into loving him again. I left work early today because I am feeling so stressed. I nearly broke into sobs while on a call. I hardly slept at all, I kept having nightmares and waking up and crying.

[whichwayisup]

Holy cow! He is unbalanced right now. Get a friend to stay with you for a few days..

 

I hope he straightens himself up and stops making threats. If he continues, tell him you're going to go talk to the police about this and ask for a restraining order.

 

is your family close by?

[Mr Scorpio]

He wants to control me and thinks he can manipulate me into loving him again. I left work early today because I am feeling so stressed. I nearly broke into sobs while on a call. I hardly slept at all, I kept having nightmares and waking up and crying.

 

He might think he can, but he can't, because you are stronger than that. After your name is on the lease and this ordeal is over with, you will be even stronger yet. Hang in there.

[threebyfate]

Also discuss with your landlord that you'd like the locks changed ASAP. If the landlord is reluctant prior to the end of the month, you can offer to sign the lease in advance, post-dating the date.

[Highness]

OR how about you stand on your own two feet for once and get your own place no mater how difficult. You're old enough to own your situation. Stop feeding his ego, walk away. You wont, you've had plenty of chances and you continue to feed the drama.

 

Its annoying because you'e capable of so much more.

[tigressA]

I didn't see all these responses until just now. Thanks to everyone who's posted so far.

 

I haven't heard from him since Saturday night. He was getting ready to leave for Tibet...don't know why he's going there. I guess to think stuff over or something. I shouldn't have even answered the phone. I am only really answering him because it may be important, like apartment-type stuff. He said he should probably be back by the end of next month. When we talked that night he sounded...better. Still forlorn and all but no more threats.

 

I have decided to put in for a new unit in the building and go with that if there is one available that I can afford. The manager said I don't have to worry about my ex's things since they're not my responsibility; if he fails to deal with them then that's on him and not me. I am going to take the high road, however, and see about getting his things put into storage.

 

TBF, I think that's a good idea, changing the locks--if I don't get a different unit, that is. If there are no other units available then I will see about getting the locks on this one changed.