davisc123 Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 I've not been on here for a while now. But I wanted to post one last time, a small message of hope for everyone going through the pain of heartache right now. LS has been a haven for me, whether posting or just checking in to read others stories at my lowest point it has helped me to realise I'm not alone. So thankyou. Being dumped by the one you love, regardless of the circumstances, is a cruel psychological blow to anybody. It strips you of everything, and leaves you feeling lost and scared. Your brain plays tricks on you, you will question yourself over things you have done, or haven't done. All of a sudden your ex is the most beautiful, precious thing to have ever walked the planet. You will feel as though you can't do better, you have reached the dizziest heights and that nothing will ever match it again. The fear of pain will make you chase them, try to manipulate them and change their minds. Of course, you are wrong. Please, please, please take my advice and meet that fear head on by cutting them out of your life. It will take enormous courage, but you will thank yourself one day when you look back and realise how wrong you were. It doesn't matter if your ex has made up their mind or whether they are confused and sending you mixed signals. Either way, take the initiative and leave them alone. You will hit incredible lows, and when you think you've felt worse than was ever possible you will slide some more. But don't question it, that is the natural process, and if you allow yourself the chance to heal you will eventually. Remember, there is no magic wand. No tested remedy. Just be kind to yourself and grieve. You are worth so much more than hanging on the coat tails of somebody. And whatever you do, don't do anything stupid. Take that from someone who seriously considered doing some terrible things and is now so glad he didn't, not to mention ashamed. Life is full of opportunity. Sure, you are scared of being lonely now but when you get through this you will be proud to stand alone again. Before somebody worthy snaps you up. It will happen. I never dreamed it could. I was wrong. Take care of yourselves. x Link to post Share on other sites
No_hope Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 Great advice =]! I completely agree. It's been a little over 3 months, and I have healed. 2 1/2 months of depression, wait loss, blaming, begging, pleading. I am finally out doing me. everything will get better! I can't wait till I am at a year so they wont even cross my mind. Link to post Share on other sites
smudge21 Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 Very nice to read, many thanks. It's so true that following a break up, the ex becomes the most amazing person in the world and there is no other and never will be. I'm on my second week of NC and I still think of her as the greatest person I've ever met... but I also know that a previous ex many years ago was also the greatest person I ever met and I got past that, so I know I'll get past this. Letting go is the hardest thing in the world to ever do, but eventually you realise it's also the best thing to do. Link to post Share on other sites
clumsiest Posted April 7, 2011 Share Posted April 7, 2011 Thanks for posting, davis. I'm close to a year, but I post-poned my pain by not sticking to NC. I seriously should have done that in the beginning. I guess it will be some time for me. I hope I will be where you are... Link to post Share on other sites
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