Olivexx Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 It's always such a temptation to break the NC rule. I mean, no contact means NO contact, right? And I see that all the advice here on LS pretty much saying that the golden rule is to not break NC. However, for many of us, we want to go on NC to get our ex to contact us first. So logically, our ex would have to break NC. Or imagine it in this way, if we are wondering if our ex will contact us through the NC period, then essentially our ex would be wondering the same thing, right? So my question is this: Who should be the one to break NC? In my opinion, I think if you are the dumpee, you shouldn't break NC because your ex broke up with you. Therefore you should respect their space and give them time to think. That way, when they are comfortable to talk to you, they will reach out. Right? If you are the Dumper, then you should be the one to break NC because it was your decision to break off the relationship. What do you think? NC is hard when you miss them terribly. Link to post Share on other sites
Layzie89 Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 Have you read Gators guide to NC? I believe you can find all the answers to your questions in his thread. I would link it but im typing this from my phone, just use the searxh function and it will pop up. Best of luck to you brother Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 When you don't miss them terribly. Going NC is not like holding your breath underwater, even if it may feel like that to begin with. It's more like quitting smoking. You have an addiction. You really crave this thing that has caused you harm. You take each day, one at a time, and the cravings get less and less. After about 3 months, your physical addiction can be over. Now you're left with the psychological addiction. Once you no longer harbour any strong, hard feelings such as crazy love or crazy fear, your psychological addiction is over. You are both by then free agents or embarking on new romantic relationships, and can see each other as human beings who formed part of each other's lives at some time in the past, but fundamentally you don't have a grip on each other. You are free. Link to post Share on other sites
Kic Posted March 17, 2011 Share Posted March 17, 2011 OP, you are correct in that the ball is in the dumper's court. Better to just keep it severed. When you're in a new relationship, you'll find that your new significant other would frown on you remaining in contact with your ex (unless children are involved). Link to post Share on other sites
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