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A dear friend

Coping Learning to deal with one's emotions and loss.

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Old 18th August 2008, 4:03 AM   #1
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A dear friend

I have a dear male friend. (He calls me sis and is a friend of my brothers hence the sis part) along with many lads that I know from my local social club.

He has just recently split up with his wife about 3 wks ago. He has asked me if i want to go for a meal with him, drinks etc, as company.

Maybe its just me reading too much into it, and needs a friend but not sure weither to go for the meal or not???
My booty is not his call
carrie3107 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 18th August 2008, 11:20 AM   #2
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Meal but perhaps no drinks?

No real can go as a friend and if he cross's any boundaries then you enforce them. Or just avoid the situation...but then what kind of friend are you?

Tough call indeed
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Old 18th August 2008, 12:29 PM   #3
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Every once in a while, throw in some reference to your "sibling" relationship; talk about guys in whom you are interested; say how glad you are to be able to fulfill your "sister" role during his challenging time...anything that'll help to keep your relationship in its proper perspective.

Yes, there is potential for the current, normal and nice relationship dynamics to go sideways, depending on his own coping skills and strategies -- it is an idea to keep a small eye and ear out, for that. I guess the trick is to find a balance between being properly cautious and just plain paranoid?

But. It is also normal for him to be looking for comfort and support from his "sis". At some point, you may want to suggest an in-person divorce support group or singles' help ensure that you do not become his sole or primary support "network".
"Good or benign intentions do not provide a defence." ~ Tony Wong, Reporter
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Old 18th August 2008, 1:53 PM   #4
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why not go. he probale just wants a trusted friend to talk his troubles to. guys have a tough time doing this with male friends.if he over steps his bounderies.tell him,or leave.
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Old 18th August 2008, 3:29 PM   #5
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I don't see anything wrong with it. This guy is hurting and probably just needs someone to talk to.
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