VSgirl Posted June 19, 2019 Share Posted June 19, 2019 (edited) I wrote a thread a few weeks ago about my ex on here. We went through a lot together and as people discussed with me he was unstable and seemed to be bipolar. He did things like strand me and my mom at a restaurant on my birthday but was very sweet at times too. Anyway, we have been broken up about two months and I wasn't able to get my stuff until a couple of weeks ago. It was upsetting and I didn't really say much to him. I didn't think he seemed that happy..was in a grungy tank top. Hell, he still had our easter baskets we had gotten each other on the table and had eaten most of my candy. He'd left junk food wrappers around, seemed down and depressed. And as I mentioned in my other post, my mom worked with one of his coworkers and she told her he had lost his job after our breakup. I've been having some difficulty dealing with the breakup but trying to focus on self reflection and reading some books, journaling etc. I had tried to online date, but nothing serious has come from it. Anyway, when we broke up I didn't delete my ex as I normally do for an ex from my facebook. He was the one that took our relationship down, but left us as friends. I figured it would be okay, because he never seems to be on facebook...doesn't really have friends as I mentioned in my other posts. Well he's been on facebook lately. First, a few days ago he posted about my favorite sports team. He's never made sports posts before on there and a few friends agreed he was trying to get my attention, but I didn't say anything to him. Well yesterday he posted he was in a relationship with someone. To say I was shocked was an understatement. He still has my name on netflix, he still had my easter basket on his table etc. I was hurt and angry. It isn't typical of me to criticize other women, but since he had made hurtful manipulative comments to me about me "gaining weight"(I haven't been more than 5 pounds different up or down in the last year, although he gained some weight and I was supportive) and "aging" (We all are and I am often told I look younger than my age if anything)...well this girl is 4 years older than both of us and looks it. She won't show a pic of her body below the chest on her facebook and I can tell she weighs significantly more than I do. Again, I'm not the judge, but why would he want to be with her over me and wouldn't he be making these types of comments to her? I cannot tell if he is trying to throw this in my face or not. I'm wondering if this is just a rebound. I mean we were living together and planning a future. And this is a guy who was drinking and depressed after our breakup and who had just lost his job. He also has the baggage others have mentioned..why would he have such an easy time finding someone? Edited June 19, 2019 by VSgirl extra info Link to post Share on other sites
GTR King Posted June 19, 2019 Share Posted June 19, 2019 Your ex thought about breaking up with you way before he actually did and probably liked this girl for quite some time, How long was you with your ex for?? If he is posting things on facebook e.g your fave sports team or something you like, then he is trying to wind you up. Best to go NC Delete him off everything even his number thats the best way to heal/get over him Link to post Share on other sites
Highndry Posted June 19, 2019 Share Posted June 19, 2019 I don't think it's very hard to find somebody these days given all of the online dating sites, but the old saying "the odds are good but the goods are odd" oftentimes holds true. He's found a replacement who has a weight problem so she might not measure up to you in that regard. And, there's nothing to say she won't see the true him shortly and bail out. Link to post Share on other sites
Author VSgirl Posted June 19, 2019 Author Share Posted June 19, 2019 My ex and I were together total about a year. We were living together when he broke up with me and planning marriage and kids, all that. He broke up with me initially in september over a minor fight. I went full no contact and he begged me in november to go back with him. I waited a week and then talked things over with him. He admitted he had been stressed about other stuff like his credit card bill (not from me) but that his grandma paid off his whole bill (red flag) and he felt better about things. He broke up again this April after a minor fight about money. I had been home from for a couple months due to a knee injury and had just gotten my master's degree in december. I was worried about money and he was helping me out a little. I had offered to pay him back and he was like, no we are together for the long term we help each other out. I guess i should have gotten out of the relationship when I heard he got an engaged to his ex because his mom got her a ring and she and her daughter "felt it was time" and he went along with it. I was there for him, dealt with his bipolar actions like crying about his childhood..boohoo you are taking money from the same grandma that you said neglected you. We shall see if she is there for him like that! To my knowledge the girl is totally new (was a new friend on his facebook and from a city over an hour away). I have been no contact the entire time and will stay that way. I do feel like he is trying to get my attention because of him never wanting to be on facebook before with the sports team thing. Also him staring me down when I got my things. Link to post Share on other sites
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