linzartrax Posted June 11, 2018 Posted June 11, 2018 (edited) I met someone in Feb. He left in April to go be where he thought he wanted to be; but he says maybe not the best idea, the city is bad, the work is bad, he misses me, we're connected and that we are friends, maybe nothing more. We were casually involved, but knew there was a deep connection. We exchanged I love you pretty quickly, not even on a romantic level, but just this intense connection. This man has been through a lot and I am fascinated by his mind and his story. We agreed we were put in each other's lives for some reason. To learn from each other to help each other. I am learning how to love again, to be myself with someone and to trust others. Since April, we have carried on through text and 2-3 hour phone calls once or twice a week. Confiding, consoling, listening, laughing and learning more about each other. I became very attached to this, to him. I began to think about him all the time. Wondering when he would call or text. Making myself NOT text him. Becoming a little head over heels with someone that was 1,000 miles away and I had only known for 3 months. I was trying to keep some balance, but he kept coming back to talk and the more we talked, the more invested I became. He's a bit lost at the moment, not happy with his situation, probably slightly depressed and confused as to his next move. When I ask if he's coming back to my city, he always says maybe. I'm here for the foreseeable future because I have a great living situation, job and life for the first time in a few years. I started to get anxious and nervous and impatient and acting out of a place of fear and selfishness, I told him it wasn't working for me. I can't carry on a long distance relationship (my last one was long distance) again. I want to see him, be with him. He was confused, bummed out. I explained I was falling in love. He couldn't speak to that, but said he knew what we had was special and that I was the person he talked to the most. I explained that I will still be here, but I needed some space and time to figure things out. I worry about him. I want to know he's OK. But I think space is the best, but I don't know if I communicated that well. Worried he thinks I hate him or that he has done something wrong. What can I do in the mean time? I want to give some silence and time and see where he's at in a few weeks, but I also want to tell him that things are OK and that I still love him. I'm confused. I feel like I left a friend out in the cold when he needed me the most. I don't think he had many decent friends in this new city, or at least people that are trying to improve themselves like he is. Edited June 11, 2018 by linzartrax
d0nnivain Posted June 11, 2018 Posted June 11, 2018 You put your cards on the table: no LDR. He hasn't (can't or won't) commit to returning to your city. There are no good reasons for you to move to him. So this is just one of those things that circumstances caused to fail. Accept that it wasn't meant to be & find somebody local to date.
preraph Posted June 11, 2018 Posted June 11, 2018 You need to date other people and go out socializing with friends and move your life forward.
Recommended Posts