dazedandconfused17 Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 I had given my ex $2300 to pay for his rent twice. He has currently only given me 1000 of this from him in the past but he has not paid me anything since the break up. Do I have a right to contact him in order to get my money back? It's a tricky situation because I really don't want to speak to him but it is a large amount of money or should I just let it go and let it be? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 You can ask. But unless you have a writing signed by him acknowledging the debt, you are SOL. He will claim that it was gift. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author dazedandconfused17 Posted March 1, 2016 Author Share Posted March 1, 2016 You can ask. But unless you have a writing signed by him acknowledging the debt, you are SOL. He will claim that it was gift. I wish..I really should have done that but all I have is his words telling me "I would never leave you high and dry like that" I guess lesson learned :/ 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Blanco Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 I had given my ex $2300 to pay for his rent twice. He has currently only given me 1000 of this from him in the past but he has not paid me anything since the break up. Do I have a right to contact him in order to get my money back? You'd know the answer if you'd ever seen an episode of Judge Judy. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 I had given my ex $2300 to pay for his rent twice. He has currently only given me 1000 of this from him in the past but he has not paid me anything since the break up. Do I have a right to contact him in order to get my money back? It's a tricky situation because I really don't want to speak to him but it is a large amount of money or should I just let it go and let it be? You can ask him whatever you want. If he's unwilling to pay you then take him to small claims court. Do you have a cancelled check as proof you gave him the $2300.? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author dazedandconfused17 Posted March 1, 2016 Author Share Posted March 1, 2016 You can ask him whatever you want. If he's unwilling to pay you then take him to small claims court. Do you have a cancelled check as proof you gave him the $2300.? I have proof of the money that I gave him but not a canceled check. Would the canceled check be required? I'm not too familiar with the laws regarding something like this Link to post Share on other sites
Blanco Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 If you have nothing in writing about the loan, don't bother pursuing anything. He can claim it was a gift (aka every defendant's claim on Judge Judy) and the court will rule in his favor if you have no writing to dispute it was otherwise. It's a nice chunk of money, but it sounds like it'll just be an expensive lesson. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dazedandconfused17 Posted March 1, 2016 Author Share Posted March 1, 2016 If you have nothing in writing about the loan, don't bother pursuing anything. He can claim it was a gift (aka every defendant's claim on Judge Judy) and the court will rule in his favor if you have no writing to dispute it was otherwise. It's a nice chunk of money, but it sounds like it'll just be an expensive lesson. Thank you for the reply but yes I feel like you are right. I should have gotten some written agreement from him but I really never thought he would be capable of never paying me back but then again this leads to many different things as well so I might just have to leave it alone and like you said..lesson learned Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 Have you asked him a few times since the break up to pay the $1300 balance back? If not and you feel that you can handle the conversation at this point, then trying calling and tell him you would appreciate the remaining money back that he borrowed. If he didn't ask you for the money and you did not say that I will lend you the money, then yes, it can be taken as a gift to him, but if there were specific words like "borrow" or "lend" then you might as well ask him for it, if not, leave it alone, especially if it was a bad break up. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dazedandconfused17 Posted March 1, 2016 Author Share Posted March 1, 2016 Have you asked him a few times since the break up to pay the $1300 balance back? If not and you feel that you can handle the conversation at this point, then trying calling and tell him you would appreciate the remaining money back that he borrowed. If he didn't ask you for the money and you did not say that I will lend you the money, then yes, it can be taken as a gift to him, but if there were specific words like "borrow" or "lend" then you might as well ask him for it, if not, leave it alone, especially if it was a bad break up. Thank you for the reply. Yes I asked him for it twice back in January and it was a lend since he had paid me back only a tiny portion back and we always mentioned that he would pay me back but after we broke up he hasnt given me anything. Link to post Share on other sites
mightycpa Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 (edited) Definitely use the small claims court system. You probably don't need a written agreement. A loan is a contract, even if it is an oral one. A check would be best, but if you can somehow prove that he got the money, you definitely need to do that. If you can somehow prove that he spent it on rent, even better, because it explains the purpose of the loan. If you are willing to testify that he said he'd pay you back and can demonstrate that he has already paid some of it back, and now that you've broken up, he's stopped paying, then that is probably more than enough to convince a judge that he owes you the money. Also, there is the idea of the boyfriend's unjust enrichment. A contract can be implied where one person gets something paid for by the other person and the other person expects to be paid back. Kind of a "reasonable person" standard. It's tricky, but such a legal principle does exist. It is unreasonable for him to assert it is a gift, because it is a lot of money to you. People who think $2300 is a lot of money don't go around giving other people gifts of that size for no reason. It might be different if it was $23, or if you are a multimillionaire, but it's not and you're not. It's small claims court - meant for regular people who do regular things. Don't be afraid to seek your money there. You don't have to have this nailed down in writing, and it doesn't need to be "beyond a reasonable doubt". You just need to get to 50.01% with the judge, and the case is yours. It probably won't be as nearly as difficult for you to win as you might think, or as others have led you to believe. Just get your evidence and your story together. Edited March 1, 2016 by mightycpa 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author dazedandconfused17 Posted March 1, 2016 Author Share Posted March 1, 2016 Definitely use the small claims court system. You probably don't need a written agreement. A loan is a contract, even if it is an oral one. A check would be best, but if you can somehow prove that he got the money, you definitely need to do that. If you can somehow prove that he spent it on rent, even better, because it explains the purpose of the loan. If you are willing to testify that he said he'd pay you back and can demonstrate that he has already paid some of it back, and now that you've broken up, he's stopped paying, then that is probably more than enough to convince a judge that he owes you the money. Also, there is the idea of the boyfriend's unjust enrichment. A contract can be implied where one person gets something paid for by the other person and the other person expects to be paid back. Kind of a "reasonable person" standard. It's tricky, but such a legal principle does exist. It is unreasonable for him to assert it is a gift, because it is a lot of money to you. People who think $2300 is a lot of money don't go around giving other people gifts of that size for no reason. It might be different if it was $23, or if you are a multimillionaire, but it's not and you're not. It's small claims court - meant for regular people who do regular things. Don't be afraid to seek your money there. You don't have to have this nailed down in writing, and it doesn't need to be "beyond a reasonable doubt". You just need to get to 50.01% with the judge, and the case is yours. It probably won't be as nearly as difficult for you to win as you might think, or as others have led you to believe. Just get your evidence and your story together. Thank you so much for your reply!! Yes I think this is what i'm going to have to do. I have sent him a text and fb message and he read my fb message but refuses to answer me in regards to the money. I texted him from my sisters phone and I unfriended him on facebook so also through her account but still no reply so he's really left me with no choice but to do as you mentioned. Thank you Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 I agree with the majority above, small claims court will be a waste of time, and you'll be throwing good money after bad. If you have no proof that it was a loan, it will simply be your word against his. However, that doesn't mean it's not an effective threat. You've asked for the money back twice now. You could try telling him that if you don't get it within 30 days, you will take him to small claims court to retrieve it. Then in 30 days, if you still don't have it, tell him you're taking him to court to get it back. The threat of that might just kick him into action to repay it. But if he's ever seen Judge Judy, he'll know you won't have a leg to stand on in court. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
PrettyEmily77 Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 If you have proof that he reimbursed you some of the money (a receipt or a bank statement), you have a chance in small courts - people don't normally pay back part of a gift... I think you should ask him anyway. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
AMJ Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 My friend took her ex boyfriend on Judge Judy and won! The loser raked up a large amount of credit card debt, and I think she'd also paid a lot of living expenses and bills. I took a moving company to small claims court a few years ago. It cost me no money at all- maybe $50-100? And I won my settlement as well. I'd take him to court, get your money back. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dazedandconfused17 Posted March 1, 2016 Author Share Posted March 1, 2016 My friend took her ex boyfriend on Judge Judy and won! The loser raked up a large amount of credit card debt, and I think she'd also paid a lot of living expenses and bills. I took a moving company to small claims court a few years ago. It cost me no money at all- maybe $50-100? And I won my settlement as well. I'd take him to court, get your money back. Hahah that is awesome! Yes after everyones advice I think that it is what I am going to do. I sent him a message last night so i'm giving him a few more hours to reply 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 I sent him a message last night so i'm giving him a few more hours to reply You may have to do more than just "send a message." You may have to send a certified and/or registered letter demanding the money. Make it concise and polite recapping the amounts, discussions, and dates. That way you have documentation of the request to present when/if you go to small claims court. Otherwise he could state that you never asked him for the money or that it was a gift. Document. Document. Document. Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted March 1, 2016 Share Posted March 1, 2016 If he doesn't respond you could pay a smallish fee for an attorney to send him a formal letter demanding your money. I agree - the fact that he paid some of it is evidence that he was supposed to pay you back. Link to post Share on other sites
SoThatHappened Posted March 2, 2016 Share Posted March 2, 2016 I agree. Inform him that you want your money back formally (certified letter, letter from an attorney). If you don't get anything out of him after that, I'd honestly chalk it up to lesson-learned and wash my hands of it. If you have feelings involved, I'd walk away. If you couldn't give a $8It less if he lived or died, honestly, I'd go after the money. Link to post Share on other sites
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