Full story and the end of my story(long)

[Thecondor1991]

So this will probably be the last update I may make ever again or at least for a long time. So something happened today that kind of brought my story to, what I would guess is, its end. So I figured after everything I’ve been through I would just go ahead and share my experience with this whole break up thing. I’m hoping that this can help some people deal with whatever they may be going through. I’m going to break this into parts so you can skip to which one may help you.

1. (A summary of my story) So my ex and I were friends for two years before getting together. During those two years I came to love her and her two kids more than I ever thought I could. We had a great friendship, We went everywhere together, marathoned Netflix shows, write little notes to eachother, wrestled, took her kids and my little brothers to water parks and playgrounds, I got her into different shows like Dexter, game of thrones, and the walking dead, and she got me into movies like lord of the rings. We told each other secrets that we would have never told anyone else, and just had a great time together. For those two years she became the one person I looked forward to hearing from every morning and night. I never thought we could ever get closer. We eventually did, after an amazing night we ended up confessing our love for each other and that's where our relationship began. We got even closer than we had been when we were just friends. We would often sit around and talk about getting our own place and what we would name our first kid. We would go on long walks at night holding hands and kissing every few steps. I would constantly tell her she was beautiful, and that I felt she was created to be with me(cheesy I know.) And the sex? It was playful, fun, and passionate, we even had a handshake we did afterwards(again cheesy I know) I had been with many girls before but this I realized was true love. For the next 2 1/2 years I not only became closer with her but her kids and her family as well. I began to look at her kids as my own. Their real dad was very emotionally detached and would rather sit at his house and play video games then come see his kids. I would spend many afternoons playing hide and seek with them in the park, teaching them to read and write, as well as teaching them stranger danger, and how to kick ass at video games. Her son started to even call me dad. He often told me I was his "Favorite super hero." Things couldn't have been better. She ended up being pregnant and I was on the fast track to being a father and was very scared and proud. Unfortunately we lost the baby. As tragic as this was I felt it made us even stronger. This would continue to be good for a long while...so what went wrong?

2. (Things start to go down hill.) Well unfortunately I lost my job due to the company going under I went from making a decent wage to making nothing at all. She told me constantly that it was no big deal and that I would find another job soon. She also ended up losing her job around the same time. So our dreams of getting our own place were put on hold until we both got back on our feet. I searched for jobs for months and was only able to find a seasonal, part time, position working at a grocery store. To make matters worse my car ended up having a lot of problems and became unusable, which meant I had to bike to work everyday. The hours I had been working were a bit hectic so I didn't have as much time to spend with my ex. However, I still made it a point to see her every night even if It was just for five minutes to give her a hug, a kiss, tell her I loved her, and to kiss the kids good night. I saved up a bit of money but I only worked there for three weeks so it wasn't enough to get my car fixed or move or anything like that. Instead I invested in some new dress clothes, shoes, and some stuff that would make looking for a new job easier. Right about this time my ex picked up a job at a gym. I was super happy for her, however it did make me feel a bit less than a man. So I pushed myself hard. real hard! I applied for 156 jobs in one week, I collected cans, plastic, and copper wire to exchange for a bit of pocket change, I went to interview, after interview, after interview, and it seemed no one would hire me. I began to get depressed. My ex would often come over and tell me about her day. She would tell me that all day long guys would be hitting on her and asking for her number, which was something I was very used to. My ex is very beautiful and she has an amazing body. But hearing that it was happening so frequently make me feel sick. So to recap a bit, I was jobless, had no car, no money, was going to a bunch of interviews on a daily basis but wasn't hearing back from them, my girlfriend had a new job where a bunch of great looking guys who worked out all day were hitting on her, and on top of all that because of how much she worked I rarely got to see her or the kids. It was at this point that I snapped.

3.(from bad to good to worse) So I fell into a deep deep depression. I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't enjoy the things I loved, and I had a hard time even looking my ex in the eyes because I just felt that I was lower than dirt and that anyone else in the whole world was better for her. To make matters worse I ended up getting stung by a scorpion, and I had to be off of my feet for two whole days, which meant any interview I had during those two days, I missed. As the days went by I talked to my ex less and less. The more I didn't talk to her the worse I felt. It was an endless cycle of pain, frustration and anxiety. My family even began to notice and my mom would constantly ask if there was anything she could do to help. There wasn't. There wasn't anything anyone could do. However, things took a turn for the better when I finally got an interview with a place very close to my house. I was finally able to think clearly and realized that with this job, I would start saving, get a new car, and then get back into school. Things finally started to look up, but the something awful happened. I came home one day and saw My ex and her ex outside talking(they didn't see me though). He was crying and she was crying. I couldn't figure out what was going on and to be honest I panicked a bit. I waited a couple of days for my ex to tell me what had happened but she didn't. During those two days my anxiety and stress came back. For the next week she had stopped texting me and had only come to see me once. She said it was because she was working a lot but I could see in her eyes it was something else. for a few days I thought about how I would approach her with how I was feeling but couldn't find a way. Finally it hit me. I would write her a little note like I used to when we were just friends. It would be a cute little way of finding information out while also showing her I still loved her just as much as I did then. So I wrote her a very long note and prepared to give it to her. Unfortunately I at the last minute I decided not to. I chickened out. Then I got angry with myself. So I sent her a long text telling her that I felt she had grown distant from me, and I didn't want to lose her. It took a couple hours but I got a long text back which basically said that the father of her two kids had come back after four years of kinda being in their lives, and wanted a second chance to be the right man for her and the right father for his kids. She explained to him that she had been dating me and that her son called me dad and all that, which I think made him cry. He begged for her to give him a second chance and she said she didn't know what to do. she said she couldn't just give up on me and let him back in her life. I got angry and said "Why would he want to come back into their lives after four years of barely even seeing them!" He said he had changed and was seeing things in a different way. So for the next few days we texted on and off and I tried to make sense of everything. I came home one day and found her crying outside of my door. I asked her why she was crying and she said " I just feel awful for putting you through all this crap." She said that she couldn't stay in the house she was in anymore because she couldn't afford it, and she knew that I didn't have the money or the transportation to help her and her kids. She said that her ex had offered her a place. This pissed me off to no end. Just the simple fact that she was really thinking about accepting his offer drove me crazy. So after about two or three days of talking about it, I had enough. I finally brought her to my house and made her choose. I said "If you truly love me then we can make this work. But I cant have you second guessing us. If you feel like going to live with your ex is really going to be the right move for you then whatever, but you need to make a choice!" She started bawling at this point, and told me she would go stay with him but would still be with me. She tried to tell me that it was for the kids and not her. That I was her "soulmate". I was done hearing that crap and said again "Make a damn choice!" She eventually said she needed to think about what was best for her kids and not her. So she said "I think we need to just let go." I was furious at this point and just silently pointed at my front door. She left crying.

4.(The emotional roller coaster) The day we broke up, I was furious. I punched two huge holes in my wall(which i fixed the next day.) I grabbed everything she ever gave me and trashed it. All the cute little letters, att the action figures and models, all the stuffed animals, all the shirts, everything got trashed. I was more Angry than I ever thought I could be. Anger that I never even knew I had inside of me. Then the anger just want away, and from that came the pain. I broke down. I cried loudly into a pillow for hours, I probably hadn't cried this much since I was a baby. I cried and cried until no more tears would even come out. It went on like this for a couple days. I would be super angry and then would cry. I felt alone, scared, and betrayed. I got angry and thought to myself "if someone really loves you how can they just break your heart like that. soulmates my ass." I held it all in until I felt that I would suffocate. I finally realized I needed to talk to someone about it. My mom was the first. You see I don't have to many friends and because my ex was my best friend I never found the need to make any. I told my mom about what happened and she said "It will be ok. I'm sure things will work out. She needs to figure out what it is she wants in life. Time heals all wounds." This was the first time in years that I had gone to my mom with any kind of problem. It made me feel weak. I then talked to my dad. He pretty much said the same thing. A friend from high school called me and asked if I wanted to go out with her for coffee. I accepted knowing that sitting in my room all day was not going to make anything better. I had an awful time. All I kept talking about was my ex and how she hurt me. Eventually I realized it wasn't fair for me to have my friend sitting there all night hearing my crap, so I called it a night. It was around this time that I found this website, and I made my first post hoping someone could tell me something to make the pain go away. I found out about Nc and decided to give it a try. The next day my brother decided to take me out to Golfland and to have a few drinks. I had a better time than I did the previous night, but still felt like crap. I couple days later I was awoken by a knock at my bedroom door, expecting it to be my mom, or one of my little brothers, I opened the door shocked to see my ex standing there looking very tired and very torn up. She was shaking and holding a note. She handed it to me and asked if I could just read it and write her back. I didn't say much but I told her I would read it. After she left I read the note. It basically said "I made a terrible mistake. I feel awful. This is whats best for my kids. I just want you in my life. Please don't let me go. one day we can be together just not now." I was confused. The note didn't make any sense. I wasn't sure if it was a get back together not or a note further cementing out break up. So I called her over and asked her what it meant. She said she was standing by her decision and just though she needed to tell me how much she loved me. By this point I realized I had broken Nc. I told her I wasn't going to play second fiddle to anyone and that while I wasn't happy about our break up, That I wouldn't be mean or spiteful to her or her kids. She asked if we could still talk from time to time and I agreed. I still felt like crap.

5.(The slip up and my realization) I continued to post on here frequently, letting people know what was going on in my life and giving people advice where I could, which helped a bit. But I still missed my best friend. I was having a harder time losing my best friend than my ex. She came over one day Just to say hello, and I invited her in for a cup of coffee. We talked and laughed and joked like we always had. We even wrestled for the remote at one point, the wrestling eventually led to us having sex. It was literally the best and most passionate sex I have ever had. She must have agreed because she was shaking for about three minutes after we had finished. Things felt right. The felt normal. I felt glad to just have her in my life, but a day or two later, I felt sick to my stomach and realized that the sex hadn't changed her mind. I was still alone and hurting and she was still going to live with her ex. I decided I was going to leave for a couple days, and visit my dad who lives in Cali. I decided that while I was gone I was going to clear my head and figure out somethings about my life. My ex wrote me a another very long letter that she wanted me to read while I was on the bus to Cali. The ride to Long beach was a long and lonely one. I read her letter and felt sick to my stomach. It basically said that she still wanted us to continue being friends and having passionate sex but not be together. I threw the letter away. I got a text from her while I was on the bus asking how the bus ride was. I didn't text back. Then I got another text from her while I was at my dads house. I didn't text back. While I was with my dad we talked a lot about my situation. After having several of these conversations I came to a realization. I loved her. I loved her with all my heart. I still lover her. But I'm done being hurt. It was time to start moving on. My trip to Cali did exactly what I had hoped it would do, and as I said goodbye to my dad and got on the bus, I found myself missing my dad and not my ex.

6.(returning home and new state of mind) I got home late last Sunday. I was told that my little brothers had gone out with my ex and her nephews(who are close friends of my brothers) I went up to my room and began unpacking and getting settled in. My brothers came home about two hours later and one of them had a note written on his arm. It said "Glad your home. Give me a call when you get the chance." I ignored it. The next few days went pretty well. I thought about her every now and then and got the urge to text her, but the urges went away quickly and I would just find something else to occupy my time. She came by one other time, but I told my brothers to tell her I was busy. NC was working like a charm I actually felt like I was moving on little by little day by day...

7.(That's all folks) A couple days ago her kids came to my door asking If I could take them to the park and play hide and seek with them(which is something I did all the time before my ex and I split) I told them I couldn't because I had a lot of work to do. They asked why I hadn't come by to see them or their mom, I wasn't sure how much their mom had told them so I just said it was hard to find time because of how much we both worked. After a hug and a kiss I sent them on their way, I felt awful. The next day(yesterday) I started my first day at my new job. I was very proud of myself and excited to be working again. When I got home I sat in my chair and realized that I wasn't as happy as I should be. I should have been feeling great. I started my job, In about three months I would have the money for a new car, and shortly after that I would be back in school. But I just wasn't happy. I realized that these were all things I wanted to share with my ex. I wanted her to be there for my first paycheck, I wanted her to be there when I graduated college, I wanted her to be the person in the passenger seat of my new car, but she wouldn't be. I ended up having a massive headache and falling asleep feeling terrible. This morning I felt a bit better and sat down to drink some coffee. As I sat there I heard a knock at the door. I answered the door expecting to see one of my brothers friends, but instead saw my ex's kids. They were crying and rubbing their eyes. I asked what was wrong. Her daughter said "we're moving today. Mommy says we wont see you as much anymore." This hit me like a ton of bricks. As I sat there and tried to make them feel better My ex came walking up. I looked at her but couldn't find any words to say. She said "I'm leaving today. I've been trying for the last couple of days to talk to you, but you haven't returned any of my calls or texts." I sat there still trying to find the words. She started crying and looked at me as if wanting me to try and stop her. I finally was able to say "well I guess this is it." It was literally the only thing I could think to say. The kids started crying louder. So I hugged them tightly. She asked "Do you think we can still see each other? We still haven't gone to Sun-splash, We could still do that. I don't see why we cant still do things together." I stopped her. I said "At this point I'm just not ready for that." She cried even more. I looked at the kids again and said " You guys gotta be strong for me. If you start to cry then I'll start to cry. You don't want to see me when I cry, I get all ugly and look like a droopy old man." I was trying my best to make them feel better. After a long hug and a big kiss on their foreheads I let them go. I looked to my ex and she gave me a really big hug and I stood there not hugging back. When she let go, I told her not to cry and that maybe someday things would be the way they were but I wasn't ready for that yet. I watched them drive away, and fought back the tears...

8.(What I've learned) I've learned that losing someone you care about is hard. I've learned that emotional pain is just as bad if not worse then physical pain. Break ups bring the absolute worse out in us. It makes us obsessive, sad, alone, angry, confused, hateful, and broken. I've learned that when we are alone we often seek advice from others, we seek out our family, our friends, we will even seek advice from a bunch of strangers on a forum. We do this in hopes that someone has some magic advice that will make the pain, the anger, and confusion just go way. I've learned that Nc isn't always what helps. That sometimes we need to speak to exes one last time. I've learned that sometimes we need to have sex with them one last time to see if you still feel for them. I've learned that everyone has a story, and everyone's story is worth hearing. Each of these stories can help others to understand that they aren't alone in their struggle. I've learned that life has ups and downs, and when you have those up moments, grab on to them, hold on to the people that made those moments great, and cherish every single one of those moments and never take them for granted. When you have those low moments, don't go it alone. If you have friends, ask them to help you, never be afraid to ask for help. If your like me and have no friends, turn to a bunch of strangers on a forum and just let it all out, chances are there is someone who is going through the same thing and would love to help you. After a break up, you may have to go Nc. If you feel you just cant get over the person, and that you cant be friends with them, the chances are you need to go Nc. Nc will give you the time and space you need to fix whats broken and give you time to think. I've learned a lot about myself during this experience. If your going through some crap just know your not alone.

9.(where do I go from here) Ok so this is it. You've made it to the end. I applaud you. I know this was long and probably depressing. apologies for that. So you may be wondering what I plan to do now. I mean I lost the love of my life, I lost the kids I looked at as my own, and now I wont even get to see them anymore. What can I possibly do...Well I'm going to keep working, I'm going to buy my car, I'm going to get back in school, I'm going to join a new MMA class, and I'm going to keep on pushing through the hard times. The hard times have not come to stay, they have come to pass. Im going to keep living and hope for the best. I love my ex with everything that I am, but I cant be with her right now. I'm going to keep working on myself becoming stronger, mentally, physically, emotionally, and financially. Who knows somewhere down the line maybe life will bring us back together and everything will be as it once was, or maybe I'll meet someone else and completely move on. The funny thing is, I'm really scared about what happens next, but Its also kind of exciting too. I'll continue to post on the site giving advice where I can, and I may do a update several months from now, just to let you guys know where I'm at, unless something HUGE happens, then I'll let you guys know. I just want to thank everyone who has listened, gave advice, and gave me feedback. I appreciate you all.

[sober and dry]

Oh man you almost got me all tearing... That's a cold, sad, hard story... Be strong and keep hanging in there!

[Thecondor1991]

Oh man you almost got me all tearing... That's a cold, sad, hard story... Be strong and keep hanging in there!

It is a hard one...But I will stay strong. Thank you.

[kasop]

Wow. Ive read some of your posts before but its nice to see the whole thing beginning to end. But really, this isnt the end.. you have a bright future ahead of you. Good luck with your journey. Thank you for the share.

[Thecondor1991]

Wow. Ive read some of your posts before but its nice to see the whole thing beginning to end. But really, this isnt the end.. you have a bright future ahead of you. Good luck with your journey. Thank you for the share.

Its going to be rough but I'll keep at it. Thanks for your support.

[Tuck]

Dude I'm so sorry. Just reading this makes my story seem like an absolute joke. All I can tell you is that life goes on, with or without the things you care about. All we can do as humans is move on. Also, time heals.

[Thecondor1991]

Dude I'm so sorry. Just reading this makes my story seem like an absolute joke. All I can tell you is that life goes on, with or without the things you care about. All we can do as humans is move on. Also, time heals.

No my friend, your story isn't a joke. No ones is. Your story is worth telling and its damn sure worth listening to. Time does heal. IT sometimes takes weeks, months or even years, but things do get better. Thank you for your kind words.

[iceteaguy]

You my friend are a strong person and I hope you find the peace you had before this whole situation.

[Thecondor1991]

You my friend are a strong person and I hope you find the peace you had before this whole situation.

Thank you very much. I appreciate that.

[AlwaysAKL]

I read your entire post and thank you for posting. Your post touched my heart and I can identify with some of what happened to you. You have brought me encouragement. I applaud your spirit in not being bitter and looking forward to your life, come what may. Stay strong and thank you!

[FistOfTheNorthStar]

Oh boy, this hit me right in the feels! My friend I swear you are a twin of mine to parallel, well in some ways.

Something VERY similar happened to me, where I fell in love with my ex and her kid started calling me Dad within 2 weeks of knowing me. It was an amazing bond. A big factor that had her reeling back to me when she felt indecisive was that her child saw me as their father. He did the same and said I love you everyday and for a very young kid looked up at me and told me I was his super hero. OH THE FEELS! There was also the time he pretended to be sick an entire day and waited until I got home from work just so he could play with me.

Just as similarly there was the standpoint where she became indecisive as to whether staying with me or living the lifestyle she wanted was best for her child. She too fought with herself and became very hesitant, but she never cried. Not for me. Not once did she ever cry. She DID cry when she decided to move aside the person whom she had left me for the first time a decision came up. This is one very potent lasting and painful scar upon my heart.

She ended up choosing the lifestyle she wanted and had said how could her child be happy if she was not happy and missed something inside of her. I fought, until the end where she told me it was best for me to leave because it would damage me to stay in the home we had gotten together.

Again, so similarly after hitting NC and ironically as they say once you forget... It comes RIGHT BACK, she called me. She wanted to know about how difficult it would be for me to be removed off her lease then she asked how I was feeling, angrily I scolded her by saying DOES IT REALLY MATTER? DO YOU REALLY CARE? in which she answered in a panicked tone, of course why wouldn't I care? I fell for this and we spoke for an hour, where I decided to ask if we could have sex one last time. BOY was that a mistake. Knowing well that she was with the other partner she left me for, she wore a dog collar around her neck, was completely bruised around her body and bitten as this is what she had wanted. My mask was there where it DID hurt me but I showed no emotion. The sex? So... dull and emotionless. Not what I wanted, I wanted to go out with a bang, and it was not the case.

The most painful part was when she spoke to me, she was cold and distant with me, blaming me for her lack of working before we broke up, then asking me if I could help her pay half of the bills and rent (I moved at the beginning of the month and paid that months rent) and then told me what I did in leaving within 2 hours of our almost 10 month relationship was cowardly in the eyes of her new partner and possibly scarring to her child. Like you amigo, I told her child to be strong and even at the worst of moments listen to momma because she loves you and I told him Dad has to go away papi but I love you. He haunts me everyday when I see cartoons or say childish things he would normally say. I am also afraid what his future will be with what she chose for him.

To this day I ask myself, should I help you when you told me to leave. Even with the promise that we would be there for each other if something were to happen, she promised me she would never leave me under any circumstance.

I too an on a path of my own, I work at the hospital and LOVE saving lives day in and day out. I am also working on school and looking forward to get into Medical School. I too ached to have her and her child next to me proud of all the progress I went through. Unfortunately I myself know this is the end of my fairy tale with her. Although in our normal sense we were "soulmates" her lifestyle showed us that she had a split side that was her true nature, which I associate with her being a Gemini hahaha. It sucks because her true being seem to have pushed the woman I had fallen in love with away. To me, she died. This is why I don't think I could ever be friends with her. Someone who became so cold and distant, not the beautiful nature bound woman I fell for.

Wow I haven't really cried since it happened but this is bringing tears and the feels up hahaha. It really REALLY reminded me of my situation and you're right, I came here looking for a magic that would help me rid of my demons and push the thoughts aside and I found something awesome.

I found someone who is so very close to my situation.

I feel guilty because in a way I posted my situation within your forum and sorry man.

You're awesome though hermano. Know that there are others going through almost the identical.

-F

[Thecondor1991]

I read your entire post and thank you for posting. Your post touched my heart and I can identify with some of what happened to you. You have brought me encouragement. I applaud your spirit in not being bitter and looking forward to your life, come what may. Stay strong and thank you!

I am very glad my story was able to help you in some way. I had a pretty rough day today, I missed her a lot, but after reading this my day just got a hell of a lot better.

[Thecondor1991]

Oh boy, this hit me right in the feels! My friend I swear you are a twin of mine to parallel, well in some ways.

Something VERY similar happened to me, where I fell in love with my ex and her kid started calling me Dad within 2 weeks of knowing me. It was an amazing bond. A big factor that had her reeling back to me when she felt indecisive was that her child saw me as their father. He did the same and said I love you everyday and for a very young kid looked up at me and told me I was his super hero. OH THE FEELS! There was also the time he pretended to be sick an entire day and waited until I got home from work just so he could play with me.

Just as similarly there was the standpoint where she became indecisive as to whether staying with me or living the lifestyle she wanted was best for her child. She too fought with herself and became very hesitant, but she never cried. Not for me. Not once did she ever cry. She DID cry when she decided to move aside the person whom she had left me for the first time a decision came up. This is one very potent lasting and painful scar upon my heart.

She ended up choosing the lifestyle she wanted and had said how could her child be happy if she was not happy and missed something inside of her. I fought, until the end where she told me it was best for me to leave because it would damage me to stay in the home we had gotten together.

Again, so similarly after hitting NC and ironically as they say once you forget... It comes RIGHT BACK, she called me. She wanted to know about how difficult it would be for me to be removed off her lease then she asked how I was feeling, angrily I scolded her by saying DOES IT REALLY MATTER? DO YOU REALLY CARE? in which she answered in a panicked tone, of course why wouldn't I care? I fell for this and we spoke for an hour, where I decided to ask if we could have sex one last time. BOY was that a mistake. Knowing well that she was with the other partner she left me for, she wore a dog collar around her neck, was completely bruised around her body and bitten as this is what she had wanted. My mask was there where it DID hurt me but I showed no emotion. The sex? So... dull and emotionless. Not what I wanted, I wanted to go out with a bang, and it was not the case.

The most painful part was when she spoke to me, she was cold and distant with me, blaming me for her lack of working before we broke up, then asking me if I could help her pay half of the bills and rent (I moved at the beginning of the month and paid that months rent) and then told me what I did in leaving within 2 hours of our almost 10 month relationship was cowardly in the eyes of her new partner and possibly scarring to her child. Like you amigo, I told her child to be strong and even at the worst of moments listen to momma because she loves you and I told him Dad has to go away papi but I love you. He haunts me everyday when I see cartoons or say childish things he would normally say. I am also afraid what his future will be with what she chose for him.

To this day I ask myself, should I help you when you told me to leave. Even with the promise that we would be there for each other if something were to happen, she promised me she would never leave me under any circumstance.

I too an on a path of my own, I work at the hospital and LOVE saving lives day in and day out. I am also working on school and looking forward to get into Medical School. I too ached to have her and her child next to me proud of all the progress I went through. Unfortunately I myself know this is the end of my fairy tale with her. Although in our normal sense we were "soulmates" her lifestyle showed us that she had a split side that was her true nature, which I associate with her being a Gemini hahaha. It sucks because her true being seem to have pushed the woman I had fallen in love with away. To me, she died. This is why I don't think I could ever be friends with her. Someone who became so cold and distant, not the beautiful nature bound woman I fell for.

Wow I haven't really cried since it happened but this is bringing tears and the feels up hahaha. It really REALLY reminded me of my situation and you're right, I came here looking for a magic that would help me rid of my demons and push the thoughts aside and I found something awesome.

I found someone who is so very close to my situation.

I feel guilty because in a way I posted my situation within your forum and sorry man.

You're awesome though hermano. Know that there are others going through almost the identical.

-F

Do not apologize. I am glad you shared your story with me. I'm glad I'm not the only person going through a similar situation, I am terribly sorry to hear about your loss. I know that a situation gets 100x worse when kids are involved. If you need to vent I am more than willing to be an ear.

[FistOfTheNorthStar]

No problem man. Right now I'm just torn with the memories, of them, but the pain of how it ended. She ended up breaking the necklace I gave her as an engagement, then gets collared. Although I don't feel pain it hurt me. Like i said she never cried for me.

[Thecondor1991]

No problem man. Right now I'm just torn with the memories, of them, but the pain of how it ended. She ended up breaking the necklace I gave her as an engagement, then gets collared. Although I don't feel pain it hurt me. Like i said she never cried for me.

I'm sorry she hurt you. You know I guess I'm just having a really hard time understanding the way love works...maybe it just me, but when I tell someone I love them, I dont just stop loving them, I could never lie to them, or cheat on them, or leave them for no reason. Maybe I got it wrong I dont know...

[Thecondor1991]

Man these last couple days have been rough. Hopefully today will be better.

[Thecondor1991]

I know I said I wasn't going to be updating but I honestly wasn't expecting to hear from her. So Yeah she messaged me on Facebook. I kept the conversation real short and straight to the point. anyway here is how it went. (note, I got her message right away but didnt respond for a whole day.)

 

(ex)Somebody at work told me I looked like Katy Perry tonight. I thought of you and thought you might laugh and disagree so I had to tell you.. oh and I'm not stalking you

(me)well Mrs Perry I hope the move has gone well.

(ex)Ohh thanks.. Honestly its been hard. I've wanted nothing but to be out of that house for years and now I am and Im glad but I have an empty feeling, sigh. But anyway.. Has anyone ever told you that you look like nick cannon? (inside joke we had)

(me)Empty feeling? I'm sorry to hear that. Yea I hear it less these days.

(ex)How has work been? (her son) wanted to call you today but my dad came over and stayed for a while. The longest visit I've got from him in a while.. It was nice.

(me)Works been good. Well thats good to hear.

(ex)Yeah..what are you doing up so late?

(me)Cant sleep. But I know you are probably tired from work, so I'll let you go.

(ex)ohh yeah me and (her daughter) are up watching bobs burgers..i do need to go to bed tho (her son) will be up early..

(me)Ok well tell the kids I said hi

(ex)paej says hi and she misses you.

(me)Miss her too. later.

 

so yeah that's how the conversation went...Yeah what do you guys think?