sharp357 Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Hey guys, I would really appreciate some advice here because I am so confused right now. If you've read any of my other threads you would know that my girlfriend broke up with me about 5 weeks ago. I still want her back and about a week and a half ago I got a text saying 'hope you're ok' so I replied saying 'Thanks, hope you're too'. Now a week later, we got matched on tinder (a dating app where you say if you like what the person looks like and if both of you say yes, then it allows you to talk). This took me by surprise big time. You could tell from her activity that since we were matched she spent the day going on and trying to check whether I had seen it. I left it a few days to see if it was a mistake and she was going to remove me from it, but she didn't. So I said 'well this was unexpected' to which she replied 'yeah...' The next day we had a small chat on it, few messages from each side just catching up, with a few in-jokes thrown in there. Then she just stopped replying. It's been over a day now and I can see she has been online since then multiple times, but just has decided not to reply. This has really thrown me off as it seemed like a big indicator she would be interested and trying again. I'm tired of waiting now and just want to know either way whether that's what this is about or if she was just playing games... Is it a sensible idea to send a message on it saying something like 'So I feel like we should acknowledge the elephant in the room... Why have we become a match on here?' Is this a good idea? Too pushy? I just need to know so if it is a game, I can remove her and get on with my life. Any advice would be so helpful right now! Link to post Share on other sites
ThorntonMelon Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 I don't really know how Tinder works, but I think it's safe to say you should be moving on with your life whether you are matched on some app or not. Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Tinder matches you based on location only, nothing else. Clicking you as a match and texting you is only dumpers remorse and you're allowing her to tug on your heart strings. There is no elephant in the room. There is only you holding on to something that is not there. The harsh truth is this - She is on Tinder matching with tons of other guys and chatting it up. Tinder is a hook up site. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sharp357 Posted October 1, 2014 Author Share Posted October 1, 2014 It just basically means that she saw me on it, and she purposely clicked it to see if I had done the same. If you do that, you can immediately remove the other person if you don't want them to see it. She didn't so she wanted me to know for some reason Link to post Share on other sites
Author sharp357 Posted October 1, 2014 Author Share Posted October 1, 2014 Tinder matches you based on location only, nothing else. Clicking you as a match and texting you is only dumpers remorse and you're allowing her to tug on your heart strings. There is no elephant in the room. There is only you holding on to something that is not there. The harsh truth is this - She is on Tinder matching with tons of other guys and chatting it up. Tinder is a hook up site. I know, it's just it does show exactly who the person and then you say yes or no so she knew it was me. I can't think of any other reason why she would say yes to me, knowing it's me Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 I just need to know so if it is a game, I can remove her and get on with my life. She ended with you 5 weeks ago. She's been lacklustre in her communication with you. She's on a hook-up site engaging with other men. Regardless of whether you know it's a game or not, all the above should be enough reason for you to remove her and get on with your life. Stop grasping at little bits of nothing and trying to make into something. Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 I know, it's just it does show exactly who the person and then you say yes or no so she knew it was me. I can't think of any other reason why she would say yes to me, knowing it's me The same reason she sent you a text asking if you were OK. Breadcrumbs. You should ignore them. Link to post Share on other sites
BroknHrt Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Just unmatch her. She can call you if she wants to talk. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sharp357 Posted October 1, 2014 Author Share Posted October 1, 2014 I guess you're right. I think I kind of convinced myself that I had to do something as it could be a last chance. I keep forgetting that she was the one who broke up with me, I shouldn't be doing the chasing here or holding onto false hope Link to post Share on other sites
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