suicidal thoughts

[Jordvn]

as the title says, yes, i've been having these thoughts. i'm suffering in silence. my ex was everything to me, i miss her so much. i pretend to my friends and family that i hate my ex for getting a restraining order on me, and they all bash her in front of me, telling me to find a new girl. if ppl only knew the truth, that i still love my ex, that i feel dead inside, and all hope is lost. the woman that i planned on marrying, starting a family with, hates my guts.. and its all because of a few drunk text msgs i sent. idk what to do anymore, i just want to apologize to her but i can't.

[Thomas the Red Fox]

I'm sure on the inside, they all know you feel that way. It's natural...

 

The pain you feel is normal. We have all felt suicidal, I think, at some dark points or another. I know I did. The important part is not actually doing it -- but rather realizing you're thinking this way, realize why that's a bad idea, and process it healthily.

 

I miss my ex, too. But it gets better. You have been granted a great incentive to remain 100% NC: the restraining order. A blessing in disguise...

 

You will heal faster than many.

[mtnbiker3000]

Well, first and foremost, no one is worth taking your own life over. I am truly sorry you feel this hurt, but just know... it will pass! Suicide will not!!

 

Second, if this is all over a couple of drunk texts, then what kind of person and RS did you really have to begin with??

 

Third, based on what you write here, you have some rather serious personal issues to work through that have nothing to do with your ex. I can say this because I am dealing with similar issues. If you have the means, I would suggest therapy! A good therapist can help a tremendous amount if you let them.

[Chi townD]

Listen to me and listen good. NO GIRL IS WORTH ENDING YOUR LIFE OVER! NOT ONE!!!!

 

 

You need to either go to the emergency room or see your family doctor right now. You need to talk to a professional about this stuff immediately. You probably need to be on antidepressants for a little bit and that's okay! It's okay to talk about these things and taking some medication to help you get through the rough times of your life.

 

 

Go now! Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

[samg313]

You are more important than this relationship, it does not define your whole life. I have been in love twice and yes it does take a while to get over but you have to live and learn from all this and come out better on the other side of it.

[STM206]

I can assure you that what you're feeling is not uncommon. The important thing is you seek out help, tell someone you're feeling this way... I can promise you that it gets better... Even 3 months down the road you'll look back and say "wow, how did I get to that place"?

 

You aren't alone... You loved someone and they vanished from your life, they cut the cord so to speak... Your mind is all over the place at the moment and your emotions are at an all time high.

 

I would advise you to seek out a therapist, it sounds like you're holding in a lot of emotion and no one should have to struggle alone.

 

You will get through this, I promise.

[Jordvn]

i just feel like my window is closing. before i know it, i'm going to be 30, alone. my ex said she would come back one day, she said this after the breakup. when we broke up in the past, she always came back! now i just pushed her too far. i really don't want to kill myself, but it seems like the only way to end my suffering. i just want to feel happiness again, by letting go, her coming back or someone new comes into my life.

[ConfusedHumanBeing]

i just feel like my window is closing. before i know it, i'm going to be 30, alone. my ex said she would come back one day, she said this after the breakup. when we broke up in the past, she always came back! now i just pushed her too far. i really don't want to kill myself, but it seems like the only way to end my suffering. i just want to feel happiness again, by letting go, her coming back or someone new comes into my life.

 

Might as well put you in a retirement home before you hit 30

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view4/1312016/steve-harvey-o.gif

 

It obviously sucks what you're going though, but you cant rely your happiness on others. Only YOU can make YOU happy. There is the lesson you can learn from this. Dont let others determine your worth.

 

You'll find it again I am 100 percent sure of this. As sure as the sun rises and sets. With that said, you have to heal and learn from this.

 

Keep doing what you're doing. It will get easier.

[STM206]

i just feel like my window is closing. before i know it, i'm going to be 30, alone. my ex said she would come back one day, she said this after the breakup. when we broke up in the past, she always came back! now i just pushed her too far. i really don't want to kill myself, but it seems like the only way to end my suffering. i just want to feel happiness again, by letting go, her coming back or someone new comes into my life.

 

I'm 28 and have dealt with the same thoughts "I'm going to be 30 and alone" but that's not the case if you don't allow it.

 

Try and start small, get outside and go for a walk, reconnect with friends and family... But importantly be honest with people... There's no shame in saying "I feel depressed and pretty ****ing awful right now"

 

When you have those thoughts, simply let them pass... Don't feed emotion into them, just let them be and say to yourself "I am worth it, I am worthy and finding someone to share my life with... But until then, all I've got is right now, and I'm going to make right now count!"

[d0nnivain]

Please don't kill yourself.

 

 

Your window isn't closing. I was 41 & DH was 36 when we married for the 1st time. Life does not end at 30.

 

 

hang tough. Watch your alcohol intake. You said you were drinking when you send the text messages that caused her to get a restraining order. Alcohol is a depressant. Drinking won't make you feel better.

 

 

Stop suffering in silence. Tell all those people who are bashing your EX that you are feeling suicidal. They love you & want to help you. Let them.

[Thomas the Red Fox]

You should look forward to your dating in your 30's. That's when it gets real I've heard from many, many people.

 

PS Don, what is DH? The acronym's are getting to be too much on this site.

[organizedchaos]

i just feel like my window is closing. before i know it, i'm going to be 30, alone. my ex said she would come back one day, she said this after the breakup. when we broke up in the past, she always came back! now i just pushed her too far. i really don't want to kill myself, but it seems like the only way to end my suffering. i just want to feel happiness again, by letting go, her coming back or someone new comes into my life.

 

Please, if the window is closing at 30, then it must be nailed shut for me at 42?!

[TaraMaiden]

I've just come back from a period of suspension (which I would say, in all honesty, I deserved).

 

I'm not about to do it again.

Suffice to say that suicide is not the ending of past demoralising and negative issues; it's the prevention of future promising and positive ones.

 

That's one damn-fool decision you will never live to regret.

 

Quit talking about suicide.

Because if you're really honest, if you really, REALLY felt that way - you would have already done it, without announcing it to the world.

 

It's a 'cry for help' and rightly so.

We're here to help.

 

Just quit this foolish talk, ok?

 

Hugs.

[d0nnivain]

PS Don, what is DH? The acronym's are getting to be too much on this site.

 

 

 

DH = dear or darling husband. That acronym is on many sites.

[KaliLove]

I'm afraid that if you really are struggling with suicidal thoughts, that may be beyond anything we can do for you on LS..though I am very glad you decided to post here instead of doing anything drastic. That means that you WANT to be talked out of it and it's unlikely that you'll actually do anything.

 

Please go to the hospital though, or at least call a doctor, because this is not normal. You desperately need psychological help (which is nothing to be ashamed of).

[Chi townD]

I don't know why you're posting on here dude. You should be at your Doctors office. Please, PLEASE!!! See someone.

 

 

You're still talking suicide (window closing and all...). I'll tell you what would happen if you did. You would upset a ton of people. Not only on here, but your friends and family. You would leave them with guilt for not seeing it sooner and you know what? Your Ex would probably show up at your funeral and she'll cry and be all upset. Then, after time passes, she'll move on with her life. Meet a guy and have a couple of kids. Nice house in the suburbs with a white picket fence and you would be nothing more than a memory to her. meanwhile, you're six feet under because you gave up on the kind of life she has.

 

 

Trust me, there's a girl out there for you that will share that nice little house in the suburbs and she'll give you a couple of kids. So, don't give up!

 

 

Please, seek help.

[Haydn]

If you kill yourself, do you think she would see you in a different light? I doubt it. Do as Chi says, get some help friend. Don`t keep it inside.

[KaliLove]

I don't know why you're posting on here dude. You should be at your Doctors office. Please, PLEASE!!! See someone.

 

 

You're still talking suicide (window closing and all...). I'll tell you what would happen if you did. You would upset a ton of people. Not only on here, but your friends and family. You would leave them with guilt for not seeing it sooner and you know what? Your Ex would probably show up at your funeral and she'll cry and be all upset. Then, after time passes, she'll move on with her life. Meet a guy and have a couple of kids. Nice house in the suburbs with a white picket fence and you would be nothing more than a memory to her. meanwhile, you're six feet under because you gave up on the kind of life she has.

 

 

Trust me, there's a girl out there for you that will share that nice little house in the suburbs and she'll give you a couple of kids. So, don't give up!

 

 

Please, seek help.

 

Better to post here than to do something irrational. He's posting here because he wants to be talked out of it.

 

OP, not sure what country you're in but the US suicide prevention site is suicidepreventionlineline.org

 

Please check it out, if nothing else.

[mtnbiker3000]

Please, if the window is closing at 30, then it must be nailed shut for me at 42?!

 

Yup me too!!! 42 and I'm fartin' dust

[mtnbiker3000]

OP - Look, life is challenging. For everyone at one time or another. And heartbreak is one of the worst possible. But, it's how you respond that's important. Don't let it incapacitate you. Rather, rise up, punch it in the face and shout F You!!!! That is the difference between the strong and the weak, not individual hardships...

[oracle]

You should look forward to your dating in your 30's. That's when it gets real I've heard from many, many people.

 

PS Don, what is DH? The acronym's are getting to be too much on this site.

 

 

Yea... REAL SH*TTY

[Jordvn]

You do this you prove to her that her opinion of you was right : douche bag looser coward I can get on and on about names she would call you and not drop one tear in sorrow.

You will hurt yourself for next 40 years break heart of your family and friends and at the end do nothing you still won't have her so what's with this self centered ME ME ME ME HURT selfishness ?

 

People have cancers babies die from fault at hearts young girls and boys would give anything not to be born with long life diseases and worse yet you are JUST 30 healthy and alive and you are tossing it like that ?

 

SHAME ON YOU you need to be little bit bitch slapped and then little bit ass kicked wake up and realize world did not end.

AND YOU LIED to us am sure of it as am sure sun is gonna come Tomorrow there is more to this story then you are telling I feel it in my gut and am very rarely wrong.

 

 

 

Get up your ass quit moaning and go to your family MD get some depressants

and start doing stuff working going out playing some sport.

You f.... up good with her she ain't coming back but world still exist will keep existing use this chance that has been denied to many and be grateful for that.

 

 

SHAME ON you if only some dead soldier mother can hear you or mother that lost her child to cancer husband wife to car accident or child mother for whatever reason.

 

 

Oh and yeah am heartless bitch to bad its not about me its about you

 

how about f*ck you? yeah you don't know my whole story, my girl leaving me is only half the pain i go through everyday. SHAME ON YOU for kicking a man while he's already down.

[hoping2heal]

Two things, maybe it will turn into three..Idk yet.

 

1. Don't deal with this on your own. Tell your friends, or at least one friend the truth of what is really going on. You're making something inherently painful, all the moreso by not opening up with your friend and trying to carry the load on your own and in your head. I think being honest with your friends will help you to feel less alone.

 

2. You can be single at 30, or you could have married this woman and be married at 30, and divorced by 33, 34 or so because the relationship wasn't going to work out. Be glad you found out it wasn't going to work before you married and had legal and further emotional detriment when the divorce hit.

 

In the wise words of Semisonic; "Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end".

[bojangles]

I just turned 30 a month ago, and I just got dumped 10 days ago. Should I off myself too? Life's too good otherwise to do so. No girl is worth harming yourself for and if you are thinking that way, you have more issues than woman problems. And there is nothing wrong with that but you need to tackle that before you get along with another person. No one can save you from your own misery except for you.

[TaraMaiden]

how about f*ck you? yeah you don't know my whole story, my girl leaving me is only half the pain i go through everyday. SHAME ON YOU for kicking a man while he's already down.

 

get a life.

 

Chill dude, bluegreen only tried to help you ok ? and gets this in return..... how rude are you?

 

Suicide is indeed the most selfish thing someone can do, think about your friends and family if you dont think about yourself so DON'T DO IT !

 

No no! 'Rude' is good!

'Rude' is angry!

Which means that all this talk about suicide is just emotional venting.

 

Jordvn has absolutely no intention whatsoever of committing suicide, and never did have.

But he IS hopping mad.

And touching a nerve like that shows he still has enough vigour in his veins to keep going.

So, that outburst is actually a point in his favour.

it shows he can still get agitated enough to go on the defence.

And no suicide potential ever goes on the defence.

They can't be asked.

 

Jordvn - CAN be asked.

That's a positive sign.

it's a sign he gives enough of a damn to keep fighting.