purplesoccer34 Posted March 12, 2014 Share Posted March 12, 2014 I went on a date with this guy and it seemed to have gone pretty well. After 2 hours of spending time together, he said that we should walk around a bit and it seemed like he didn't want to leave. At the end of the date, he even said twice that we should meet again. I wasn't so sure then if I wanted to meet him again, because he seemed to be so much more mature than me. But I thought about it for a day, and decided that if he wanted to meet again, I would go for it. However, the next day he texts me saying that we are at completely different stages in our lives and that it wouldn't work. I guess he's right, because I'm in my early 20s, and he's 5 years older than me. But could that really mean he had no interest at all? I was surprised to hear that especially since he said at the end of the date that he wanted to meet up again. Link to post Share on other sites
forgetmenot75 Posted March 12, 2014 Share Posted March 12, 2014 He might be looking for reassurance, since you didn't give you the hints that you indeed wanted to meet him again. What for he contacted you? If he's not interested, he could have made the disappearance act and that was all, but instead, he contacted you. Anyways, very weird behavior, let him go now, he seems bad news. Link to post Share on other sites
Author purplesoccer34 Posted March 12, 2014 Author Share Posted March 12, 2014 He might be looking for reassurance, since you didn't give you the hints that you indeed wanted to meet him again. What for he contacted you? If he's not interested, he could have made the disappearance act and that was all, but instead, he contacted you. Anyways, very weird behavior, let him go now, he seems bad news. Oh actually just to clarify, I texted him the day after saying I hope he had fun and thanks for the dinner. I didn't mention anything about meeting him again, but his reply to my text was that it wouldn't work out. Link to post Share on other sites
mtnbiker3000 Posted March 12, 2014 Share Posted March 12, 2014 IMO, a girl in early 20's and a guy 5 years older is pretty damn close to the 'same stages of life' 2 Link to post Share on other sites
David87 Posted March 12, 2014 Share Posted March 12, 2014 This guy is making excuses because like mtnbiker3000 said you are not far apart with the life stages. Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted March 12, 2014 Share Posted March 12, 2014 This guy is making excuses because like mtnbiker3000 said you are not far apart with the life stages. While I usually agree with most things of that nature, I will play the devils advocate on this. If this was a one date type thing and you guys went out and did whatever, he could get a quick grasp on who you were. Maturity levels and what each person wants out of life are completely different. Being as you are in your early 20's and this person is 5 years ahead, though its only 5 years, you can be on TOTALLY different life stages. The 20's is when you start molding your adulthood and what you want. Being early 20's, all I wanted to do was party and drink. At 23, I was all about having a good time, dating around, and letting life come to me. Now that I am 28, I hardly go to any parties or drink. I want stability, a career job, stuff for my house, etc. I'm WAY different than I was in my early 20's than my late 20's. Since it was the first date, I dont see why he would have any reason to lie to you. Maybe you are actually on different levels, but it doesnt mean that there is something wrong with you. I'm sure he cared, but he is probably looking for something that you are not. That's why people date right? I'm sorry it happened, but just try and move on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
David87 Posted March 12, 2014 Share Posted March 12, 2014 While I usually agree with most things of that nature, I will play the devils advocate on this. If this was a one date type thing and you guys went out and did whatever, he could get a quick grasp on who you were. Maturity levels and what each person wants out of life are completely different. Being as you are in your early 20's and this person is 5 years ahead, though its only 5 years, you can be on TOTALLY different life stages. The 20's is when you start molding your adulthood and what you want. Being early 20's, all I wanted to do was party and drink. At 23, I was all about having a good time, dating around, and letting life come to me. Now that I am 28, I hardly go to any parties or drink. I want stability, a career job, stuff for my house, etc. I'm WAY different than I was in my early 20's than my late 20's. Since it was the first date, I dont see why he would have any reason to lie to you. Maybe you are actually on different levels, but it doesnt mean that there is something wrong with you. I'm sure he cared, but he is probably looking for something that you are not. That's why people date right? I'm sorry it happened, but just try and move on. ConfusedHumanBeing I totally agree with you, but we are talking about a second date here, not engagement, mariage or a life commitment. He never put the effort to know the girl. I have female friends that are married at 22 and have kids. I still think he makes excuses. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted March 12, 2014 Share Posted March 12, 2014 ConfusedHumanBeing I totally agree with you, but we are talking about a second date here, not engagement, mariage or a life commitment. He never put the effort to know the girl. I have female friends that are married at 22 and have kids. I still think he makes excuses. No I totally get it. I understand what you're saying...maybe he saw something that was a red flag for him. I don't know if an excuse is what it is or an actual legitimate reason....but, either way OP, I woudlnt let it get to you at all. I highly doubt it was something that you did wrong. Probably something he didnt feel compatible with or maybe he is dating to try and get over a previous ex. I HATE those dates lol. Stay strong. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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