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How long did your honeymoon phase last? How did it turn sour? How did things end?


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wildsunandmoon

Unfortunately, our honeymoon period only late for 3 months. It was beautiful at first. We felt so deeply connected with each other and said things that were of an intimate nature. He said he loved me first and then I followed after.

 

The moment things became sour for us is when we had three arguments close to each other in the 3rd month. He broke up with me the first time after I discovered that he and his ex-girlfriend (who he "loved") exchanged "harmless" messages with each other on Facebook. He suddenly short-circuited, started thinking of his ex-girlfriend, compared me to her and things were never the same again. Even after he came back to me. We stayed together 8 months after that. We officially broke up two weeks after he got out of rehab for a heroin relapse. He ended things with me. He said he needed to get his life together and he couldn't give me the fun I wanted. He left me after showing him how much I loved him through all we went through.

 

I found out that on the same day we broke up, he messaged his ex-girlfriend before me. He also admitted to his friend that at first he broke up with me because he wanted to get himself together. Then he realized he didn't love me the way I loved him.

 

A few unpleasant things followed right after. He started an online dating account. Tried hooking up with another girl at a party. Said, "It's noble being in a relationship with someone you're not attracted to, right?"

 

Yes, things certainly turned sour.

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Honeymoon phases...a term used in the cycle of abuse. The vary. At first they are long...then over time they become faster and faster. Do you really even want to be in such a cycle? A drug user who cheats ? Don't you want someone who treats you with love and respect? The saddest thing about some of us women is, we are ALLOWING this to happen. A relationship is a voluntary thing. You do not have to put up with this crap ! (Unless you choose to...then I guess you cant complain...right?) You chose it ! We all have to take responsibility firstly for how we react to others. If your choice is to put up with it... then you are allowing the behavior.

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The honeymoon phase is the beginning of the relationship At least for me, that's when I'm so in love / lust that I give up things like sleep & doing laundry. I forget to grocery shop etc. I spend every free moment with the other person.

 

 

Then real life jumps in & I have to do mundane things. It doesn't mean the relationship is over. It just means that it's time to put some less than fairy tale aspects into it. You can't spend the rest of your life staring dreamily into the other person's eyes. At some point you have to make dinner & go to work.

 

 

If you are arguing in the 3rd month, the relationship was already on shaky ground.

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