MoveAlong Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 I haven't posted in a while, but I figured I would come on here to share what's going on. You can read my previous posts for more detail, but basically 3 year BU over 11 weeks ago? I've maintained nc since BU. I actually don't know how long it's been! Anyways, I came on here to share the following: NC is the way to go Why? I spent time being sad and useless but I did some things to work on myself. I realized some goals and am pursuing them. While I have been doing my own thing, my ex has been contacting me. She texted me again, again, an again. It's been another few texts since I last shared. The Christmas text, the lonely miss you essay, and more recently, another bread crumb. Anyways, By doing NOTHING, I've done everything. I thought NC was nonsense...but it works. I'm not here to inspire people to commit to NC to win back their ex, but rather to share my experience. For me, I'm still thinking about whether or not I want to reach out. If she doesn't blow up my phone, I won't reach out. And even then, I will need to hear her out. Days will be ****ty but we will all make it through. I owe this community so much for all the support and advice I received and needed. Seriously, thanks!! 1
lostsoul4286 Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 I needed to hear this, I actually almost broke NC today. Only been a week since we last spoke and she didn't want to take me back. 1
Am4Real Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 You cannot break "no contact"; NC is an unbreakable commitment you make for a variety of reasons, mostly stemming from a commitment to yourself and to heal. If you are considering making contact or returning contact, that's fine, it’s your choice and for your reasons, but it's not "no contact", it's simply a "quiet time" after the termination of the relationship and although this may seem like a play on words, there is most definitely a hard line of definition between the two states. If you truly believe in yourself, if you believe in healing, if you believe the relationship is gone, then and only then can you believe in the commitment of NC, otherwise you are uncommitted and simply living in silence until an urge takes over your willpower. Make sense to you? So, are you committed or just being silent for the time being? I needed to hear this, I actually almost broke NC today. Only been a week since we last spoke and she didn't want to take me back. 3
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