Has anyone ever dumped or been dumped within a month of being together?

[Lolita_Sky]

This is the very first time this has happened to me. My most recent ex broke it off through text a month and a half into our relationship. It was sudden and still does not make any sense. I don't think about why he did it because even if I got the answer it still wouldn't make a difference. Any way has anyone experienced being dumped a month in the relationship? Now mind you I'm an adult, my ex is an adult...obviously a very immature one. I feel like I was going through some highschool teen breakup because it happened so randomly and in such short a time. I truly thought we were going to last. Sjo have you? And are there things I can do to avoid this happening again?

[Joaquin]

In the absence of anything concrete I'd guess he met someone else or just wasn't that into it.

 

Some people also fake their level of interest. And 6 weeks very much the early get to know each other phase.

 

Nothing you can do. Chalk it up and get back out there.

[Lolita_Sky]

No he was very much interested. We talked about everything. He even took out the time to meet my family. A guy who isn't interested wouldn't do that. I believe he got back with his ex. It is what it is though. Lol

[Joaquin]

The ex factor brings more info to the situation, but it doesn't change the end result.

 

I suppose u could learn not throw to much in if an ex is in the picture or he'd recently broken up. Ive learned this the hard way myself, and it was longer than 6 weeks.

 

Be glad u didn't invest more of yourself if that was in fact the case.

[Lolita_Sky]

The ex factor brings more info to the situation, but it doesn't change the end result.

 

I suppose u could learn not throw to much in if an ex is in the picture or he'd recently broken up. Ive learned this the hard way myself, and it was longer than 6 weeks.

 

Be glad u didn't invest more of yourself if that was in fact the case.

Yeah, definitely.

[chinacat sunflower]

That happened to me. It was the most intense relationship I have ever been in, and I'm still in the process of getting over it. He has well broke up with me via text during a fight we were having.

 

I really don't have any advice to give you, just be yourself. If that is how he was going to end things with you....be grateful the relationship didn't go on any longer, because it would have gotten worse. I hope this helps a little, good luck.

[flitzanu]

yes. a month is nothing, that's barely time to get to know someone, and time to decide if they want to stay or pursue other options.

 

just means he didn't feel compatible so he left.

[Lolita_Sky]

Wow. It may not be nothing for you but it was for me. We talked about EVERYTHING. He told me how he had surgery to have one of his testicles that he was born with on the wrobg part of his body removed and placed where its suppose to be. Who openly shares something very personal like that? We would stay up late at night talking about things in general some times. How were we not compatible? He even told me I was the perfect girlfriend. For you to have the nerve to say just being together with a month of COMMITTMENT is nothing and is okay for him to break up with me to date another woman is okay? Because we were only together for a month, when he asked ME out and swore to me that I was a wonderful girlfriend and I gave him the things his ex didn't? Its men like you that screw with women's emotions. That's bullsh*t.

[flitzanu]

Wow. It may not be nothing for you but it was for me. We talked about EVERYTHING. He told me how he had surgery to have one of his testicles that he was born with on the wrobg part of his body removed and placed where its suppose to be. Who openly shares something very personal like that? We would stay up late at night talking about things in general some times. How were we not compatible? He even told me I was the perfect girlfriend. For you to have the nerve to say just being together with a month of COMMITTMENT is nothing and is okay for him to break up with me to date another woman is okay? Because we were only together for a month, when he asked ME out and swore to me that I was a wonderful girlfriend and I gave him the things his ex didn't? Its men like you that screw with women's emotions. That's bullsh*t.

 

 

if he was committed and wanted to be with you, he would be with you. how is that belittling and trickery?

 

point is, be glad it was ONLY a month and not YEARS before he dumped you "for no reason".

Edited June 9, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Lolita_Sky]

if he was committed and wanted to be with you, he would be with you. how is that belittling and trickery?

 

point is, be glad it was ONLY a month and iot YEARS before he dumped you "for no reason".

 

YOU do not know the truth. I know what he did, and how he did it. It was wrong and he played me for a fool. I didn't go into the details about it because I already posted it in another thread about the details. All I aske was what could I do to prevent this from happening again. I am well aware he lost interest in me at some point. Its clear in the fact that he broke it off with me. I don't need you restating that fact when I am already hurt from it.

Edited June 9, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[adb22]

Yeah...I dated someone for like a month and a half..and he saw that he unhid his profile on the dating site that we met on, I called him out, and we broke up. That was 3 months ago, and I'm still not over it...probably because it was my first relationship.

 

And as far as the content of other people's post, they may be correct with some of the things they say, but the phrasing isn't always the most gentle. Some people just aren't that sensitive and comforting when it comes to this stuff. If it bothers you, try to just ignore it...I would.

[scorpio1978]

This happened to me one month into to something. He swept me off my feet, but then he said he wasn't feeling a "spark" and that with other women in the past, he felt things with them. Guys know pretty early on if it's something they want and he didn't. Come to find out later down the road, he wanted to get back with his ex. When he told me the truth (after he came back around), I was furious! I beat myself up for months wondering what happened and why I wasn't good enough (common thing I do after break-ups) and to find out it had nothing to do with me afterall was so infuriating. I let him have it! I told him he would never have an opportunity to fool me again. I was crushed. But, the truth is, you never know why this really happens. People are good actors. Maybe he was forcing feelings, maybe there is someone else, etc. Don't waste time trying to understand it. I am doing it now with another situation after 2 months of being with someone and its exhausting.

[daddylongleg]

I think you need to not take it so personally, and realize that it could have happened for a million reasons, many of which have nothing to do with you.

 

I'm very open. I'll talk about anything with anyone, but that doesn't mean I feel particularly close to them.

 

I dated a girl for a few weeks. I talked about my previous relationship with her. I talked about my family. I told her several times that I really liked her, which I did. But, at some point, I realized that I wasn't ready for a relationship, and if I let things go any farther, I was going to end up hurting her. So, I just sort of severed contact with her. I didn't ignore her or anything, but I think she sensed that I was no longer interested. That's just the way it goes.

 

Being abandoned or rejected sucks. There's nothing you can do about it but move forward. You're lucky that you're able to feel such strong connections with other people. I'm sure you'll find someone who feels it too.

[Lolita_Sky]

I think you need to not take it so personally, and realize that it could have happened for a million reasons, many of which have nothing to do with you.

 

I'm very open. I'll talk about anything with anyone, but that doesn't mean I feel particularly close to them.

 

I dated a girl for a few weeks. I talked about my previous relationship with her. I talked about my family. I told her several times that I really liked her, which I did. But, at some point, I realized that I wasn't ready for a relationship, and if I let things go any farther, I was going to end up hurting her. So, I just sort of severed contact with her. I didn't ignore her or anything, but I think she sensed that I was no longer interested. That's just the way it goes.

 

Being abandoned or rejected sucks. There's nothing you can do about it but move forward. You're lucky that you're able to feel such strong connections with other people. I'm sure you'll find someone who feels it too.

Well I think he got back with an ex or with someone he's known a while. Because he told me that truly felt that he could fall inlove with me and have a meaningful relationship with me. He even told me that he's told me things he hasn't told anyone else. He told me that he wouldn't just tell anyone that. He has told me on numerous occasions that he cared a lot about me. I dunno, I just feel like it wasn't me in the relationship. I feel that it had to do with him. I truly think he went back to his ex because he told me she contacted him a little over a month ago around the time we got together. I should have been concerned then when he told me but he said he just ignored her. He never had any complaints and said I was the perfect girlfriend.

 

Also the reason why I took it so personally is the manner in which he broke it off with me. He did it in such a cold and uncaring way. He slept with another woman the very same day we broke up. So I know that it was just another woman. For him to do that shows to me that everything he told me was a lie. So that's why I took it so personally. I was furious. I never did anything to him. So yeah, that's why it still hurts.

Edited June 9, 2013 by Lolita_Sky

[scorpio1978]

You may very well be the perfect girlfriend in the sense have everything that a person SHOULD want in a woman, but there are times when you just cannot force feelings of love. It's like a recipe. You have all the ingredients, do everything you're supposed to do, but for some reason, it just doesn't come out right. I know, terrible analogy, really, but I cannot explain it any further than that. I have met amazing people and they have all that I want but there is just something off about it. He might have gotten back with his ex. He may have realized with you, that he had history and stronger feelings with her, but he may also not be seeing anyone and just needs time away from dating. Point is, is could be a number of different things. You need to just move on and live the best you can. I don't want to give false hope, but if you leave it nicely with him, he might come back at some point or might think a month is enough time to know that it just wasn't right. You've very beautiful and if some guy said you're the perfect GF, then you obviously have great qualities, but don't get wrapped up on things like what actions he took to make you think it was serious or too much he said. You cannot understand everyone.

[scorpio1978]

Well I think he got back with an ex or with someone he's known a while. Because he told me that truly felt that he could fall inlove with me and have a meaningful relationship with me. He even told me that he's told me things he hasn't told anyone else. He told me that he wouldn't just tell anyone that. He has told me on numerous occasions that he cared a lot about me. I dunno, I just feel like it wasn't me in the relationship. I feel that it had to do with him. I truly think he went back to his ex because he told me she contacted him a little over a month ago around the time we got together. I should have been concerned then when he told me but he said he just ignored her. He never had any complaints and said I was the perfect girlfriend.

 

Also the reason why I took it so personally is the manner in which he broke it off with me. He did it in such a cold and uncaring way. He slept with another woman the very same day we broke up. So I know that it was just another woman. For him to do that shows to me that everything he told me was a lie. So that's why I took it so personally. I was furious. I never did anything to him. So yeah, that's why it still hurts.

 

 

Sorry, I didn't read he part about sleeping with another woman the same day. WHAAAT?! Oh, hell no!! Nix everything. You do not want someone like that. Absolutely not!! You may be the perfect GF but he is looking for the perfect hook-up. Nope! I would be furious too. But, he doesn't get it. And will continue to lie to others or mislead them. It's not personal at all. He seems to have an agenda and it isn't what youre looking for. Be thankful, please that he left

[Lolita_Sky]

Sorry, I didn't read he part about sleeping with another woman the same day. WHAAAT?! Oh, hell no!! Nix everything. You do not want someone like that. Absolutely not!! You may be the perfect GF but he is looking for the perfect hook-up. Nope! I would be furious too. But, he doesn't get it. And will continue to lie to others or mislead them. It's not personal at all. He seems to have an agenda and it isn't what youre looking for. Be thankful, please that he left

 

Yeah, that's why I was so furious when I found out. I gave him so many opportunities to leave. He told me time after time that there was no one else. I told him that I don't do the whole friends with benefits relationship. I am worried that he may have been sleeping with other women while with me. He swore that he wasn't cheating. I don't know why he kept me around like he did. I dunno, but I am greatful. I just wished I could have seen this coming from the beginning. This is how diseases are spread. Because men like him constantly lie and cheat. I TOLD him that if he didn't want to be in a relationship to let me know and I'd be fine with it. He insisted that he did. Then he goes and do this. But everything happens for a reason. Its certainly a huge eye opener to me to be a whole lot more cautious of who I date.