Freaking ex... s?

[RastaBrownie]

Hi! This is kinda my story from the last few months. I started at a new school, and in my class there was this girl. I was always interested, but I never felt I had a chance, but then I thought, why the h*ll not, and I started hanging out with her. Now things were going quite well, and I was very happy. Though when the time came that I asked her where our relationship was, she could not answer. We did never go official, because she said she couldn't give me an answer, though she could make out with me and cuddle infront of the whole school, and she could sleep with me. I did a dumb thing though, I told her I would wait for her, and I now know it was a stupid thing to say and do, because I would always ask if she had given it any more thought, but she'd just shake her head and say no. And as time went by, nothing more happened, we'd act as a couple, but when people asked we would not answer. Now here comes the sketchy part: She was still talking about her ex-boyfriend, and talking to him. She knew I didn't like it, so she hid it at first, but after a while she became more open towards me about talking to him. Though I didn't conscern much, because I didn't know it to be such a big problem. More time went by and she came home with me to meet my parents. Things were going quite well, and I was happy. Then one weekend, I asked her to meet me in her town, and she said she didn't have the time, and she didn't answer my messages. At that point I reconsidered the whole relationship and decided to end it. And so i did. Then the same day I did, I called her in the night and told her i regret my decision, and we got back together kinda, but the day after I was told she went to see her ex. Did I mention that he lives in Sweden and me and her in Norway? Well that is the thing. I didn't get mad, because she assured me that they were only friends and that nothing had happened. Then some time later she told me she only wanted to be friends. Then we agreed to become ff's, but suddenly it all came back, it was like she never said we were only friends. I got confused. But I thought I would just give it time. And so I did. Later it was brought up, and we found out we were more then friends, but she didn't know what she wanted. Then later she did the same, told me she just wanted to be friends, and that she couldn't go between two guys. I got quite upset, though I didn't show it to her very much. But things seemed to go my way, since we met up, and she would hold my hand when we walked around the mall and such. But one day I got a phone call from her best-friend, that had become a very close friend to me, she said that she was getting back with her ex. Now, she went from "I don't know who to chose.." to "He's only a friend to me, but I don't think he feels it that way.." In like two days, that is what our mutual friend told me. She and her ex had been together for 6months, then had broken up 5months before me and here started dating. but she had talked to him on a regular basis. The tricky thing is she is in my class, and I see her everyday. I was annoyed at first and ignored her, but then one day I suddenly started being polite, as if she were an aquaintance. She got confused, and had told my best friend that she didn't know what to do, that I seemed so happy. Then a couple of days ago she had written this to my best friend: "Hey.. I'm sorry to bring this up, but do you know if ... is still angry at me? or if he wants anything to do with me at all?" he answered: I don't think he is angry, I think he only sees you as a classmate, that's what he told me anyways." Then she wrote: "I'm just f**king tired of this whole thing.. Miss the old times.." and he replied: "yeah, it was pretty awesome." then she followed with: "yeah.. it was.." Me, my best friend, her and another good friend were a gang while me and her was together.. I have tried really hard to move on this past month.. But today, I realized that I am still waiting for her.. putting all other women on hold for her.. Because I really really did like her alot, and I miss her alot, and she keeps watching me all the time. Now I know this could never have worked at first, because I was the needy guy, and he was the guy that she hadn't gotten over, though, this could be her way of finishing with him, because everyone knows it won't last. It didn't before, and it won't now, so is there anything I can do to get her back? Or do something at all..

[darkmoon]

do a bit of each, waiting by being ok with her, like you are acting now, ok and pleasant, and also enjoying life for its own sake, away from classes perhaps, which will inevitably put some new pretty girl/s in your field of vision, go for walks maybe

 

she might come back, it's her call, but atmo, let her figure out who she is this girl in class, she's very young yet in her mind to-ing-and fro-ing over relationships, who she is suited to - she's a dithering teenager immature

 

there's one last thing, please don't be the guy who sends her dramatic "i'm always here for you" begging letters, yes begging/prostrating yourself like a doormat, i've never seen them work,hang onto your sanity, my friend, and get out more - but away from classes and this stifling situation

 

but amuse her and you by being cordial in class

Edited January 26, 2013 by darkmoon