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Is my ex/ girlfriend psychotic?


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Hey LSers, I'm hung up on a few little bits and pieces of my relationship when I look at it from hindsight. I was wondering if you guys and gals could shed some light on whether or not my girlfriend was emotionally unstable and basically a lost cause -- no matter if I was James Bond or the best man in the world.

 

I've told my story in various ways on this site but I want to just cut down to describing her and receiving your opinions on whether or not she's a lost cause, at least until she matures: I started dating this (I thought) very sweet, cute, and charming girl. I pursued her, but found out she had a boyfriend. Upon inspection, this girl (attractive) was dating this very ugly, weird guy. I asked her politely why and she said he's nice. A few days later, she dumps him and tells me that she's free (I ignored her). We start a relationship, and she is about as clingy, needy, and desperate as one could get, and I found it both endearing and repulsive at the same time. She always texted first, and always wanted to see me and gave up a lot of herself for me... she gave up her friends, her family, hobbies, etc. even when I specifically encouraged her not to. She would say things like: "We're going to be together forever, right?" and "Why are you with me you're so gorgeous...why are you dating me?" She would point out other attractive girls and ask me what I thought, and it would piss me off because she never saw herself as worthy. She wouldn't accept gifts or compliments (she would shake her head or mockingly say "thank you."

 

Mind you, all of the above was done in a sweet and syrupy way, but I was losing myself, and found myself unhappy with life for some reason. The minute I shed her, I felt like a weight had been lifted, despite me missing her (she did become my best friend).

 

I found out some of her past history: she cheated on a nice guy in 2011 that she was dating for 3 months who was in her circle of friends with a scumbag, and stayed with the scumbag for 5 months despite horrible physical abuse and emotional abuse from him. She's a walking doormat and when I asked her, "Why did you stay with him?" She said that because she cheated on the nice guy, she felt like that's all she deserved. Very apathetic. She seemed to feel guilty about cheating, but justified it very well.

 

She had anorexia when she was 12 for a few years, which possibly makes it so that she can't have children.

 

At the end of our relationship, I believe she got GIGS (she turned 20) and lost feelings for me and attached them to a new, really bad guy. She left me and cheated on me with this new guy. Despite me catching her talking about having sex with him, she lied about it and continues to to this day (although I've been NC for awhile and plan on keeping it).

 

It was shocking to have someone who says they care about you so much and for so long do something of this nature... even to the last day she was still texting me sweet nothings, but as I would find out later, she was also texting her new guy terribly gross, sexual, and out of characteristic things on the same day.

 

Now, I'm not the perfect man. Sometimes I made her jealous (because I thought that she found my jokes funny, she would laugh) and sometimes I would make inappropriate racist jokes (I'm now dating a girl who loves them) and we had different viewpoints on a lot of issues, but I treated her very well overall and supported her and NEVER said a bad word about her or to her face. She even admits that. And now she's with a real bad guy who's getting her into drugs and partying, etc.

 

Did I dodge a bullet?

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notice the pattern in the guys she's attracted to? sounds like you're not one of them.

 

so many people love the devils they know, not the devils they don't.

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