Jump to content

Giving my ex her stuff back... in person or through a friend?

drakewrites

By drakewrites
in Breaks and Breaking Up

 Share
While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

drakewrites Established Member

drakewrites

Posted
Posted

I posted a long thread a few days ago, but I guess since it was so long nobody replied to it, haha. So I'm going to try to post a much shorter version here. Here's the long version, if anybody is interested: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/coping/344770-i-shouldnt-feel-much-pain-after-less-than-2-week-relationship

 

I had this mad crush on a girl that I worked with. I guess I became very infatuated with her for several months before I even spoke with her. I guess over time I sort of put her on a pedestal, made her to be perfect in my mind, I think.

 

We become acquaintances, and for a little while we were on and off friends. Then a few weeks ago we become VERY close friends, just for a few days before she came to me telling me she liked me. I was shocked. This girl that I was madly crushing on liked me? I was ecstatic.

 

SO ecstatic, I didn't care that she still loved one of her exes. Usually I would never be with someone that cared so much for an ex still, but I lost my sanity for a bit. We started going out, and had sex that night. We both said we usually didn't go that fast, and of course she asked me if we shouldn't go too fast, etc, but of course I was like, "Nahhhh! We are fine. :)" I was just happy to be with this girl so much.

 

For 2 weeks we dated, and hung out so much. I was afraid she'd like someone else, forget about me, so I saw her every chance I got. We made love a lot, spent a ton of time each other, every day. Then she went out of town, and we got into our big, first fight. We both acted immature, but she didn't want to try again. I asked a few times, and every time she said she just needed space. I've realized that she is ten times handling this really short break up then I am. I was really torn up for the first few days, and it still hurts from time to time. For her, I guess because her feelings weren't as real as mine, she doesn't hurt as much as I do.

 

She came back to town today, and she lives just a few houses down from me. I have some of her stuff, and she wants it back. I'm dreading seeing her, because I don't know what I will say. I don't want her back, but I also do. I just want her to want me, again. I feel like I had the perfect girl I dreamed about for months in my arms, and then I lost it. I don’t' know if I should see her again to give her her stuff, or just give it to a mutual friend we have to give it to her. What should I do?

CC12 Established Member

CC12

Posted
Posted

Tell her you'll put her stuff on your front porch or whatever, and to ring the doorbell if she wants to talk to you. Leave it up to her.

beyond Established Member

beyond

Posted
Posted
I posted a long thread a few days ago, but I guess since it was so long nobody replied to it, haha. So I'm going to try to post a much shorter version here. Here's the long version, if anybody is interested: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/coping/344770-i-shouldnt-feel-much-pain-after-less-than-2-week-relationship

 

I had this mad crush on a girl that I worked with. I guess I became very infatuated with her for several months before I even spoke with her. I guess over time I sort of put her on a pedestal, made her to be perfect in my mind, I think.

 

We become acquaintances, and for a little while we were on and off friends. Then a few weeks ago we become VERY close friends, just for a few days before she came to me telling me she liked me. I was shocked. This girl that I was madly crushing on liked me? I was ecstatic.

 

SO ecstatic, I didn't care that she still loved one of her exes. Usually I would never be with someone that cared so much for an ex still, but I lost my sanity for a bit. We started going out, and had sex that night. We both said we usually didn't go that fast, and of course she asked me if we shouldn't go too fast, etc, but of course I was like, "Nahhhh! We are fine. :)" I was just happy to be with this girl so much.

 

For 2 weeks we dated, and hung out so much. I was afraid she'd like someone else, forget about me, so I saw her every chance I got. We made love a lot, spent a ton of time each other, every day. Then she went out of town, and we got into our big, first fight. We both acted immature, but she didn't want to try again. I asked a few times, and every time she said she just needed space. I've realized that she is ten times handling this really short break up then I am. I was really torn up for the first few days, and it still hurts from time to time. For her, I guess because her feelings weren't as real as mine, she doesn't hurt as much as I do.

 

She came back to town today, and she lives just a few houses down from me. I have some of her stuff, and she wants it back. I'm dreading seeing her, because I don't know what I will say. I don't want her back, but I also do. I just want her to want me, again. I feel like I had the perfect girl I dreamed about for months in my arms, and then I lost it. I don’t' know if I should see her again to give her her stuff, or just give it to a mutual friend we have to give it to her. What should I do?

 

She still loves her ex.

 

She has asked for space.

 

She has said she doesn't want to try again.

 

Hard though it is, she has told you all the answers to your questions.

 

Arrange to give her her stuff back through the mutual friend.

 

xx

MW93i Member

MW93i

Posted
Posted

I'm meeting my EX to get my things back. It's going to be nothing more than 'Thank you' and 'Bye' doesnt need to be anything more or anything less.

  • Author
drakewrites Established Member

drakewrites

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Alright. Thanks guys. I'll just give it to a mutual friend, then. I'd leave it on her doorstep, but some of it is personal stuff.

 

Should I ignore her texts, as well? I have a feeling she wants to 'keep my around'. She says she wants to be friends, and seems offended when I say I can't talk to her because I have to get over her. I already blocked her on FaceBook and she was like, "WTF aren't we friends?" I was like, "Um...".

steveblack Established Member

steveblack

Posted
Posted

Drop off, leave it at the house, don't meet in person

beyond Established Member

beyond

Posted
Posted
Alright. Thanks guys. I'll just give it to a mutual friend, then. I'd leave it on her doorstep, but some of it is personal stuff.

 

Should I ignore her texts, as well? I have a feeling she wants to 'keep my around'. She says she wants to be friends, and seems offended when I say I can't talk to her because I have to get over her. I already blocked her on FaceBook and she was like, "WTF aren't we friends?" I was like, "Um...".

 

Drake, think you need to 'man up'.

You have told her you can't talk because you have to get over her - stick to that.

If she is offended, that's not your problem.

xx

  • Like 4
TaraMaiden Established Member

TaraMaiden

Posted
Posted

Read the "All-New Caliguy No Contact Guide" in my signature.

it explains why friendship is absolutely impossible as things stand.....

Get with it, go with it, stick with it.

  • Like 1
  • Author
drakewrites Established Member

drakewrites

Posted
  • Author
Posted
Read the "All-New Caliguy No Contact Guide" in my signature.

it explains why friendship is absolutely impossible as things stand.....

Get with it, go with it, stick with it.

 

Thanks so much! Holy crap that thread was awesome. Just read it twice. That's EXACTLY what I needed to read. Passing it along to all my friends suffering from heartache as well. Seriously, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. Going to give her stuff to a friend and tell them to pass it along to her. Thank you. So much.

TaraMaiden Established Member

TaraMaiden

Posted
Posted

No problem. Glad it helped. :)

 

Any questions, don't hesitate to ask. ;)

beyond Established Member

beyond

Posted
Posted

That thread is great isn't it.

 

Best wishes to you

 

xx

 Share
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...