lostangel39 Posted March 1, 2004 Share Posted March 1, 2004 my fiance broke off our engagement and broke up with me because he said we argued to much and he had doubts and did not trust me im so devastated because he broke up with me over the phone and will not see me face to face i have gone to his apt and he would not answer the door he is 38 and i am 39 our relationship was for 8 months i love him very much and want him back please does anyone have any ideas on how to get him to see me? and how can i get him back? thankyou Link to post Share on other sites
louisemc Posted March 1, 2004 Share Posted March 1, 2004 I am sorry about your fiance leaving you. The best way to get someone back is not to chase them. Try to do other things to keep yourself occupied. If you give him some space he might eventually miss you and come back. By the way, do you have children? Most men don't want to take on another man's children. Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted March 1, 2004 Share Posted March 1, 2004 Even though he is handling this in a less than mature manner.....IF he had ANY doubts at all, he was wise to break off the engagement. No one should enter into a marriage with doubt in their heart. Chances are....the arguing is NOT the main reason. It was only a red flag of something else wrong with the relationship. His lack of wanting to talk it out with you is a good sign he is not ready AT THIS TIME to repair or reconciliate the relationship. As hard as it is, these things happen.....and usually for good reason. All you can do is give it time to see if he contacts you. If he doesn't contact you within a reasonable period of time.....probably the best thing would be to move on. I HATE 'broken' hearts....I'm so sorry!!! Link to post Share on other sites
fancypants Posted March 1, 2004 Share Posted March 1, 2004 Yikes! Sounds like he got cold feet! You have only been together for about 8 months. That is not a very long time. When was the wedding supposed to be taking place? I am very young, and have learned very fast that when a guy wants out they make up just about any kind of excuse to get out. I had one guy tell me he could not afford me. We only went out for about 5 dates, and then he called me one day and told me he could not afford me. I belive no more than $14 was spent every get together. So this might just be an excuse. Give him some time to miss you, and maybe he will relize what he is missing out on. in the mean time find things to do with your time, and don't pester him. If he truly loves you he will come around. Good luck to you! Link to post Share on other sites
overseas2004 Posted March 2, 2004 Share Posted March 2, 2004 I am a firm believer that when people love each other and that love exists they will gravitate back to each other. It takes some people longer than others. I think you should totally leave him alone. First because it may cause him to come back. And second because if it doesn't it will give you time to heal. My ex broke up with me about a month ago. I called him twice asking him back. We even saw each other once But I could tell that every phone call was just driving him away more. Particularly because I was never calm during these phone calls. I stopped contact about two weeks ago. and it is killing me literally killing me. But then my girlfriend saw him on the street and he said he had broken up with me and that he was thinking about what to do. He still hasn't called but it has accomplished two things. It got him to maybe reverse his thinking a bit. While he still has not called and may never it has also calmed me down a lot and I am prepared now for whatever happens. I still cry myself to sleep all the time. And I know what you are going through because I am almost your age. Breakups are tougher I think the older you get. Good luck and let me know what happens. feel free to PM me if you want my e-mail and you can write me whenever you feel bad. I think sharing helps. Link to post Share on other sites
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