stace Posted July 10, 2003 Share Posted July 10, 2003 Hi. I really need some advice on my situation. 3 and a half months ago I split up from my boyfriend. We were together for 9 months but knew eachother for 2 and a half years. Our relationship was so good, we were soulmates. He would always tell me how much I meant to him and how much he loved me. We amde loads of plans for the future. However, we started to argue a lot because we were both stressed with work. After one argument we stupidly said that we should just be friends. None of us meant this. But that day I went out, got drunk and kissed another lad. I immediatley realised that it wasn't right and how much I loved my boyfriend. But he found out thats I kissed someone else and was so hurt. He cried for days and I felt so horrible for hurting him so much. We met up quite a few times, but for even 2 months after we split up, he would still get sad and say how he was still hurting becasue of what I'd done. Even though he wouldn't get back with me because he said what I did lowered his opinion of me. He is really stubborn and I thought that once he had time to think, that he'd realise we were meant to be together. He is now seeing someone else though. He had started seeing her when we were meeting up, and he told me he wasn't ready to start something new, even though he'd already met her. They have been together for 2 months now. We were still friends up until a month ago. We arranged to go for a drink, but I couldn't go one night because I was going out for a meal with some friends. He assumed it was a date, and got weird with me. He didn't phone to arrange the drink for the next night as we had planned, and ignored me for a week I text him to see what was happening and he said that it would be best if we had no contact. I dont understand what changed in that week?! And surely he didn't give himself enough time before diving straight into another relationship, especially as he said ours was so special. I dont know what to do now and would really appreciate some advice!!! Please help Link to post Share on other sites
MercyRose Posted July 11, 2003 Share Posted July 11, 2003 The only way to get him back-that is is if he still wants you back is to cut of contact and wish him well in his new relationship. Tell him something like: "Obviously you have moved on and your new love makes you happy. I want you to be happy but I have to move on too and the best and easiest way is for us not to have contact so we can get on with our lives." Add whatever else you think you want to say then really cut contact. If he loves you he will come back. If he is merely punishing you he will either snap out of it and want you back when he thinks he is losing you or he will carry on his new relationship in stubborn anger feeling he is paying you back by not being with you-ever. What he does is not in your power. What's in your power is: - to choose not to stay in a situation that causes pain. - take action to change the situation. - move on with your life. If he comes back, he comes back, if not accept it and move on. But don't stay in this situation, it will only keep you in a state of agonizing emotional pain. Link to post Share on other sites
danandlea Posted July 11, 2003 Share Posted July 11, 2003 i dont really blame him, not that it is your fault but you should of not kissed that boy, i swear he finds it hard without you as im in the same position, the last thing he needs is to find out you went off with another boy so quickly. hang in there Link to post Share on other sites
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