What did i ever do

[jtg2179]

Well let me start by saying that i have been a lost person for about 3mths now. my Ex-girlfreind and i broke up after a three and a half year relationship. she keeps telling me that i have done nothing wrong and that i should go on about my life with out her, that i need to be happy with myself before i can be happy with others.

 

Well truthfully i was happiest with her. i have never been very good at relationships and when we met it was by accident. and i fell in love with her instantly. we started seeing each other more and more and we were having a good time in the process. well about 2mths into our relationship her ex-boyfreind started calling her he was in the military and had just gotten back from being over seas. well i thought that i was doing the right thing by not interfearing with there freindship. i mean i still talk to some of my Ex's about problems that i am having with whoever i may be dating.

 

well they talked a couple of more times and she told me all about him and then he quit calling well all was good we were still going good and doing alot of things together during that summer. well at the end of the summer she goes back to college which was only a couple of hours away and i would go and visit her and she would come home to see me.

 

one weekend when i was up there seeing her we had what i called a sex filled weekend now this was not the first time we have had sex but that was the most that we had ever had in one weekend. a month went by and we are talking on the phone one night and she told me that she was pregnant well we went and had an abortion. this really devistated me but i did not let her know that at all untill we broke up a few months ago i just figured that god had a plan for me and that this was the girl i was to marrya nd that we would get threw it all and we did and things got alot closer than we were before the baby. we were still going strong things were great.

 

the school year came to a close and things were still going wonderfull went threw the whole summer with mo problems and we became like one we did everything together and sorta started living together, when she went back to school after that summer we started having some problems and we would work them out but she was living with a girl that was always having boyfreind problems and they started giving us problems but we would work threw the problems. untill the end of the year when i was up visiting her and did something that i should not of done.

 

she was a tutor and one sunday while i was there she had to tutor some one for an hour. so she went to do that and i just stayed in her room well i got a little stir crazy and started plundring in her room well i found some letters that the old Ex boyfreind was writing to her there was really nothing in them except he would ask how i was and was she sure about me could she trust me and stuff like that. well that roze my curosity some more of course so i started looking some more and found her diary so i knew i should not have but i started reading it and read that just three weeks prior he had come to visit her and she had, had sex with him well i got very angry but not at her more at myself if i had never read that i would have had no idea.

 

well when she returned i did not tell her that i had read her diary but i did ask her if there had been anyone else while she was at school. she denied it at first but came around and told me that she had kissed her Ex boyfreind. well that made me very mad but i droped it for that time. after the school year ended i was out of town doing some work and she told me that one of her freinds was getting married and she was going to go to the wedding so i just assumed that i was going as well. well she did not want me to go with her which was very odd and made me be very curious about what was going on.

 

well i have rambled enough so i will make this shorter. she ended up having sex with her Ex-boyfreind agian at the wedding and we broke up for awhile and got back together for her last year in college and we broke up at the end of her last year. she graduated last weekend. now that she is home i am having a very hard time with our break up and i do not know what to do i have considered suicide just because i would not have to feel this pain anymore but i have ruled that out now.

 

i talked to her the other day and she says that she is going to move away which just happens to be the same area that her Ex boyfreind lives in i know that she is still hung up on him and i can see that there is really no way that we will ever get back together bu8t i do not know what to do to get over her i just do not want to go on livin without her. what do you think?

[NEONINK]

First of all, suicide is a long-term solution for a short-term problem.

 

In other words, there will be much life after your heartbreak! Lots of great things in store for you. Actually, life is what you make it.

 

I can't say about the cheating, she was in college, so you knew there was a chance. However, that doesn't excuse that behavior. It was wrong.

 

I'm sorry about the abortion. I won't preach though. Having a baby is not reason enough to marry, so I hope you aren't thinking if you would have had the baby, you would still be together. That's usually not the case.

 

She's moving into a new stage of life. She will actually have to work now! Imagine that. Perhaps she outgrew you, perhaps she'll regret this decision, perhaps a lot of things. Perhaps she'll try and return to you. That seems to be her way of dealing with things. Look, if she wants GI Joe... let her have him. And you can find what makes you happy. You haven't been happy in a while with this girl. Find someone that wants the same things that you want!!!!

 

It is going to hurt for awhile. That's life. And sometimes, that's love. You will get over this. I promise.

[Gray]

Yup, I agree 100% that you'll get over it. If you look deep inside yourself, you'll know it too, but you're trying to get to that point now, and you can't, because the only thing that'll make it feel better is time, and no one can rush that. It sucks, and it's gonna suck, but it'll get better. GF of 2 years dumped me and i descended into hell for about 3 months myself. It'll get easier, and I gaurantee at some point you'll laugh to yourself "omg i can't believe i posted that to an internet forum."

 

But seriously man, you don't wanna be with someone that would cheat on you. If you have a good relationship there would never be a need to cheat. In the long run it'll work out for you, because who knows how much more it would've hurt if she had cheated on you while you were married, or with a kid, or whatever else.

 

Neon isn't gonna preach but i will, use a condom. They suck, but eh, use it for a few years get married and its like virgin sex all over again.

 

Good luck to ya buddy. It'll get easier.

[jtg2179]

thanks you all are right it is getting a little easier with time but i still thank about her alot. some of my freinds are trying to get me to go out with some other people and i am concedering it but i am having hard time commiting to it. but just to let you know i am working threw it

[Gray]

Awesome, good to hear, you definately sound in better mood. Eh, don't let your friends push ya into something too soon, but go out hang out check out the ladies and make a move when you're ready.