Sara Sissi Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 Hi everyone I am writing here because I need someone to listen to me, as I can't cope anymore on my own with this sadness that's killing me. I'm sorry if my post is too long, I'll try to summarise as much as I can! I met my boyfriend last july and it was love at first sight. We both fell madly in love with each other and we developed a very intense, passionate and close relationship. ...within months we felt like we were going to be together forever. I always believed this to be true...but over time he became so jelous and he accused me of so many things I had never done. This sense of guilt (for things I hadn't done) started overwhelming me and I became aggressive with him, when I calmed down I got distant so he accused me even more...and it became a cycle. Then one day in early february, I got accepted into law school for next year and we spoke about living together. My parents they strongly opposed to this,but when I told him, he became terribly emotional and irrational, and told me that there was no point in us being together as my parents hated him anyway. I tried explaining they were simply trying to advise me for the best... anyway, in the end, I ended up telling him I agreed that it was not right to move in together given we argued so much. I still always loved him to bits, but over time I felt more and more unwell, and so was he. We simply argued all the time over nothing. We entered into a cycle of break ups. during the 'breaks' we are always in contact and we send each other messages of love and promises of getting back together. but then we end up hurting each other and we start the cycle again. today he told him to 'leave him alone'... but later he wrote to me apologising and asking how i feel. despite all the arguments and being with him was the best thing I've ever experienced. I genuinely think he is the right one for me....because i can't imagine feeling any more love for another man. Over this period of time (three months), I have been unable to cope with normal daily tasks, including eating, sleeping, getting up in the mornings, arriving to places on time. I have now been seeing my GP a few times for over a month, and have started counselling. Last friday, I have told my GP that I have not improved and that I cry every time that I'm alone and wish to stop living. She has prescribed me anti depressants which I have now started to take but haven't felt any effect yet. Now, more than ever, I need my boyfriend by my side. Over the past weeks, he spent hours talking to me to make me feel better about myself but then he always concluded that I had not wanted him to be there for me anymore so he couldn't do it anymore because he felt used by me. I want him back so desperately, but he has asked me to leave him alone. I know he loves me and I want him to believe in me and trust me. It hurts so much not be believed by him... he thinks I want different things to him, but we want the same things only he does not understand my reactions when I'm hurt... Link to post Share on other sites
thisisme Posted March 31, 2009 Share Posted March 31, 2009 I wish I could say something to help you but I am going through a similar situation. I just posted a thread about it. It's agonizing when you know the person is the right one but for whatever reason you can't work it out. How does that make sense? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sara Sissi Posted April 9, 2009 Author Share Posted April 9, 2009 yes that is exactly it. i've started wondering how much other people's role has influenced our relationship...in the sense that many people believe i'm too young to have found 'the right one' therefore it's difficult to start a life with him like he would want to ... i know it doesn't matter how others think, but i can't ignore my family! i am 21 so i'm not a baby, but my parents believe i'm too young commit to someone. i have decided to convince them step by step of why i am so in love with him and why i think he is the right one for me. i believe the problems with my boyfriend are very much an issue of self-confidence. hopefully, if he feels accepted by my family, he will understand how much he means to me. fingers crossed!! Link to post Share on other sites
Ronni_W Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 It's agonizing when you know the person is the right one but for whatever reason you can't work it out. How does that make sense? The only way I've been able to make even the slightest sense of that type of situation is to keep reminding myself that he OBVIOUSLY isn't as "right" for me as I used to think -- cos reality and what I used to think are totally opposite. And reality ain't "wrong" or "mistaken" -- it just is what it is. It still sucks, though. And it still is what it is. Know what I mean? Hugs. Link to post Share on other sites
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