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I’d like to get more evidence of exactly what’s going on. I kinda figure if something is going on that it’s eventually going to come out or if she does this again then I’m going to confront her and just tell her I knew she lied last time also.

I didn’t do it all we alternated travel. it’s just I genuinely don’t click with anyone in that way. He said we really clicked too. Even last time we met up. I’m just confused why finally I got a chance at love and this happened

Yep. My therapist used to tell me in jest when I was down on myself and blaming the world "self-pity is a wonderfully attractive quality". He also corrected some of my bad habits like responding negatively to compliments. Two pointers I feel would fit OP also but hey, he feels therapy is useless.

Kindley, I think this is wishful thinking on your part. Telling you that you he does not feel a romantic connection is all you need to hear. Believe people when they tell you how they feel. You yourself said he always kept dates short and was in a rush to get you out of his house when you stayed over. Why didn't you ask him to travel 1.5 hours to visit you instead of you doing all the heavy lifting?

For the same reason the men aren't messaging you back is the same reason you're picky yourself. I don't know what those reasons are, but we all have them and we're the only ones capable of figuring them out. Once you do you'll figure out what you're looking for in a man and you'll get better dates.

Oh for chrissakes. That's like saying that a man is being sexist for expecting his wife to carry the child when they both want biological kids instead of getting a uterus transplant and doing it himself, isn't it? 🙄 The fact is that no gender is "inherently better" at cooking or cleaning, but bodies that were born male are generally physically stronger, and bodies that were born male are generally unable to carry a pregnancy. Not in all cases, but in the majority. Acknowledging those physical differences has nothing whatsoever to do with gender roles or feminism. Also, just so you know, y

A negative therapy. He's getting a lot of attention (I'm guilty of contributing) for whining. Part of successful therapy and just general growth and learning in life is to experience that doing what one is doing is NOT WORKING and if they want a different outcome, change within themselves is required. Whining is not included in that process unless it's a very preliminary step. Not a full time way of life.

Nobody here actually knows you, we have not interacted with you. If you are so desperately lonely that you put all of your hopes on a guy that you dated a little while and who was always distant, I think you need to take a look at what you are bringing to your friendships. I get the impression that you are needy and passive when it comes to being a friend. I can tell you for sure that EVERYONE has people come and go in their lives. It doesn't mean that we are "only good to be a boredom buster."

This should be the title of this thread. This is the real issue here. Do you mean if he had money you would date a man 1 month out of a relationship? This man is a no-go. Tell him it was nice meeting him but you're not in the same place. I am surprised you are even considering this.

Just says they are immature and that they were struggling under the additional weight of working together. There is nothing particularly good about their friending and unfriending--but this behavior is not a sign of serious mental health problems. Conflict can be good because people have the chance to get their complaints and requests out in the open. As long as there is no violence, let her be.

He used to always tell me how similar we are and how well we get along. He used to tell me I was hot and he would hold my hand kiss my forehead. but after dates he would be all cold and distant. imnnot sure if it’s because he was deciding if he will stay in this country long term or go back to his home country the other side of the world

Buying a trinket is not taking care of a woman. Being protective and being there for you in an emergency is taking care of you. You may not have voiced that you wanted him to buy you a trinket, but the fact is you did and expected it, that's why you threw out hints.

We can't advise you on this argument until you tell us what it was about and what was said.

Count yourself lucky. You've dodged a bullet... It's difficult to know where you stand when you are getting mixed signals. Your gut instinct turned out to be true.

Why are you getting worked up over someone you don't know?

4.5 hours isn't that long of a drive. I have a friend who lives in L.A. and works in Vegas and comes home every weekend. That's a 4.5 hour drive. If you trust your boyfriend there should be nothing to worry about.

Dude you’re pissing me the f*** off I’m not gonna lie to you.

Good. She was nice enough to give you an answer. Now leave the young lady alone from now on.

This is not true. It's just that the men who are interested in you, you don't want. You yourself said you're very picky. That could also be the case with this guy, he's picky. He likes you as a person/friend, but not romantically. It's up to you to protect your heart and not hang around men who will hurt you. If he's told you that you aren't his type, you need to block him.

Long distance relationships are very tough for some people, especially for anxious attachers who worry a lot and need tangible contact. That said, 4 hours driving distance isn’t that much. I know couples who survived 2 or more years LDR while studying in different countries 20 airplane hours apart. If you guys love and trust each other, you’ll be able to do it. Try to see each other as much as you can. Today’s technology makes everything so much easier. I had a relationship that turned long-distance (4-hour flight apart) during its fourth year. We were both poor students who could hardly

I got a response. It’s her ex.

Your definition of chemistry doesn't seem to be inline with what most people consider chemistry to be. Most people consider chemistry to be physical interaction and the desire to become intimate with one another. In which there was little of from what you described. What you described is what many people would consider friendship. A lot of people are going to bed with each other by the third date. Not just doing a little hand holding.

Sex requires that they both want each other in a sexual way, which they do, and the blocking and unblocking is led by their emotions. You seem to know quite a bit about their interaction, so it sounds like she's shared a lot. If she isn't complaining about him and is having sex with him, they probably really like each other. How old are they?

Maybe she didn’t see it the same way, but to me the chemistry was there. Conversation flowed effortlessly and we made each other smile and laugh the whole time. Our second date lasted for over 8 hours. I don’t know why she wouldn’t think there was chemistry, but oh well. What the hell do you mean I’m probably not ready for it yet?

The kiss thing. You wanted a kiss but also wanted to be respectful. IMO you could have been assertive but not overbearing by asking for the kiss. Overbearing would have been planting a kiss on someone out of the blue without them expecting it. Assertive is saying that you have a preference for a particular movie or restaurant for the date. Overbearing is not hearing the other person out about why they don't want to see that movie or eat in that restaurant.