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How to Make Tinder Work For You


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Old 17th October 2017, 4:35 PM   #1
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How to Make Tinder Work For You

I've seen so many guys complaining about Tinder. It seems the average guy takes a huge self esteem hit after using this. The gender ratio on the app is 2 men for ever 1 woman. A huge chunk of those men are already in a relationship or dating 4 to 5 women at a time. Another big chunk of those men are unattractive males that women skip over quickly.

For any guys struggling on Tinder one of the most important pieces of advice to give you is to pay for professional photos. If you don't do this you will never maximize your results. I noticed that even handsome guys with pictures that project boring do poorly on Tinder. Uglier guys with professional fun pictures do better.

Once you get a match texting can be a challenge. You want to project fun and interesting. Beware that if you start by saying something regarding her profile... probably the last 5 guys also noticed that and also started conversations based on this. My suggestion is to choose a topic that makes you look good and can lead to fun conversations. Laughing and joking should be the goal. You have the whole Internet at your disposal to help, so no excuses.

Last thing. The Tinder algorithm is a b*tch. I don't want to talk about it publicly, but if anyone needs help understanding how to maximize this... feel free to PM me.
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Old 1st November 2017, 3:06 AM   #2
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How can a woman make Tinder work for her? Would professional pics also be good for women as well? How should she respond to the guys who message if she's not good at flirting through the internet ? What should she put in her profile?

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Old 1st November 2017, 10:29 AM   #3
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How can a woman make Tinder work for her? Would professional pics also be good for women as well? How should she respond to the guys who message if she's not good at flirting through the internet ? What should she put in her profile?
Professional photos will be even more helpful for women.

You should get better at flirting through txt. You should have a least a couple days of flirting before you meet up, unless you just want quick sex. It is an opportunity to show off your personality and get the guy to emotionally invest in you. Men will make a pretty rapid determination as to whether you are LTR material or ONS material. They may change their minds later, but first impressions are important. Key point is to tailor your approach to what you want. If you want a ONS this should be pretty simple. Just message the guy "meet me at the starbucks on 5th and Pike... I want you to f*ck me in the bathroom." I had someone use that line on me, so I know it works.

Most guys after matching with you... will go back and read your profile to look for something to talk to you about. So the things you put in your profile should be things you want to discuss.

I guess the key questions are what are you looking for? and why do you struggle with flirting by txt?
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Old 1st November 2017, 7:37 PM   #4
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Most men complain because they get hung up on one person on tinder or can't get anyone to swipe right.

You have to wipe the slate clean and treat each new match as an opportunity. There can be dry spells...so what. It doesn't mean you give up. The next match that can be right for you could be 2 weeks away
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Old 1st November 2017, 10:24 PM   #5
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Most men complain because they get hung up on one person on tinder or can't get anyone to swipe right.
You have to wipe the slate clean and treat each new match as an opportunity. There can be dry spells...so what. It doesn't mean you give up. The next match that can be right for you could be 2 weeks away
Most guys complain because they get 1 match a month... and that one match ghosts them quickly.
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Old 2nd November 2017, 4:06 PM   #6
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Professional photos will be even more helpful for women.

You should get better at flirting through txt. You should have a least a couple days of flirting before you meet up, unless you just want quick sex. It is an opportunity to show off your personality and get the guy to emotionally invest in you. Men will make a pretty rapid determination as to whether you are LTR material or ONS material. They may change their minds later, but first impressions are important. Key point is to tailor your approach to what you want. If you want a ONS this should be pretty simple. Just message the guy "meet me at the starbucks on 5th and Pike... I want you to f*ck me in the bathroom." I had someone use that line on me, so I know it works.

Most guys after matching with you... will go back and read your profile to look for something to talk to you about. So the things you put in your profile should be things you want to discuss.

I guess the key questions are what are you looking for? and why do you struggle with flirting by txt?
Thank you COBRA!!!! I go back to Tinder in a little less than a month. I am super excited about turning over a new leaf.

I will get my friend to take professional shots. The thing is I think many ppl think you are a catfish when your pics are too professional if you are a woman. At least I have been told that by my dates.

I thought if I told a guy to meet me somewhere and sex me in the bathroom he will almost certainly think I am a messing with him. I wouldn't do that any way since that is gross.

The thing with Tinder is there are only so many characters you can use in your profile so you have to make it short and sweet. I don't know if I should talk about my interests directly or add humor/sarcasm. Seems like women like sarcasm more than men do.

Not sure what I'm looking for atm

Last edited by Cookiesandough; 2nd November 2017 at 4:33 PM..
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Old 2nd November 2017, 4:47 PM   #7
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Thank you COBRA!!!! I go back to Tinder in a little less than a month. I am super excited about turning over a new leaf.
I will get my friend to take professional shots. The thing is I think many ppl think you are a catfish when your pics are too professional if you are a woman. At least I have been told that by my dates.
I thought if I told a guy to meet me somewhere and sex me in the bathroom he will almost certainly think I am a messing with him. I wouldn't do that any way since that is gross.
The thing with Tinder is there are only so many characters you can use in your profile so you have to make it short and sweet. I don't know if I should talk about my interests directly or add humor/sarcasm. Seems like women like sarcasm more than men do.
I seek a LTR. I think. I don't know
No, I've tested this with some female friends. Even if the guys think you might be a Bot, they will still match with you in hopes that you are a model or something. If you message them first, just try not so say something generic.

Maybe something like... "I normally only swipe right for shirtless bathroom selfies, but for you I'm making an exception!"

This is the primary difference here. As a guy... I'm not worried about getting abducted and killed even though it's more likely to happen to me than you. We just don't think about negative outcomes as often which makes us risk takers. So, if some lady asks me to meet her in the bathroom for sex... I'm likely going to get robbed and then stabbed by her pimp. Even still... I'm going to show up just to see, because you might think it's gross... but it can also be really hot.

Don't worry about showing off your personality. These guys don't care yet. That's why you chat with them and flirt.

Something like...

I'm a Student majoring in Psychology. I play Tomb Raider, and dress like Sailor Moon sometimes. 420 friendly. I enjoy sailing, watching football, hunting deer. My favorite foods are sushi, beer, and martinis.

See, what you are doing here is giving the guy a topic to approach you with, and helping him to get an idea of what kind of date you might enjoy.

"Hey Cookies, lets go Sailing while dressed as Anime characters, later we can smoke pot, eat sushi and play Tomb Raider while drinking martinis!"

Does that make sense?
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Old 2nd November 2017, 9:17 PM   #8
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I have absolutely no problem attracting women. My problem is my poor judgment when it comes to character, and I fear that something like Tinder is a cesspool of dysfunctional people. Maybe that's a bit irrational, but I am seriously gun shy after my last relationship. Am I wrong thinking that not a lot of quality women would be on Tinder? I always thought it was more for f**k buddies.
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Old 3rd November 2017, 12:15 PM   #9
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Well, I do agree that in Tinder, Pictures Are King and that your photos should be good quality. I don't agree with the advice of paying for professional photos though, especially for men. It just looks too try-hard, and I think women would be wondering why you just couldn't get friends to have your picture taken with instead.

I mean, think about it. Are the guys who are cleaning up on Tinder getting professional pictures of them taken? I seriously doubt it. Are they just so naturally good-looking anyway? See I'm not sure about that either.

You want a photo that clearly shows your face and "what you look like" , which includes a full-body shot. You don't need a professional to do that for you though. What women really want to see, after they ascertain what you look like, is that you are a cool guy with a life. One of those group shots of you out having fun with your friends at a bar, would be terrific. Another great photo would be of you doing something you are passionate about--playing the guitar, competing in a CrossFit competition, ect.
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Old 3rd November 2017, 2:35 PM   #10
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I mean, think about it. Are the guys who are cleaning up on Tinder getting professional pictures of them taken? I seriously doubt it. Are they just so naturally good-looking anyway? See I'm not sure about that either.
Yeah, I've got to agree. I do perfectly fine on Tinder with normal pictures and one sentence description. I didn't see the need to "hack the algorithm" or anything, it works fine as it is. I'm just honest and I treat the experience as frivolously as it deserves to be treated. So, basically the opposite approach to the OP and I wouldn't change anything. When I see the professional pictures I assume the girl (and I can imagine, guy) is a struggling actor using their headshots, or has been so unsuccessful thus far due to some yet to be seen character flaw that they had to double down on the pictures. No thanks.

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Instead, one of those group shots of you out having fun with your friends at a bar, would be terrific.
One or two is fine, but not the first picture. When all a girl's pictures are group shots and I can't determine which one she is, I swipe left.
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Old 3rd November 2017, 2:41 PM   #11
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I think those professional pictures are actually a turn off, especially if it's an average looking girl... makes it kind of seem like she probably looks "worse" in her normal pictures and in RL. (Same goes for guys I guess)
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Old 3rd November 2017, 3:48 PM   #12
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Well, I do agree that in Tinder, Pictures Are King and that your photos should be good quality. I don't agree with the advice of paying for professional photos though, especially for men. It just looks too try-hard, and I think women would be wondering why you just couldn't get friends to have your picture taken with instead.
I mean, think about it. Are the guys who are cleaning up on Tinder getting professional pictures of them taken? I seriously doubt it. Are they just so naturally good-looking anyway? See I'm not sure about that either.
How much do you know about photography? Lighting, composition, framing these are super important and your idiot frat buddy isn't going to know how to make a picture look great.

Even a guy with male model looks will not do as well on Tinder if he doesn't have interesting photos. Pros know how to pose you, how to use background and lighting to make your pictures pop. If you downsize the pic the vast majority of women cannot tell that it's a professional photo.

https://prezi.com/bfipwphzecew/good-vs-bad-photography/

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Yeah, I've got to agree. I do perfectly fine on Tinder with normal pictures and one sentence description. I didn't see the need to "hack the algorithm" or anything, it works fine as it is. I'm just honest and I treat the experience as frivolously as it deserves to be treated. So, basically the opposite approach to the OP and I wouldn't change anything. When I see the professional pictures I assume the girl (and I can imagine, guy) is a struggling actor using their headshots, or has been so unsuccessful thus far due to some yet to be seen character flaw that they had to double down on the pictures. No thanks.
One or two is fine, but not the first picture. When all a girl's pictures are group shots and I can't determine which one she is, I swipe left.
What kind of professional photographer would give you some crappy modeling shots? You would have to be an idiot to use something like that.

I've got photos of me in downtown, at a charity event, sailing, and jogging in the park. 3 of those photos were taken in the same shoot within about 1 hour of each other.

If you think you are doing fine, then this thread isn't for you. If you read the experiment below you will see many guys are not doing great.

https://medium.com/@worstonlinedater...d---------0-44

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I think those professional pictures are actually a turn off, especially if it's an average looking girl... makes it kind of seem like she probably looks "worse" in her normal pictures and in RL. (Same goes for guys I guess)
All I can say is that I have tested this theory and you are completely wrong. The vast majority of women cannot tell if a photo is professional or not. It either looks good or it doesn't.

The majority of men see a woman in a pro photo and assume she is a model of some kind.
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Old 3rd November 2017, 4:01 PM   #13
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I have absolutely no problem attracting women. My problem is my poor judgment when it comes to character, and I fear that something like Tinder is a cesspool of dysfunctional people. Maybe that's a bit irrational, but I am seriously gun shy after my last relationship. Am I wrong thinking that not a lot of quality women would be on Tinder? I always thought it was more for f**k buddies.
Every major city in America is a cesspool of dysfunctional people. There are not a lot of quality women anywhere. I mean if the women of America had a mascot it would be Kim Kardashian... whos talent is sleeping with celebrities and having a big @ss.

I think most Tinerellas are looking for short to mid term sexual relationships. There are a handful who are looking for true love.

Bumble is a bit better for the quality of woman to my opinion.

But seriously... if you are looking for good women don't do it in the US. I do a lot of international travel for work. There are some great places to find a wife when you are ready. It ranges from places everybody knows like Ho Chi Minh City, to shocking places like Tehran. I think probably 30% or more of the female population in Iran isn't religious at all.
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Old 3rd November 2017, 4:55 PM   #14
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https://medium.com/@worstonlinedater...d---------0-44



All I can say is that I have tested this theory and you are completely wrong. The vast majority of women cannot tell if a photo is professional or not. It either looks good or it doesn't.

The majority of men see a woman in a pro photo and assume she is a model of some kind.
I was talking about me personally, not the view of men in general, so you might be right about that. I probably should've phrased it a bit better.

I also meant the kind of pictures that were obviously shot in a studio, the ones with a clear background, I see those all the time on Tinder. I know girls often give shoots like that as a gift to their girlfriends, so I wouldn't assume she's a model. (Unless the girl is very attractive) If you have professional "natural looking" pictures, then yeah I guess that would work
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Old 3rd November 2017, 5:45 PM   #15
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While I'm not an expert on Tinder, I remember a study from a sight that allowed its users to rate the attractiveness of a person in a photo. This was then correlated to the photo's EXIF data (a photo's meta information).

It showed that photos shot with DSLRs without a flash generally ranked the highest. These tend to be portraits shot by somebody who probably has at least a basic grasp of photography, and the shots were likely taken outside of a studio.

This should not be surprising to anybody who has ever shot casual portraits with a city or nature as a backdrop.
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