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I am not attracted to most men. What is wrong with me?


In Search Of... Having a hard time forming friendships or finding companions, lovers, or associates? Is someone pursuing an unwelcome relationship with you? Talk about your experiences here.

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Old 31st December 2017, 10:55 PM   #91
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There is nothing wrong with not being attracted to a lot of different men. It just means you're selective and like what you like.

No shame in that
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Old 1st January 2018, 2:51 AM   #92
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Originally Posted by HiCrunchy View Post
Well alot of advice from women on the thread seem to be like they dont care for looks so Id think that Im in the minority
It's a lie. They do care for looks. They have simply hit a point where they are willing to date and potentially marry a man that they don't find attractive. They don't care to have strong sexual chemistry or whatnot. Some of them are also likely lower down the attractive scale so their standards are lower.

I spent a good amount of time as an athlete. I've seen those women who say looks don't matter bend over backwards to get with me while ignoring uglier guys with better personalities. I've seen this at work first hand.

So... in giving you advice I'm torn. If your standards are insane and they might be, then you should change what you are attracted to. If you routinely run across guys who fit what you like, then I believe you are just honest.
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Old 1st January 2018, 9:27 AM   #93
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Originally Posted by HiCrunchy View Post
Well alot of advice from women on the thread seem to be like they dont care for looks so Id think that Im in the minority
I don't think you're in the minority in the sense that I'm certain that most women care about looks. In my experience I would only believe a handful of them if they said that they don't.

However, if you are truly that selective then your efforts to find that person will have to be proportionally higher to have a realistic chance of finding a match. It's as much a prerogative as it is a challenge.
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Old 1st January 2018, 11:33 AM   #94
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Nothing is wrong with you. I think you need to love yourself more. Take care of yourself. When you can love yourself fully (which takes time) then youll be ready to love a man and it will come to you.
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Old 2nd January 2018, 9:05 PM   #95
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Congratulations, you are a demi-sexual!
That's ok, I am one too! I don't get sexually aroused by anyone but my partner. I am totally ok with that.

It's a blessing. You just have to wait until you fall in love.
And for that, you have all the time in the world.

x
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Old 2nd January 2018, 10:52 PM   #96
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Originally Posted by Cookiesandough View Post
Have you tried dating guys outside of your taste? You might feel it is a waste of time, and at first it may be, but you might eventually be surprised by someone outside of your type who charms you.
Yes I did that once. It lasted 3 weeks because I couldn't bring myself to kiss him. I left him and never got feelings for him in a romantic (or even a friendship sense). I wasn't attracted to him in anyway shape or form and my friends wondered why I was dating him at all. (He wasn't great personality wise either).

I am open to having someone else charm me I suppose but I just end up "friend-zoning" them. I am very guilty of that I suppose. Not on purpose but they end up being really good friends but nothing develops relationship wise.

I should go on more dates I guess.

Last edited by HiCrunchy; 2nd January 2018 at 10:56 PM..
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Old 2nd January 2018, 11:38 PM   #97
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Nothing is wrong with you. I think you need to love yourself more. Take care of yourself. When you can love yourself fully (which takes time) then you’ll be ready to love a man and it will come to you.
Yes. It is strange how much I don't love myself.

I remember the last convo with my ex. He told me "be good to yourself HiCrunchy".

I have never forgotten that. He always told me I should love myself more. As have others in my life.

I think that is my biggest goal this year. Thinking of this makes me miss him all over again.

If I loved myself even a fraction as much as I loved him
As much as I loved my sister, or mother, or friends, then maybe life would be more bearable.
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Old 6th January 2018, 6:34 AM   #98
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Originally Posted by HiCrunchy View Post
Yes I did that once. It lasted 3 weeks because I couldn't bring myself to kiss him. I left him and never got feelings for him in a romantic (or even a friendship sense). I wasn't attracted to him in anyway shape or form and my friends wondered why I was dating him at all. (He wasn't great personality wise either).

I am open to having someone else charm me I suppose but I just end up "friend-zoning" them. I am very guilty of that I suppose. Not on purpose but they end up being really good friends but nothing develops relationship wise.

I should go on more dates I guess.
Yea I feel you. I hope you can learn to love yourself hicrunchy. You seem like an awesome person!

Last edited by Cookiesandough; 6th January 2018 at 6:38 AM..
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