Ideas on where to meet decent people for LTR potential

[Blackened Heart]

So as of late, I have been venturing back into the dating world, and it's been.... well to say the least quite a bit of a mess and it could just be a string of bad luck to be honest.

 

One girl I met from teaching a self defense class and we clicked rather quickly. Went on several dates but there were a lot of mixed signals from her part. I later came to found out there was another guy she was in a "relationship" with, who is almost 20 years old than her, separated from his wife (still married), and with four kids.... yea I ran away from that one as soon as I found out.

 

Another girl I met in a outdoors activity class, talked for a while and dated the next day. Entire day seemed great, but then flaked off when we planned the second date.

 

Now the latest girl been on two dates, but keeps bringing up her ex, so it's obvious she is stuck on him, so going to be ending that....

 

And I won't even get into those I've met through OLD, lots of ghosting and non-commitments.

 

The issue I'm having, is while these women may want to have fun and do temporary type things, it isn't what I'm looking for anymore. I want an actual partner to settle in with and develop a real, lasting relationship (shocker, I know). And while yes it would be great to open up with that right away, I've come to experience that type of discussion right away is a bit too.... heavy? First few times of meeting are suppose to be fun and just getting to know each other.... I just keep seem to keep meeting those that are either unavailable or not looking for that.

 

So LS community, I'm looking for some guidance on where to potentially meet women that would be looking for a serious thing. As far as OLD goes I've tried eHarmony, but that is appearing to be such a waste. So many of the profile that show up as matches appear to be inactive ones, those without subscriptions, and the few that even seem active are very unpredictable in responding.

[Eternal Sunshine]

How old are you?

[Blackened Heart]

Very early 30s, don't want to give exact age

[Chilli]

No expert now as l was married 20 yrs and it's a way way different scene out there now.

lotta very skittish and media screwed people out there too these days from what l've seen.

 

But l think you've done ok really. You've met people doing things you like doing, just not the right one yet is all.

But that's probably only a matter of the right time, right girl.

[d0nnivain]

You can theoretically meet people anywhere. I'm assuming you want more than the clichés of bars, OLD & singles events. Try these:

 

 

1. Join a co-ed sports team

 

 

2. Volunteer for a cause you believe in. Raise money to cure a disease. Visit the sick or elderly in a hospital or nursing home. Join a non profit board. Walk shelter dogs. Protest some political injustice of join a campaign.

 

 

3. Go to work / industry events, including networking & continuing education

 

 

4. Take or teach a class. Learn to cook, or do car repair; learn about the stock market. Heck, take basket weaving. Just expand your knowledge base.

 

 

5. Join a civic organization like the Moose, the Lions, the Rotary, the Elks, the volunteer FD etc.

 

 

6. Attend meet ups that do things you like. My friend met her husband through a ski club. I used to go play board games on Monday nights.

 

 

7. Get involved with unusual singles things. There are all sorts of niches. I used to go to one called Leashes & Lovers because I could bring my Dalmatian. When I met my husband I had been planning to join one called it's Just Golf. They paired you with somebody to play a round. I figured even if the company wasn't so great it was still a nice day on the course

 

 

8. Tell friends & family you are open to being fixed up. You never know who knows somebody who will be perfect for you.

 

 

 

 

One of my BFFs & I also read about this technique in a book but never had the chance to implement it. Get 4-6 guys together & throw a cocktail party in somebody's home. Have each guy invite a woman they love but don't want to date -- a sister, cousin, dear childhood friend etc. Everybody will have been vouched for & everybody knows that everybody in the room, expect the one who brought you, is fair game.

 

 

Happy hunting