Don't kiss on a first date, reject the 2nd?

[LookAtThisPOst]

Often times, I hear so-called "dating advice" where people have said that you should kiss on a first date at all times if you're a man to see if there is interest on their part.

 

That apparently, that's the end-all be-all advice to see if the woman's interest.

 

And if the man doesn't attempt to kiss on that date, there's no chance for a 2nd. Of course, he can call her to attempt to ask her out again, but it's not gonna happen.

 

Apparently, these dating gurus guarantee this outcome.

 

That there is this "window" of sorts to make a move.

 

Same thing goes for sex...but...on a third date, and if the woman doesn't put out by the 3rd date, it is suggested that a man move on find a woman that does.

 

OR...throw all that advice out the window and take it on a case-by-base basis, base your actions on how you feel in the moment AND how that person is receiving you. If she's an ice queen, why go in for a kiss the first date?

 

If she's completely melted by the 2nd date, then go for it, yes? Same goes for sex.

[d0nnivain]

As a woman I do prefer a kiss on or at the end of a 1st date. I've even been known to kiss before the 1st date. {gasp }

 

Although I am now middle aged, I doubt I have ever in my life had sex on a 3rd date. Until I came to LS I never even knew that was a thing. I probably had men try; I shot them down gently & we moved forward.

 

About the only hard & fast rules for dating out there are:

 

* have good hygiene

* be honest (but that doesn't mean disclose your deepest darkest secrets immediately; it just means don't tell bald faced lies)

* be yourself

* confidence is sexier than doormat / cling-on / whiney

[ScienceGal]

Throw it all out the window. My experiences have varied quite a bit! It does depend what you're ultimately looking for though.

 

With the guy I am currently dating, we didn't kiss until the third date. Sixth date is coming up, and we have not slept together yet. There is intimacy though (kissing, handholding, cuddling), and strong expressed interest (verbal). The communication we share is fantastic, and I like taking a little more time to actually get to know him. I don't see the need to rush the sexual connection, it'll happen. And really, the anticipation and build up is exciting

Edited May 26, 2016 by ScienceGal

[Satu]

There are no cast-iron rules.

 

It's entirely dependent on who those two people are.

[Satu]

Throw it all out the window. My experiences have varied quite a bit! It does depend what you're ultimately looking for though.

 

With the guy I am currently dating, we didn't kiss until the third date. Sixth date is coming up, and we have not slept together yet. There is intimacy though (kissing, handholding, cuddling), and strong expressed interest (verbal). The communication we share is fantastic, and I like taking a little more time to actually get to know him. I don't see the need to rush the sexual connection, it'll happen. And really, the anticipation and build up is exciting

 

“Wisely and slow; they stumble that run fast.”

 

― William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet

[Miss Clavel]

i just ask my date to kiss me as soon as they arrive. i like to get it out of the way and relax.

[Satu]

Will Powers -

 

 

"You may be a sharp dresser, you may be a fantastic dancer, you may be a lively conversationalist, but what happens at the end of the evening when the time comes to show how you feel? unless you

kiss with confidence all your fancy dressing, dancing and talking won't get you a second date.

 

I'd meet a boy I really liked

I'd start to win his heart

Come the time to kiss good-night

I always fell apart

 

I'd giggle like I had no brains

Or else I'd start to cough

I thought my perspiration stains

Would turn a fellow off

 

She was nervous

She was too shy

She was breathless

Lips were too dry

Hands were shaking

Didn't know why

 

Do you want to kiss this person? then be honest - what is keeping you from kissing with confidence? worries. some of them can be put to rest if you ask yourself a few simple questions before kissing.

 

Is your breath fresh?

Do your have spinach on your teeth?

Is your deodorant strong enough?

 

You may also find yourself worrying about what will happen once you are in the act of kissing. will your stomach growl? will your braces lock? will you be able to prolong the kiss and still breathe?

 

Will I spoil it with my overbite?

Will our noses bump in the moonlight?

When our lips meet, will they fit right?

 

These worries are best cleared from the mind by the romance chant method, a technique which will also place your lips naturally in kissing position. hableme el unico del mundo. digame: como te hace ese sonido. tan glorioso. que aun ahora con anticipation de el. me ha reducio a un bestia. grunedo. entusiomandose y palpitando. practice this chant in the morning as you rise, in the evening as you retire and just before a date.

 

 

 

Once you have mastered these techniques there is only one worry left - will it go too far? it never will if you remain alert to these danger signals - heavy breathing, wandering hands, strong heartbeats. a nice way to maintain self-control without offending the other person is to say -- "i'm not ready to handle what I think is coming", then you both go home and daydream. tomorrow you can start again fresh. just remember - you can not get pregnant from kissing.

 

I put an end to worrying, I learned the way from will

And showed me kissing with confidence was an acquired skill

When my boyfriends get too hot I can cool 'em down

Now I'm kissing with confidence everywhere in town

 

In the schoolyard

At the front door

In the laundromat

At the drug store

 

At the car wash

In the back yard

At the dairy queen

On a side street

 

In the basement

On the rooftop

At the drive in

At the stop and shop

 

On the back porch

At the candy store

On the boardwalk

By the seashore

 

In the balcony

At the malt shop

In the parking lot

On the blacktop

 

Once you can kiss with confidence, think of others these techniques will help. do you know someone who drools when he kisses or burps or bites? why not do them a favour and send them this record anonymously?"

[Papiyon]

Great insight on your part, It is expected that people will have different ideas about the same subject. Our interactions with people are based on our experiences, values, and religion and core beliefs. When we keep our differences in mind; we can decide what best works for us.