My lover Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 (edited) Is their an art to pulling?. Edited May 8, 2015 by My lover Link to post Share on other sites
WonderWoman911 Posted May 10, 2015 Share Posted May 10, 2015 Confidence, manners, a fun personality, and intelligence works when a guy is trying to flirt or talk to me. Lousy pick up lines and simply dumbness doesn't work AT ALL. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted May 10, 2015 Share Posted May 10, 2015 Having a reason to talk to me other than just they like what I look like. Having something to say, something in common. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted May 10, 2015 Share Posted May 10, 2015 genuity and openness.....straight forwardness..to me is gutsy ......no games no innuendo...simpleness, no ambiguity or half hearted attempts...to the point .... what doesnt work...sexual innuendo.....flirting that borders on sleaziness....aggressive behaviors......deb 1 Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted May 10, 2015 Share Posted May 10, 2015 I was never approached outside the local club so I can only say what worked there; one time when I was already semi-drunk that smile of his was enough. That other time I was sober and he was a little drunk; tried the "silly approach" first which failed because I was sober, but the guy was persistent and did the normal "Hey, would you and your friend join us for a few drinks?" approach a few minutes later and that worked quite well. If he hadn't nearly crushed my breast a few hours later I definitely would have loved to see him again. Link to post Share on other sites
zebracolors Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 In a way, this kind of applies to any people we meet in life. How awkward does it feel when you can tell the person in front of you is nervous or shy? So in that regard, someone at least confident enough to not to be nervous because they are secure enough and don't worry if people are judging them. Also, if it seems like we have a lot of similar interests, which can come up even in impromptu conversations, I find it engaging to pick their brains. Though it depends on the setting. A dance club that is dim and with loud music isn't that great for conversation. But in that setting, a turn off would absolutely be if a guy is ignoring my words and gestures that indicate I don't want to dance up close to him. And this happened to me recently so I thought I would add that. Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted May 17, 2015 Share Posted May 17, 2015 (edited) He has to be OK in the first place before even attempting to make contact, e.g. look clean and well-kept, smell nice. Then, if he's fairly confident, utterly polite, and fun, that's a really good start. Saying hello helps. Showing an interest helps, asking questions and so on. Offering to get a drink is nice, even if I don't accept. Just generally being attentive without being overwhelming or scary. That's the kind of presence that lets me know he's interested. Showing interest comes before asking for time together, like a date. Once you've been chatting for a while, that's the time to try to take it to a private meeting of some kind, a cafe, music event, or if you feel confident enough to ask them out for a meal (which kind of signals a date). Make contact politely, show interest, see whether the response is smiles and engagement in the conversation, aim to get comfortable with each other so that both are relaxed and smiling, then take it to trying to meet privately with some kind of fun invitation. As to what doesn't work, looking weird or being smelly, being sinister, lacking humour (looking grim and intense - dead scary!), hanging around when you've shown a total lack of interest. Edited May 17, 2015 by spiderowl 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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