PGM929 Posted August 21, 2017 Share Posted August 21, 2017 Been FWB since Jan 2016, but recently (June) we started seeing each other more often. Last year (around the holidays) we had "the talk" and both of us wanted to keep things casual/see other people. Since seeing each other more often, he wanted to (and did) meet some of my friends and my sons while at an event in my hometown. He has since told me how awesome my sons are and how amazing of a mom I am, etc. (Compliments used to just be of the "you're so beautiful/sexy variety, now he's added more). Yesterday, he asked me what I wanted for my birthday (next month) because he wants to get me a gift. I was caught off guard and honestly don't have gift ideas just readily available off the top of my head. So I told him to "surprise me". Last year, we wished each other Happy Birthday via text - these recent events have made me think he wants more. But I don't really want to have the "what are we" conversation because I don't want to ruin what we have. I guess my question is 2 sided. Do his actions show that he is looking for more from our relationship & would you actually give gift suggestions or let him decide? Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted August 21, 2017 Share Posted August 21, 2017 I always think that if you can get naked with a person, you should be able to talk with them too. The question of "what are we?" tends to lead a dance where neither of you knows what the other expects to hear and therefore isn't honest. Instead of being hazy, be assertive and lead with what you would like it to be. If you would like to see it progress to more, then be more direct with your talk. "I'm really enjoying this time with you. Do you think you could see it progressing to something more than FWB?" If a conversation such as this scares him off, then he was never going to meet your needs anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted August 22, 2017 Share Posted August 22, 2017 Why don't you see what he comes up with as a birthday gift. If it's something like jewelry unless you want to be in a relationship you clearly can't accept & must end the benefits because he caught feelings. If he buys you something fairly practical just chalk it up to him being a generous person. What do you want, though? Would you like to have a relationship with him? Don't let the fear of losing what you have hold you back. Take the risk If he's your FWB because for whatever reason you can't see yourself with him in public long term then end it. Link to post Share on other sites
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