cari.g Posted July 20, 2016 Share Posted July 20, 2016 So my friend, "Ellen" and I met a a couple of years ago. We had great chemistry and a great set up, but neither of us pursued anything initially. I don't know why. We became friends and have enjoyed an increasingly close friendship since. Over the past year or so, though, Ellen has hinted that she was interested in me still. I never reciprocated because I had some personal issues to work out and because I really only date outside of my friend circle. Ellen had a few of relationships since, but nothing concerning, and I pretty much forgot that she had ever been a potential lover. Not too long ago, though, Ellen met someone that she admitted to me she would like to spend the rest of her life with. They never lived together or go engaged, but Ellen was ready. I realized during this time that maybe I still liked Ellen more than I realized. I worried that I had missed my chance and that she was now going to be happy with somebody else. Then, a couple of months ago, they broke up. Almost a month ago, Ellen was hanging out with me as usual, and she asked me out. We began dating, slowly, because we were both worried about rebounding. She had always liked me, though, so we decided to give things a chance. Last week, she asked to pause things because she "wasn't as ready as she thought that she was" and "hadn't moved on yet" and "didn't want me to be a rebound". I'm fully aware that I should have seen this coming. We talked about it, but we should have waited, anyway. I really don't need to hear that any more than I've already told myself. I guess what I want to know is do we have a chance in the future? There were moments when we were together that felt different than before and that felt genuine. It wasn't all about sex, either. I'm just worried that, because we started before she was ready, that there is no chance of going back even if she does have some feelings for me. I worry that she liked me before but can't like me that way again because she learned to love somebody else more. I'm worried that I missed my chance for good. Hit me with the hard truth, guys. Is there hope? Link to post Share on other sites
Author cari.g Posted July 20, 2016 Author Share Posted July 20, 2016 Oh and should I text her check in? It's been just under a week. I want to check in to see how shr is doing as her friend again, but I don't know what is appropriate anymore. We haven't talked since that night, but she could easily be avoiding texting me for the same reasons. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted July 20, 2016 Share Posted July 20, 2016 >> "wasn't as ready as she thought that she was" and "hadn't moved on yet" and "didn't want me to be a rebound"<< I'm sorry, but this sounds like a classic breakup line. The kind of thing one says when they don't want to hurt the other party. She's given it a shot, wasn't feeling it and ended things. Link to post Share on other sites
Author cari.g Posted July 20, 2016 Author Share Posted July 20, 2016 You're probably right, but it was after she was stuck with her ex for a couple of hours at their friend's wedding. I guess I believed her because of that. Ellen has never had cause to lie to me before. Link to post Share on other sites
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