How should I read this?

[BetterNowThanNever]

I've been in contact with a man on a professional basis for over a year. He has always been courteous, efficient and considerate towards me. I only see him once every month, roughly. Since early March I've noticed when he greets me our eyes lock for a good few seconds, he smiles at me; the kind of smile when his whole face lights up. He often tries to get close to me and the last time I saw him a few weeks ago, as he handed me two keys, he placed them one after the other in my hand and pressed the palm of his hand against mine, twice. A while ago I was driving towards his workplace and I passed him on the road going in the opposite direction. As I arrived at his office a few seconds later I was surprised to see he'd come full circle and arrived back at the same time as me.

 

I'm a sociable kind of person - tactile and chatty with friends - but have become foolishly less so with him recently as there seems to be a certain tension between us. I don't know this man but he is reserved and quite shy. He's younger than I am (I've been separated from my husband for over a year now) and has always been respectful and thoughtful towards me. I cannot help but feel some kind of mutual attraction thing going on here but I value our professional relationship and I don't want to step out of line.

 

Any advice would be gratefully received. Thank you so much!

Edited April 19, 2016 by BetterNowThanNever
Wrong title

[preraph]

I think you have to wait and see if anything more develops than a palm press. Do you even know if he's single or has kids or anything more about him?

[smackie9]

Just ask him out for lunch or ask a few personal questions, or share a funny experience you had....make your encounters a little more personal, see what happens.

[BetterNowThanNever]

I think you have to wait and see if anything more develops than a palm press. Do you even know if he's single or has kids or anything more about him?

 

Thanks for replying! He is indeed single without children. I've reached a point after a very challenging year where I'm looking for a little frivolity only. And mutual respect too, of course.

 

Your sensible outlook is refreshing. I've had far too many friends telling me here in France that this guy is most certainly sending out discrete signals. It's always good to receive the opposite point of view to put things into perspective.

[BetterNowThanNever]

Just ask him out for lunch or ask a few personal questions, or share a funny experience you had....make your encounters a little more personal, see what happens.

 

Thank you! That's good advice. I always feel super respectful of another's work environment which can make things a little awkward.

[Papiyon]

Hi BetterNowThanNever

 

It does sound like there is something there. If not, he’s definitely flirting with you. I have to admit that I can’t help but focus on the fact that you mentioned that you’re separated from your husband. As a result, I’m wondering what bearing proceeding with these possible advances will could have on your marriage. I’m not sure if you and your husband have plans to reconcile but if you do, this possible connection with hinders growth between you and your husband. Maybe you should clear the “loose ends” between you and your husband before moving forward with this interest.

[BetterNowThanNever]

Hi BetterNowThanNever

 

It does sound like there is something there. If not, he’s definitely flirting with you. I have to admit that I can’t help but focus on the fact that you mentioned that you’re separated from your husband. As a result, I’m wondering what bearing proceeding with these possible advances will could have on your marriage. I’m not sure if you and your husband have plans to reconcile but if you do, this possible connection with hinders growth between you and your husband. Maybe you should clear the “loose ends” between you and your husband before moving forward with this interest.

 

Thank you so much for answering my post Papiyon, it's much appreciated.

 

My husband left our family home over a year ago, against my wish, and has unfortunately turned out to be a fully fledged Narcissist. The past twelve months have been truly awful; mostly because I see the way he behaves with our children and the awful strategies he uses to hurt me. Anyway, to answer your question, divorce proceedings are underway and I have absolutely no regrets in light of his behaviour to start a new chapter.