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After the nighmare is gone


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Hello!

 

I'm the same guy who popped into this forum only once asking about a critical situation in life. If you don't feel like reading pages of my personal story, here's a summary in short: it was awful, but now it's fine.

 

I saw her last in early July at the graduation ceremony. Before that, she hadn't given up her attempts to use me, as if nothing had happened. Seeing her was just as nervous for me, because even at our last collective meeting I felt my feelings were not over at all. Perhaps I was infatuated, that didn't make things easier.

 

A little earlier, but after sharing this story with you, I told it to a good friend of mine, and then in his presence told the girl in question to GTFO after some other requests for help. It somewhat eased my mind, even though normally I never do such things.

 

In August, I moved to the United States from my home European country (where this all basically happened). Before this I unfriended her on Facebook. So, have I really gotten over her during these three months spent abroad?

 

On the one hand, it never bothers me like it did a year ago. I don't care who she's with and what she thinks about me, and I feel neither depressed nor nervous. Actually I felt the same as during any holidays when I didn't see her at all.

 

On the other hand, I am almost totally sure that my feelings just became latent and I will have the same tremor inside when I see her next time. Hopefully, this will never happen. A month ago I stopped visiting any of her pages in social networks and expect to keep staying away from them. All I know is that a few weeks ago her boyfriend dumped her. Maybe she deserved it.

 

As long as I have new friends and hobbies in the States, this looks like the best possible chain of events for me. If I completely fall out of love with her, this will increase my chances to fall in love with someone else, which 95% will be unrequited and bring me new pointless sufferings. In a way, now I actually benefit from my past experiences.

 

This, however, cannot last forever, and I prefer the lesser evil. Can you guys recommend me any way to avoid falling in love with whomever?

 

The reason is the same. I want to be happy and, even when I'm not, not to be in deep depression or anxiety.

 

Thank you!

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