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Friends or more?


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Country_Girl

I have this fwb...I initially didn't want more, I'm still not sure I do...but there has to be some feelings, because when I think about it deep down, if he started dating anyone else I know I would feel hurt.

 

I can't have this conversation with him yet, he's 4 months out of a relationship and heart broken. I'm not going to discuss this, in 2 months sure, but right now he's hating life and has a bunch of problems with family- I'm not going to go there.

 

He confuses me at times...we don't always hook up. Sometimes we cuddle and watch movies for hours. We'll go weeks without hooking up, in the meantime we do dinner out, rent a movie, cuddle, I'll run my fingers through his hair.

 

Sometimes, without hooking up, he'll request a kiss goodbye. Not often, but happened more than once.

 

Sometimes he calls me "baby". He's not like this with everyone, in fact, other female friends that have nicknamed him, he has flat out told them they are in the friend zone and to stop calling him that.

 

He's 42 I'm 32.

 

Been friends 3 years.

 

We've been "more than friends for a little over 3 months". Known each other 3 years.

 

Should u continue as is, or do I need to go there?

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melodicintention

You're setting yourself up to for heartbreak. If he wants you to be his girlfriend he'd ask, but why because you are giving it away for free and during the time he's on the rebound no less he' likely isn't going to ask you.

 

Move on and find enough self respect not to sleep with men that don't want a relationship if a relationship is what you want. If you just want sex, then don't get romantically involved, which is nearly impossible to do as a woman.

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Is he having sex with other people as well? Are you?

 

What you're describing, as far as I can tell, is an actual romantic relationship with the exception that it has not been verbally discussed or "agreed to".

 

Really...the only question is, is it an EXCLUSIVE romantic relationship or is each still free to date and, or have sex with others.

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When I was still hurting and on a rebound, more than anything, I wanted to cuddle with someone, anyone. So, I chose this guy who was sort of my friend. He was willing to spend time with me. He was simply there, and not bad looking. I cuddled with him, held hands, but no sex. I was simply distracting my pain by doing these things with a person I did not have any feelings for. I never found out how he felt about me, and I left him as soon as I found someone who was more of my type. It simply served as a distraction. It was better (not better in a long run, of course) than sitting at home, crying.

 

Be careful!

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Country_Girl
Is he having sex with other people as well? Are you?

 

What you're describing, as far as I can tell, is an actual romantic relationship with the exception that it has not been verbally discussed or "agreed to".

 

Really...the only question is, is it an EXCLUSIVE romantic relationship or is each still free to date and, or have sex with others.

 

I'm not seeing or sleeping with anyone else, he isn't, as far as I can tell. Though it's never been discussed. Honestly, I don't think he has the time to see anyone else... The last 2 weeks we hung out 3 times during the week, and we're not talking for a couple hours, more like 7 hours each time we hang out.

 

He just invited me to go on a trip over Labor Day, we've never taken a trip before...I'm thinking I might get more clarity then.

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