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My friend won't take things seriously...


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SunshineOnMe

So long story short, a friend of mine dropped out of college. He planned to enroll in a community college in our town, but missed the deadlines to do so.

 

We're both 21. He's NEVER had a job. So for the past couple of days, I've been texting him multiple jobs that are looking for people. I get no reply.

 

I don't think he realizes that he can't just go for a whole semester and do nothing. The only income he makes is MOM AND DAD.

 

Maybe I shouldn't bother. We've been friends since the 4'th grade so I naturally care for him. But I'm slowly pulling away from the situation and the friendship.

 

Why the friendship?

 

- Last month we took a trip together out of state. On our way back I needed help with gas money. We ended up getting into it because he thought that since I had a job, that I should pay. WTF?

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That all came from failure of his parents to make him earn praise and rewards. A lot of parents are simply not doing their jobs anymore and they'll be supporting their grown kids for a very long time. You can't change what it took them 20 years to screw up, trust me. But what you can do is not enable him by letting him slide. Do not let him leech off you too. He needs a dose of reality in the worst way.

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You've done your part.

 

 

I'm sure you've heard this sometime in your life, but you can't help someone who can't help themselves.

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That all came from failure of his parents to make him earn praise and rewards. A lot of parents are simply not doing their jobs anymore and they'll be supporting their grown kids for a very long time. You can't change what it took them 20 years to screw up, trust me. But what you can do is not enable him by letting him slide. Do not let him leech off you too. He needs a dose of reality in the worst way.

 

^^^

 

Great advice. It's true. Parents aren't teaching their kids the concepts of working for a reward. If your friend is caring this habit at 21, it will definitely take a dose of reality to change him.

 

What your doing is kind, but you need to stop. Let him do the learning.

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^ yes, and it's hard to believe that schools are doing the same thing, rewarding everyone and not making them require effort or excellence to get trophies, etc.

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