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How to tell if SHE's cheating?

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Cheating, Flirting, and Jealousy Being unfaithful to your significant other or suspect them of the same? Can't stand the way they flirt? Jealous? Discuss your experiences here.

Old 31st August 2006, 6:08 PM   #1
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How to tell if SHE's cheating?

Hello there, I am new here and dont quite know how to start.
So I guess the begining. My Girlfriend and I met right after she had broken up with her boyfriend of 4 years (we met and started dating a week or two later). Our Love life has been fantastic, once, twice even three time a day wasnt uncommon (im only 23 =)). We have always been very open and I have never had a reason to not trust her...Till recently.. I found (accidently) an email she had sent to her Ex. The same guy she would preach to me for hours about how bad he treated her. He evidently got kicked out of his band, and she sent him an email asking what happened. This is all the email consisted of. However, what i dont understand is why she would want to even know? If this guy was so bad to her, why would she care? When i asked her about him and his band, she made up an entire story about sum1 else teld her (she didnt know i knew she talked to her ex). She didnt even mention him at all. When i confronted her with the email she immediately started crying, saying she lied because she thought if she told me she was talkin to him I would get upset. Which I believe I had every right to. So we worked it out, talked etc... Its been two months since then. Our love life (sex) has gone from at least twice a day to maybe twice a week(over the last 4-6 weeks). She "leaves" for work early and comes home "late". She would constantly text message me with "i love you" atleast twice a day. Now maybe twice a week. I need some advise here. What do these signs indicate to you? Am I over reacting to what could be nothing? Or do i have just cause for concern?
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Old 31st August 2006, 10:44 PM   #2
megnog
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Join Date: Jul 2006
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i don't think you're overreacting.. but don't push her away

you need to ask her why she is leaving early and coming home late? ask her why things have changed.. tell her you feel like she doesn't want to be in the relationship anymore. it was messed up of her to do that.. but all she did was send an email. if that was it, then that was it.

i know my sister dated a guy in a band and he treated her like ****. but for some odd reason she always ran to him. she always wanted to be with him. i don't know why. my mom and i would talk her through how bad he was to her but she didn't care. maybe thats how your gf feels. i hate to break that to you, but if thats the case, then she could still want to be with him.
also, it was a 4yr long relationship. and when did you two start dating? a week afterwards? is that so???? i hope i'm wrong on that one.. thats a bit soon for her to be dating and for her to be completely void of her old feelings for him. its a tricky situation.. but sit her down and ask her why things have changed??
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Old 1st September 2006, 5:00 PM   #3
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Yes we met and started dating roughtly 2 weeks after SHE left him. She couldnt take his crap anymore and she left him. We have been dating for nearly 2 years now and live together. I asked her whats going on with work and why shes going in early etc. And its always some lame excuse. And I know she thinks I think something is going on. After she lied to me I told her it would be hard for me to trust her. I blew up on her when i caught her lieing. I told her when we started dating the worst thing she could do to me is sever our trust, which she did by lieing. I asked her, how do i know your going to work early or staying late, and not just going to meet up with him?(this was during our argument when i caught her lieing). Its very difficult for me to believe what she is telling me. I dont want you to think Im some ******* guy. I was brought up with the utmost respect for women, hell ive been dumped becasue I was to nice and she wasnt "used" to that. It so hard living with sum1 u cant trust. Has any1 been thru this before? Is the trust rebuildable? Anyway it 4pm ans she was supposed to be home at 3. No calls or text messages.. Long night at the office again I suppose =/.......
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