How do I begin to recover???

Guest

I have been dating what I thought was a really wonderful guy for the past 3 months. After the first three weeks, he began pulling away. I could feel it and asked if he was still into me which he said he was. He called me every day usually morning and night (even more often at first! sometimes every 10 minutes!) and was forever telling me wonderful things. Then things started getting wierd. He didn't want to see me, although, HE wouldn't say that.

He started using his kids as the reason for not having time for me, but it was really a lot more than that. Always saying how much he missed me, blah blah blah. I asked if he wanted to take a break and he said no. Then I finally told him I wanted to be "dated" and wasn't getting that from him. He told me he really couldn't have a relationship right now and didn't want anything serious. Here it was only 3 months, I never pressured him for anything! Just wanted to get to know him and although talking on the phone was great, it wasn't enough!

So suddenly, we both stopped calling each other (although, really, he stopped calling me because I rarely called him) and didn't talk for 2 weeks. He calls me and tells me "okay you win" to which I said I was not that petty, and was not playing a game with him. As horrible as those 2 weeks were, I thought we had ended it--we wanted different things. He calls me occasionally now and sent his picture via text message on my cell. I have read "He's Scared/She's Scared" and it explained things to a T!! i mean, it was scary just how spot on it was!

So my thing now is, I must just stop answering his calls because continuing the connection is making this go on longer than necessary and I can't stand the anxiety and pain and pure torture. I really do care about this man ,but he clearly has commitment issues. Once it felt "real" to him, he pulled away and since he didn't want me gone completely, he kept me at arms length by not seeing me and only talking to me.

How does one start to heal from this pain? Its SUCH torture that I wish that proverbial bus would come by and take me out sometimes (okay, not really, but you get the feeling...). HELP!!! I am an intelligent person but yet, I feel like I am losing my mind! I feel stuck in this anguish and can't remember what its like to feel normal!