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Coping Learning to deal with one's emotions and loss.

Old 23rd August 2006, 9:58 PM   #1
dominsane
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 64
Starting NC...

I have decided to start NC today. (Two months after our breakup)
The first couple of hours have been easy...because I only talk to my ex when he's online...but now he's signed on. Actually, he signed on about an hour ago.
And I haven't said anything...I usually say 'hi' when he signs on..and 'goodnight' when i sign off...but that's pretty much it.
And..I pretty much wake up in the morning so I can say those words to him...no matter how pathetic that sounds...

This might not be as hard as I thought.
Or it could be worse. (Since my best friend is his brother's fiancé..and they all live in the same house--I haven't been in the house since we broke up)

Ok, so I just thought it might be good to announce to the world that I'm starting NC.
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Old 23rd August 2006, 10:11 PM   #2
jerbear
 
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Fifth rock from the Sun
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Wish you the best.

My suggestion is to remove him from your IM lists so you do not know when your ex is online or not.

One of the first things I did was delete her from the cell, IM's, email lists, NAV system, etc... to make sure I do not call her, see her, or "accidentally" say hi.
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Old 23rd August 2006, 10:39 PM   #3
bennychase
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Join Date: May 2005
Location: Eastern Virginia
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NC is healing

NC is the only way to heal. Be strong and keep yourself busy. Think about everything except what he may or may not be doing. If you start thinking about him with other people it just brings you down. More importantly, remeber how you feel right now ... at this very moment. Take the feeling in and burn it into your senses. Now, 2 days from now when you are tempted to contact him you will remeber that painful and depressing feeling. If You contact him then you start all over and the feelings come back. You stick to NC then every morning that you wake up it will begin to hurt a little less. And the pain does eventually go away.

I know what its like to start over, and over, and over, and over again. Had I initiated NC a year ago like i knew I needed to, I would have been done with the hurt by now. Its not worth it.

As of right now, I am starting NC with you!!!
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Old 24th August 2006, 12:11 PM   #4
InaPanic
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NC is hard, I am struggling & on day 4 made an attempt at contacting through a PM on a site we both go to. That has been my mistake, being on this site that he stays on all the time. It makes it too tempting. I have to stop myself from going here. You need to remove him from your IM list to help you take the temptation away.
For me I'd been 3 1/2 days seeing him chatting on this site & doing ok, though it still hurt. But yesterday before I could stop myself I sent him a message. I felt this sudden instant relief as soon as i did it. It was weird. Then he responded & I did not respond back. So I'm not sure i would call it contact or not but I did break my own set rule & I 'm not happy with that.
Warning, it may get darker before the dawn. I think that's what yesterday was to me & I failed.
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