I hate MYSPACE!!!!!!!!!!!!

ICantStopLovinHim · 19th April 2006, 9:48 AM

I dont even know where to begin.
I had a myspace page it was cool to see so MANY of my friends that i never would have thought had their own space.
Until......i looked up my current boyfriend of 3 /12 years ex wife's name and well well well she has a page. It didnt say anything incriminating or nothing like that but she listed herself as married, and said she loves being a housewife...now im like WTF??? So i message her and suggest she change her page since her and my boyfriend are now going through a divorce.

Well that started the turmoil of my terrible last few days!!!!!
Now she keeps leaving blogs saying that her and her husband have been having sex that im a home wrecker that they watch movies together etc. etc. etc.
Now i am an adult i know these things are not true i know in my heart she puts that there for the very reason that i will read it and get hurt. WELL YA KNOW WHAT?? its working I deleted my page i guess she went into my pics and saw all these pics of me and my b/f and our son and she flipped out!

She was never able to have kids with my b/f she tied her tubes before they met but he did help her raise the two she has. And now she did know about our son but i guess knowing and seeing are two different things. So now she will not allow my b/f to see her children whom he calls his and they call him dad. And every day she puts a new post about how she loves talking to her husband and seeing him and having phone sex blah blah. Its KILLING me.
He and i broke up last year for about 7 months it was a terrible misunderstanding but we worked it out. ANd now he is mad at me for every responding to her page and even more upset that i still read hers every day and only find myself at work crying to read what in my heart i know isnt true.

So stop going to the website yousay?? i cant its like a drug i have since deleted my page but i can still see hers and its killing me. I have gone into deep depression and now my b/f is ready to leave. He says he just cant be with someone who will second guess his every move and i cant say that i blame him.....PLEASE someone tell me how to help myself? PLEase im dying inside i dont know what to do PLEASE HELP

SmoochieFace · 19th April 2006, 9:53 AM

You need to seek out some therapy... and not necessarily the sort doled out by a psychotherapist. It seems as if you have an *addiction* issue and it may help you bunches to switch off the computer, go outside, take in the beautiful spring weather, and let all of this drama go. Become *addicted* to the *good* things in life. You'll feel better... I promise.

Now I know why I never got involved in that MySpace thingy...

Art_Critic · 19th April 2006, 10:00 AM

Instead of deleting you could've made your profile private.

Only people that are on your friends list can see your profile..

By the way.. you picked the fight.. you never should've messaged her

Sassy · 19th April 2006, 10:03 AM

What is the reason he is wanting to leave? Is the fact you found out that they are still sleeping together? Are you arguing about it cause you are accusing him of doing it or it is it guilt that he is. If you know in your heart and gut he isn't doing it then why is bothering you? Do you feel that it is true? If it isn't nothing going on he shouldn't be mad at you for viewing the page. Maybe something is going on ?

whichwayisup · 19th April 2006, 10:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Art_Critic

Instead of deleting you could've made your profile private.

Only people that are on your friends list can see your profile..

By the way.. you picked the fight.. you never should've messaged her

I agree 100% with A_C. You opened this can of worms and now the consquences are being felt.

And Smooch is right too, you need some help to get you through this. Talk to your DR about finding a therapist. If you don't deal with this head-on, your life will take an even worse spiral down.

Do this not only for yourself, but for your son! He needs you, so it's time get life back to normal.

ICantStopLovinHim · 19th April 2006, 10:08 AM

He suggested leaving because like the other poster said I PICKED THE FIGHT>

And now i keep letting it get to me and he is getting angry that i am second guessing his every move when ever he is gone too long or what not i bring it back to him being with her.

I dont think they are doing anything. I KNOW she is lying but it is still hurting me so much. I deleted my page because my b/f didnt know about it and he got hurt thinking i was using myspace to talk to other men in our area so he told me i should get rid of it.
I guess i could have set it to private but im trying not to go on it anymore i dont want her to know she is getting to me. I mean her page said NOTHING about him untill i wrote her so this is all my fault. I am pushing my boyfriend away he told me that i make him feel since our break up that we took 4 steps forward and now 5 steps back because of this. I WISH WISH WISH i never wrote to her i am so full of regret its not funny. The only problem with staying off the computer is i WORK on one. Thats where i am now at work. I have seriously considered a job change because of this. I just dont know what to do.

littlekitty · 19th April 2006, 10:10 AM

With all due respect, regardless of how long you've been together etc. you had absolutely no right to contact his exwife to tell her to change her page.

'Their' marriage, was between 'them'. If anyone was going to ask her to remove the reference to 'thier' marriage it should have been him.

No offence, but you kinda bought this on yourself didn't you? I think you know you did.

Now you're getting the crap for it unfortunately. She knows you went hunting for her page, and she knows you're going to keep checking it. She knows she's provoking a reaction and causing an issue, and she's probably quite delighted about it. Is it right? No! She's being an ass too quite frankly, but that's just how these things go.

I suggest you stop checking her page for a start, that will mean you don't spend your whole time worrying about something which isn't happening. Get some help for yourself too. It would be good for you to talk this through in therapy.

Best wishes.

Sassy · 19th April 2006, 10:12 AM

Well she is probably trying to make you think something is going on so that it will cause problems with you and your bf. Leave it be and stop going to her website ,and remember you have him and his child not her!!

whichwayisup · 19th April 2006, 10:12 AM

Look, you can't control what she does/thinks/feels so why freak out about it. By doing that it's pissing your boyfriend off, so much so that he may leave you. Now, HE should be abit understanding in the sense that he needs to give some TLC to you and maybe keep confirming his love for you, but YOU need to stop thinking bad thoughts and jumping to conclusions that he's with her. He's told you he isn't, so believe that. And please, STOP going on her myspace page. Therapy CAN help you deal with your obsession. I hate to say it, but it IS an obsession.

ICantStopLovinHim · 19th April 2006, 10:26 AM

I am going to try therapy my lil sis gave me a number of one she used to see.

Maybe i needed it before this because of our break up being so hard on me. He worked so hard to prove to me its his family that he wants and now all i do is not trust him I feel terrible BUT I CANT STOP IT.

This is ALL MY fault i shouldnt have said anything to her i know she resented me thinking that if i never met him maybe he would have given their marriage another try she is 5 years older than me and they have been apart for almost 4 years and yet she still hasnt moved on with someone new. That makes me think that possibly he was still leading her on. I dont know all i do know is he goes to work and comes home he takes care of his family and occasionally visits with friends never enough to make me think he is cheating, and yet its all i think about I HATE MY SPACE i wish it would just dissappear.

hotgurl · 19th April 2006, 10:37 AM

I just had one question is he actually divorced or are they still in process?

But really you have tot rusty him and not accuse him. Why don't you get net nanny or something similar and block the site?

ICantStopLovinHim · 19th April 2006, 10:39 AM

They are in the process....he was served papers just a week ago.

What is the net nanny?

ICantStopLovinHim · 19th April 2006, 10:46 AM

They are in the process....he was served papers just a week ago.

When i met him he had within days just moved out of their home. But it has been years already and now we have a child. And i find it hard to trust now every time he wants to go there and see his children. But that is something i have to try to deal with because he is the only father they have known

What is the net nanny?

hotgurl · 19th April 2006, 10:57 AM

maybe you feel so insecure because your relationship started so sonn after he left and the divorce is not final. 3 1/2 years that seems long for a divorce.

Net nanny is one of the security programs made for parents to block thier kids from accessing certain sites. I think you can customize them and put myspace on there so when you try to go it says the site is block.

We have something similar on our computer for my daugther but it blocks more things like porn and chat room etc...

But that way if you really have no control you can block yourself from going to myspace but I would also go to couseling as well.

ICantStopLovinHim · 19th April 2006, 11:21 AM

Well to make the LONG story short she is the cause of our separation last summer. That is when she realized he wasnt comming back or whatever and that is when she started the divorce proceedings. He never did and i cant say anything to that as I am still legally married to my first kids father

She lies alot to make people feel bad i learned that the hard way a year ago and now i am allowing her to do it again and i hate it since my last post i have checked her site twice... i have a serious problem

and yet he has called me twice today to see how im doing because he is so concerned with what im going through......I'm so pathetic. I am going to look into maybe and IT tec from here my job to see if he can block the webpage for me because i only look at it here when im at work.