Hi people. I'm majorly depressed. Bloody hell...
About August last year, I met a charming British woman online (LDR, already one strike against me). Very intelligent, beautiful. We didn't immediately hit it off, but we became really close for a while and though at first I didn't want anything serious, stupid me I fell in love with her. Around the end of December, there began to arise some problems, and we struggled through it. One breakup later, around February, we decided to give it some time...
Later I would discover that I made a terrible mistake in ever "separating". She teased me, saying that I shouldn't have let her go at all. Well now she's finally filled me in that I'm "not the right one". I've been going absolutely crazy for the past 36 hours. I haven't eaten much, I can't sleep well, even television doesn't help. It's something of a need for me to be with someone to love and to love me back... she's more the independent type, but I can see either way that we're not getting back together...
She's 6 years younger than I am, and a college student. I just feel like this breakup could have been over with months ago when I was not so firmly attached to her. I can't help but blame her for the intense pain I feel right now, because she honestly doesn't seem to care that I'm hurting and alone. I'm seriously bummed about this. Where did I go wrong? I'm a decent guy, and I feel I didn't deserve to be kicked to the curb like that after she showed such interest and was the real go-getter in the early stages of the relationship. I feel empty. I feel like I won't be able to care about anyone that way for years...
Life is a bitch. The Warmachine has broken down.
Linear Mode
