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my ex wans to have physical relationship ..

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Cheating, Flirting, and Jealousy Being unfaithful to your significant other or suspect them of the same? Can't stand the way they flirt? Jealous? Discuss your experiences here.

Old 5th March 2006, 6:08 AM   #1
wasted
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my ex wans to have physical relationship ..

my ex dumped me two months back coz she fell in love with someone else ! But few days later she said she wanted to make love with me. We did. I thought she still loved me. But then she says she loves the other guy. But she doesnt have any sexual relationship with him. I still love her so much. So much that i thought continuing sexual relationship will retain her love and attention to me.

But now i realize that she is already cheating on him ! coz she is sleeping with me ! ..

I cant understand women.

I want to make love with her and she wants that too . Should i go ahead ?
or will i be doing wrong ??

Help me out !
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Old 5th March 2006, 11:47 AM   #2
Spectre
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My advice? if you wanna have sex with ho's, get hookers. Less emotional baggage, plus they leave right after.
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Old 5th March 2006, 11:52 AM   #3
JayKay
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If you like lots of drama, go right ahead.

If you'd prefer not to deal with her issues, I'd say "No thanks, I'm not THAT hard up,"
and move on.
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Old 5th March 2006, 2:39 PM   #4
tikigods
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I agree with Spectre, she is just going to love you and then leave you, and if you don't allow yourself to say no then you are just going to get the old wounds reopened each time you sleep with her.

She has told you she doesn't love you, and doesn't want anything other then your lovins' then why do you keep it going?
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Old 5th March 2006, 2:59 PM   #5
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hmm if you have no problems being a FWB, then i see no problem in using each other like this. As long as you dont have expecations coming from this, or put yourself up to get shotdown....

However if u DO want to get back with her secretly, then i'd advise the best thing to do is NC and move on.
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Old 6th March 2006, 10:22 AM   #6
wasted
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well .. i hate ho'es ..

i know if i get back with her on bed old would are going to come up again .

i also know doing NC is the best thing if i want her back. But without me she will be in so much trouble. I have been the real life saver for her for the past one year , at work, with her family, with her finances and all. I know she need me for everything .. even for sex.

And after reading so many articles out here, i m so confused if i want her back ? After all she ditched me to someone else. Even then i care for her. And at this point if i start NC, it will be almost like killing her. ( might sound weird ) .. she is so dependant on me

u might say, why do i still care for her .. i cant stop caring for her.

But i dont know if i cant trust her as much. I wud have respected her decision if she had not approach me for sex. I actually feel she is so attracted with me still, even if she wants to use me physically, and i m happy with that . She hasnt forgotten me.

People tell me sex is the binding thing .. i will bind u gusy together .. she will come back.. I guess i might me temporary .. till she gets that from her new bf

wat to do ?

P.S - NC is impossible since we are working in the same office, in the same project and we are field partners. Doing NC means i will not be working efficiently.
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Old 6th March 2006, 10:48 AM   #7
littlekitty
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Sex is bonding thing? Utter crap!

I've been where you are. I loved him... he loved ****ing me. I thought if I kept ****ing him he'd soon realise how much he loved me, and wanted me. If I could change this or that he'd realise he was in love with me.

I even fooled myself into thinking how could he be seeing me and only me (and he was) every week, spending weekends like lovers and not feel something? I dunno how... but he sure did!!

It took me 3 years of pain to finally extract myself from the situation. Once I healed, I never looked back. I was blind and stupid. I allowed myself to be used.

Don't hurt yourself more. Go NC and don't look back.
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Old 6th March 2006, 1:02 PM   #8
yawhatever
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Wasted - its true, if you really do love her (and don't just want sex) like you claim you do, then let her go. Don't let her have what she wants, this will not initiate any thinking within her, either she does love you but dosn't realize it because she gets what she wants, and she wants sex so she gets it.

I agree with the posts above, if you want to ever secretly get back together with her just don't have sex with her because there is too much baggage. Plus she is using you and messing with your feelings, don't use her back even though you claim to love her, realize she is just using you, because right now she claims she dosn't love you, and you do love her.

Don't let her push you around into getting what she wants, stop helping her out with her life... Occupy your time other ways, if I just stay at home and do nothing, dont keep occupied, am bored, all I think about is how bad I feel about what happened between my ex and I (she cheated on me). But the best thing is to go out with your friends, meet new people, live your life, whatever, its not the end of the world.
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Old 6th March 2006, 1:17 PM   #9
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I have been in a very similar situation. My BF broke up with me but I was always there for him when he wanted to hook up because I thought that was the only time that I could prove to him that I was perfect for him. He moved to the opposite coast and I still traveled to see him a bunch of times.

Its not going to work. Plain and simple. If she's moved on she's not thinking of you the way she did before and nothing will be able to go back to the way things were... ever. Spend some time alone in order to get your mind back together. The working together thing is gonna suck for a while but when you go to work you are there for a business need and in order to earn your paycheck. Tell her that and remind her that you two are not togehter so you need to remain professional at work.
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Old 6th March 2006, 8:09 PM   #10
PlentyLV007
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U think you want her back!

Okay bobo...listen ok....
U don't want her back.....u think you do....I'm not trying to judge her or nothing cause we only know your side but, so far, she's shady and playing you. She's getting her cake and eating it too...and your letting her.
You need to tell her no and tell her to leave you a lone.
Don't matter how much she cries, tells you she's sorry, tells you she'll change or tells you that it's only you cause you know ....actions speak louder than words...and your right....she's cheating on her man now w/ you...imagine....
you could be her man and she could be cheating on you.... Hell naw!!!!!

Trust....let her b and look at her like she's never meant anything...just let her go and trust me....she'll want to come back but ,don't ...because just like geniuwine said...."what's so different when you left him to be w/ me...what makes me think you won't do that to me"...

Good luck!!!
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Old 6th March 2006, 8:43 PM   #11
Spectre
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wasted
well .. i hate ho'es ..

You answered your own question, you hate hoes, she is a hoe, so move on.
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Old 6th March 2006, 9:17 PM   #12
tikigods
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You don't need to take care of her at all.
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Old 9th March 2006, 4:37 PM   #13
geminisarita
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Sound like you need to get rid of your ex girlfriend. She is the one who dump you to be with another guy. Let her stay with the other guy and be miserable without the sex. She made her choice. If you keep having sex with her, she is goin to bring dramas ang games in your life that you will get tired of. She is not goin to stand up for you when her boyfriend treat you like crap too. She is goin to be on his side. Let her go and move on with your life. You will find someone better who will treat you with respect, not use you for sex only. You need to tell her to leave you alone and work on her sex issues with her boyfriend.
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