[Skippy.]

Hello there everyone! I found this totally by accident, but since I’m here now I think I’ll ask you friendly looking bunch of people for some advice

Basically, I need some advice on meeting new people. Mainly girls really since I don’t get on all that well with other guys, but I’m not really ‘after’ a girl as such. I just want a new group of friends.

At school I had lots of male friends, but no female ones, and when I left school I basically left that group of friends behind me and made a new group when I was at college that was made up mainly of girls. But most of them went to universities all over the country and moved away from here leaving me all alone I’m still friends with them, but they’re just not local so I can’t really just go out to the cinema with them or anything, so what I need to do is meet some new people, but I’m not sure how!

I’m a little shy, and don’t really know where I could go on my own to meet people. People say work is a great place to meet new people, but I work in a school and I’m the youngest member of staff there (21) and nearly everyone is quite a bit older than me, making them not much use at meeting people similar to my age. There are a lot of kids who are interested in me and stuff….but I don’t really fancy socialising with 13/14 year old kids on the weekends

I also don’t drink alcohol, which some say is a big problem when it comes to meeting/hanging out with people. I’m not against drinking or anything. I just think alcohol tastes like crap

So…there’s my problem. Any help/advice would be greatly appreciated

(I live in the UK if that helps? I just thought maybe Americans may have different ways of making new friends than UK people or something )

[Outcast]

Go anyplace people gather. Join a volunteer group - politics, social action, charity, festival aides, etc. Take classes. Go to local events in your town. Take up a hobby. There's a club for just about any activity - there's even walking clubs. Check your phone book and your local internet and newspapers for activities and organizations that might interest you.

[JayKay]

I agree.

Join any club that you would find interesting; since moving to a new state, I've joined book clubs, hiking clubs and have done volunteer work. It helped a lot with integrating into a new place.

And don't worry so much about people being older than you at work; lots of older people like hanging with younger people. You may find you have more in common than you think!
Having older friends is great; they can advise you on things they've already experienced that you haven't.

[Cappe]

I agree with outcast.One question though,you say your the youngest in your workplace.Well I can relate to that,the second youngest person in my workplace is 12 years older than me,and married.But sometimes we have a night out,which in my opinion is the easiest way to make friends.

Also,I am pretty sure you can go to the pub without drinking.Just go up to the bar and ask for a a coke or orange juice i.e. and make conversasion with whoever your in line with.Hell,make conversasion with bartender if he/she aint busy.

It's always good to know how to hold a decent conversasion as well,so keep your ears open at all times.Have fun bud.

[TheSwordfish]

I was impressed by the alcohol part in your post. I don't drink either. never stopped me from making friends. It stoppes me from kissing the wrong girls and doing thinsg I would have regretted. So don't blame it on that. Just socialise, you can meet new friends everywhere.

I was in the position where I had to many friends (aquantances) becaue I switched to another study three times. Ended up with too many groups I had to go out with and couldn't keep up with it. Now I have three really close friends, and about vife other people I reckon as good friends. The rest are aquantances I don't regurly hang out with.

Getting a completely ne wgroup of friends sounds hard, but if you can be yourself you wil find them

[Skippy.]

Joining classes and clubs do sound like very good ideas. I don't really know of any clubs and things in my area, but I'm sure I'll be able to find some with a little research Although I wouldn't really know what kind of club to go for. I guess I'll just have to see what's out there.

Originally Posted by Cappe

It's always good to know how to hold a decent conversasion as well

Oh dear...I'm not very good at that I'm fine with people I know, but find it really hard to make conversation with strangers, and I'm useless with small talk. That and my confidence is something I've been working on the past few years. I'm getting there slowly though

[jerbear]

Originally Posted by Skippy.

Oh dear...I'm not very good at that I'm fine with people I know, but find it really hard to make conversation with strangers, and I'm useless with small talk. That and my confidence is something I've been working on the past few years. I'm getting there slowly though

Great view to have!

small talk.... have you gotten into a habit of reading the morning paper, blog, news sites, and others. If someone asks how is the weather, you have an answer, then it transisitions to what do you think about xyz event and since you read something about it. Give your opinion.

[Outcast]

Good conversation doesn't start with you sayng things; it starts with you asking things.