[siCKness]

well.. im new to this forum.. and its very interesting how people would go online to talk about relationships. imo, i would rather do it in person.. because it just gets everything out of my chest.. and i tend to get a lot more emotional and i just need to get all of that out.. i know how it feels like when a girl gets her heart broken.. and wow... its reallyyy sad that they go through all that for someone.. someone who means a lot in their lives.. i only know how it feels like for a couple of break ups but i dont know how it feels someone breaking up with me repeatedly.. because ive done that enough times to her.. not realizing what it did in the relationship.. i just love the way how girls love their man.. especially the way my girl who i considered my wife loved me.. it was soooo different from any kind of love.. i guess it was selfish love.. and i really love that.. and your probably gona lecture me on that topic but hey.. it made me happy right?? it madee me real happy.. it's real happiness that you wont ever forget.. it'll always be cherished in your heart forever.. no one can take it away because no other happiness will compare to how happy you were with that someone.. (im sorry if i confused any of you with my words not making sense because.. i have a problem where i think of my wonderful amazing girl at the same time when writing.. and i can only do one of them.. and it seems that i do a lot more thinking of her than anything else...)

well she showed me what real love was.. it was the selfish love.. the one where you want someone all to yourself.. and i was like "whoaaa..." ive never felt this feeling with anyone else except her.. i felt like i was the only guy in this world.. i felt so special.. i felt so blessed.. i felt like i wanted to do anything for her.. and i did.. i moved out to my aunt's house while my family moved out somewhere else so i can stay with my girl.. and the type of relationship we had was it only involved us.. no one else.. we isolated ourselves from other ppl so we can spend more time with eachother and hopefully not cause any more problems.. and it was really greattttt.. great enough for me to thank God everyday for her.. i prayed for us everyday.. i prayed that we'll last everlastingly..

in this "all wanting you to myself" relationship was really great.. we even wore the clothes where no one will look at us cos we had some problems where girls talked to me asking for my phone numberr and guys stalking her.... im a very very very very very jealous type.. and i get sooo sad and mad when a stupid kid looks at my girl... and what does it mean when a girl wants to wear what she wants but shes not doing it for other ppl, shes only doing this for herself.. what does that mean? cos i used to be a guy who wanted attention from girls by wearing nice attracting clothing. and i only did that to impress other girls..and now i dont know what that means.. and this was one of the reasons she broke up with me.. cos she missed what she wore.. she also broke up with me cos she missed her friends.. since we isolated ourselves from them.. she also misses hanging out with them.. she also broke up with me cos we had so much "rules.." rules that apply to a selfish relationship.. she missed everything and i feeel sooo bad for taking away all that from her.. i just wanted her all myself..

she's also my first in everything.. every single thing you can think of in a relationship.. and i cant seem to let that go.. and im positive no other girl will treat and love me as much as her.. please dont lecture me saying i did a bad thing.. cos i already know ive done such an awful job as being a boyfriend.. i took her away from everything.. frig... wow.. im so sorry for everything i caused her... and please dont say to get another girl.. cos i know that the girl wouldnt be like her and the type of girl i would want is her.. and im positive that no other girl would go thru all those things for me.. im sure no girl would dress a certain way, think in a certain way where ppl wouldnt matter at all, do things a certain way where ppl wouldnt matter and go thru where the littlest things matters.. im sorry if im confusing all of you.. but i get sooooo happy when someone has all of those characteristics and features.. and i did find her.. now shes gone.... all gone.. i missed out on so many other things in this relationship.. so if you have any questions or if you're confused just tell me. i'll answer it. all of what i said is just a very very very very short summary of my relationship. i know missed a lot of things so ask me if you're confused which your probably are now... haha.. just to tell you guys i failed englishhh hahahaha.

so she broke up with me on valentines day.. and we lasted 1 year and 3 months.. it may be short but the memories we shared we'll last a lifetime.. she broke up with me cos she wasnt herself.. i guess. she broke up with me cos we cared about the littles things like not looking at other ppl(since we had no feelings for them there was no point of looking at them).. maybe it was me who made everything a lot more complicated.. and yes i do have a weird taste of love and i would never change the way i would love my wife.. it may sound harsh but at least im happy right? so right now.. im going to be single for decades.. cos i know no one is like her and no one will be.. i also tried to break up with her so many times before and she just had enough so shes breakin up with me.. i cant blame her.. anyways i just wana say i respect all the ladies out there.. im sorry for all the ladies who went through so many breakups yet they still wanted that stupid man when they didnt care at all...


wowowow all of you are probably confused but... if you do understand.. should i be friends or not? cos i asked for another chance and she said theres no chance of us gettin back.. that really hurts hearing that from her.. and i dont want her to be my friend cos it hurts when she does things we wont normally do in our relationship and i still have the same feelings for her but even stronger.. so if i just be her friend i'll get hurt and get jealous all the time.. right now im not talking to her and she was crying when i said no more phone calls or seeing eachother no more.. meaning we no longer are friends no more.. so shes just writing me emails now and then to tell me how she is and how her day went.. should i just be single and forget about her? or be friends and get hurt all the time? or ask for another chance even though it wont happen but it doesnt hurt to try one more time. tell me please.. im heart is dying.. and i think its the end of the world.. please dont lecture me cos ive been lectured too many times now.. thanks again for all your help and contribution. =D.. God Bless to all!

[Da_1_n_OnlyN3na]

o wow...let me just say that when i first started reading your post my eyes got so watery i wanted to cry..lol i understood everything you said i wasnt confused at all...you know why? because people who are in love understand each other and their feelings...i am trully in love right now so i know how you feel....my story is very very long it kept going even after me and my ex broke up...its been so hard but im not going to go there..

well..i didnt think guys suffer from love also..to me guys always seem to care about us girls when they feel like it or because they have to or when their friends arent around because they would say "dwag your gay" or sum shyt like that...now your the first guy i see that actually loves the person he was with...i know how you feel when you say that she told you that theres no chance of you both getting back when she said many times she loved you like no other and now she doesnt think of you both getting back....my ex has told me that he misses me and wants me back but he never took me back...he was always there but he blames himself and says that he brings bad luck to a realtionship because all his other relationships have turned out bad....my relationship with him was broken up by his friends and by me not believing him 100% (but now i know that "eyes believe themselves, but the ears believe other people")and him for letting his friends choose his route for him....i dont know what hes afraid of but love conquers everything...its true...and i guess only i have that..

nowadays how many divorces and separations do you see? why get married if the next day your going to leave that person..people play too much with marriage now ..they dont take it seriously... they waste so much time doing that when other people really need it...do u know what i mean?? all this happenes because theres no real love between them....

with me you have no idea what i would do for the person i love...thats why i understand you...so many adults have forgotten what love means and now us young people are living it...give it time only time will tell if she doesnt come back its because thats the way destiny wanted it that way...im not going to tell you to move on forget about her because you cant...ive been told that so many times...and ive tried so many things NC, being in another relationship with someone else (was not the same),trying to ignore his phone calls, praying to god to help me forget about him,ect, but nothing has worked..no matter how much damage that love is causing you it will always be there because she is so deep inside your heart that you cant get her out...if she never comes back you will always have her inside of you....i hope i was of any help....good luck

[siCKness]

awwwwwwwww.. thanksss a lottt Da_1_n_OnlyN3na.. it makes me really emotional seeing someone else being emotional as well.. =P.. it's real nice to hear that theres someone out there like Da_1_n_OnlyN3na who cares what i have to say and who understands what i say.. im real blessed.. i truly am.. one thing i can never stop doing is talking about how my life changed with a girl who i considered to be my wife.. we made so many future plans together.. and were just young too.. we even named our first daughter.. (i want a daughter first =D) well.. the same goes for mee too.. i guess her friends were also one of the reasons why we broke up.. her friends told her "if hes doing all this to you, why are you still with him?" "are you happy?" "if you go back to him, we'll HATE YOU FOREVER..!" wow.. hearing that really hurts.. it hurts me so much.. cos when im with my friends they say the same to me too.. but i dont listen to them at all.. i give them many number one reasons why i shouldnt break up with her.. first of all she has a unique and rare personality which no one else has.. shes the only girl who made my heart beat at its fastest.. ( i swear to my life she was the only one and holds a record of it), shes the only one who made me do crazy adorable things (like doin 20 push ups in the road where theres cars to show her i would do anything for her.. awwwwww.. i miss that....) shes the only girl i walk to class, shes the only girl that made teachers scream at me for being late and teachers saying im the last one to get in class and the first to get out, she's the only girl who made me talk about her 24/7, she's the only girl that made me extra catious on the littlest things (like when she gives me a pencil, i wouldnt let ANYONE USE IT, cos its reaaaaaaal special to me and only i can use it, NO ONE ELSE! =DDD) she's the only girl that makes me always come back to her even though she breaks up with me ='(.... she's the only girl that made feel handsome, shes the only girl who ive ever considered beautiful and gorgeous.. shes the only girl i called my wife..., shes the only girl that made me cryyy..... a lot... and shes the only girl i see in this world(in my eyes..).. and theres soooo much more.. but you guys will get bored of it so ima keep it shortt =P. i know no one would be as close as being her, cos no one would go thru as much as her.. and im blessed that i got to be with her.. im glad my life at least reached its highest point where i was truly happy.. not a lot of ppl reach that point but im more than HAPPY that i got to reach that exciting point with her.. you guys are probably tired of me talking about her, but hey.. thats all i do, and thats all i want to do.. i wana show the world how special and AMAZING she is to me.. and if she deserves someone, it wouldnt be me........... i love her so much.. that i want her to have a life that she has always wanted.. even though im no longer going to be in her life.. or be that special person to be with her forever.. i'll still support her.. if she likes someone else...... then i'll still support her..... as long as shes happy.. i'll be happy.. =D.. life is short.. and im soooo glad.. God has let me to be with her in such a small period of time.. shes the love of my life.. and theres no one in the world who i would say that to except her.. shes still the queen of my hearts.. and shes deserves the world.. i love her..... to a point i cant do anything else.. i cant do anything right now.. except flash back to all the unforgettable memories we shared.. it tears me apart that i can no longer have memories with her.. awwwwwww... im gettin too emotional right now.. anywayss... yahh.. she made me real emotional too.. i guess i have too much of a feminem side than the masculin side. yes, yes.. im girlyy.. dont hatee though =P.


anyways.... everytime i remember all the great times we shared.. makes me want to take the bus all the way where she lives just to see her.. even for one minute.. its worth it.. we're now far away from eachother.. but that doesnt stop me from seeing her.. and its sad that i couldve stayed with her instead of moving out with my family.. but i respect her wishes.. and if letting her go would make her happy.. then i would let it be....... oh... i really need her right now.....







........so umm i have a question though.. when a girl says she wants to wear what she wants but shes doing this for herself not for other ppl.. what does that mean...? thanks again for your help guys! God Bless!!!!


and wow.. thanks again Da_1_n_OnlyN3na.. i would give you a hug.. but i would feel guilty cos i know my girl wouldnt like that even though were not together no more.... and if i were to give you a hug it would be the first hug i got from a girl since 1 year and 3months ago.. anyways.. thanks again.. and im sorry for those ppl who dont understand me.. im just a weird guy who loves his girl to the most EXTREME, or in other words, i love her to lifes fullest =D!.. no one can change that because i still think shes the one.. thanks to all and thanks Da_1_n_OnlyN3na for making me feeeel better =DDDD! God Bless!

[siCKness]

any one think they have an anwer to my question?

........so umm i have a question though.. when a girl says she wants to wear what she wants but shes doing this for herself not for other ppl.. what does that really mean...?

thanks.. and God Bless!

[Da_1_n_OnlyN3na]

awww no problem....and yes always say that ur blessed because god put her infront of you and made you feel the things you do...no matter wut she will always be the one for you...when someone says that "shes that one for me" or "hes the one for me" it doesnt just mean that your going to end up with the person but it means that shes the one that took your heart.....for ever and no one else will make you feel the same way..atleast thats how i see it..lol

and to answer your question when a girl says that, they mean that they want to wear the clothes they like to wear and makes them feel them you know... she is not going to wear a certain type of clothes so people will like her or to satisfy other people, she wants to wear them because she likes to. i hope that clears it up a little.