Keeping it Alive

Cheryl

Hello, it's me again and I have a question maybe someone could answer. I wrote Confused and Hurt. It is about the same guy. I left him a message on his voicemail saying that I knew that the next time I spoke to him it would be to dissolve our relationship. He had an attitude and we did not speak at all that weekend. It was so bad that he got as close as a foot away and didn't say a word. Things were horrible. Yet, I had made my decision and I had to stick to it.

Later on the next week, I called the house becasue I wanted to speak to him. I wanted to know if it would be alright if I still had conversations with his brother. No, I do not even think of his brother like that. He is like my baby bro. Even though he is a year younger than me I feel like I am much older. Anyway, we talked. We didn't argue or fight, we just conversated. Everything was cool. I told him that since I did not like his attitude I had sent him a curse out letter. He said okay and that he understood.

He got the letter 2 days later and he got furious. I had put my query and a response I got inside the envelope too. He actually called me up. That was a shocker. He rarely calls me. I was kind of nervous and asked him if he was going to yell at me or if he was mad at me. He said no. Yet, he told me that he was so pissed that he had to walk around for 2 hours before he could call me. And boy, oh boy did we argue. We were on the phone yelling for almost 45 minutes. He said that he was ready to call it quits. Then I was able to calm him down. Do not ask me how I did it. I think that somehow he knows that I can calm him down so he comes to me. Does that sound stupid? He started laughing again. We hung up with a peace treaty intact. This will be the last weekend I see him for 3 months.

Here is the question. What did he mean by call it quits? We really didn't have an existing relationship before. When his brother asked what I was to him, I told him that I was just a lady in his life. I wasn't his friend, nor am I now. If I was, we wouldn't be having issues every other week. No matter how bad it gets we always gravitate back towards one another. That is totally confusing. I understand that we are friends in a twisted sort of confusing way. But I am lost. I am the affectionate sort. He understands this and he allows me certain liberties in public. When I ask him questions that can be of a delicate matter between us, he doesn't laugh. He waits and then answers me patiently. He even talks to me about his problems and I try to help him solve them or I just give him mental and physical support.

What am I to him? I cannot ask because then he will think that I am trying to make something out of nothing. HELP!