[manders_01]

A close friend from college lives just a few miles from me. Before living here (CO), I would see her and her husband when I'd visit. I was the "wedding coordinator" for their wedding. We were really close in college and aren't as much anymore but she's still a good friend. When I moved here, we spent a good amount of time together but what her and I like to do and what her husband likes to do differ completely.

Since I've moved here for the second time, I had been going to their house on Tuesday nights and then seeing each other intermintantly. On one of our "outings", things went not so well. Her husband treated her and thier baby terribly. He was so rude. And then he and I got into a arguement over something fairly black and white. However, he is one of those types of people that has to be right all the time. We gotten into arguements before, but this one was truly the straw that broke the camel's back.

I don't want to be around him at all anymore. I have made excuses to see only my friend or not see her at all just so I don't have to be around him. They really don't have any other friends they hang out with so I feel bad that I have to do this, especially since I still want to see her (and the baby).

Should I just have a frank conversation with her and tell her how I feel, knowing that is she doesn't like what I have to say, there is a potential to lose her. Or should I keep my mouth shut and continue the excuses? Anyone have to go through this before?

[JayKay]

That's a tough one.

Since you've been friends for a long time, I'd try to be as honest as I could without causing a rift; maybe say

"I think your husband and I have a hard time seeing eye to eye. I'm sure he's a great guy, but our personalities just don't seem to mesh.
I really miss our time together and hope that this doesn't hurt our friendship. "